Is this rape?

[bumbleboots]

Met a guy on tinder.
Arranged to meet for a late drink.
Got on well.
There seemed to be chemistry.
Both recent break ups after 4 year plus long relationship.
On the rebound
Agree to have sex.
Go back to his hotel.
Kissing. Fingering (sorry) etc.
He then penetrated me without a condom.
I said "no, you need a condom"
He carries on.
I make to move myself away.
He won't let go.
I said "no you need a condom"
He holds me down and cums inside me.
I am shocked
Feel ridiculously stupid
I put myself in a bad position
I say nothing
Get dressed
Go home
In shock
He unmatched me on tinder
I am covered in his cum
I feel disgusting
In shock
Feel stupid

So sorry OP.

The ex isn't exactly helpful to say the least . You can get through this without him. You've managed to make a report to the police by yourself with no family support so you have already proven even during a crisis you are an exceptional, strong and capable woman.

You can lean on yourself, you havent let yourself down, you haven't done anything wrong. Stay as hardy as you have been and you'll make it through this.

Yeah fuck off Bumbleboot’s Ex- this is NOT about you- so if you can’t be supportive and decent then just stay away.

Please do consider the freedom program or similar @bumbleboots as you could do with some support and understanding from people who won’t victim blame you. Gentle hugs to you today

What the hell? Be viewed it as cheating?! Block him on everything. He is clearly an abusive wanker.

Block your ex, you dont need that bullshit right now.

Do you have a friend you can trust to comfort you instead?

OP, I'm so sorry that you were raped, and I'm so sorry your ex is a wanker. But you, you are amazing and so strong and brave.

Have you got a friend you can confide in or lean on for support? Or have you been given any support lines/sexual abuse charities to get in touch with? You deserve some support through this.

My "friends" haven't helped. Dr is away. Counselling services not getting back to me. Ex boyfriend is furious at me and made me apologise to him. He is a dick head. Having panic attacks and bad dreams. Bit stuck. Only people being nice is son's dad who is looking after son and ex ex boyfriend but he has gf who wouldn't like it understandably so no appropriate. Thinking of going a and e for psychiatrist

Oh bumble boots I'm so sorry to hear the lack of support in RL. Can you contact rape crises I do believe they have out of hours support and can offer email and telephone support!! Strength and love to you at this time!! 💐

So sorry to hear you're struggling so much. It's understandable. Please do go to A and E if you feel in crisis- there'll be a bit of a wait of course but they'll be sound, and it'll also mean you get other help more quickly. Thinking of you xxx

You've been very strong OP. I often can't bear to read these sorts of threads because quite selfishly, it's frustrating to hear of all these 'men' getting away with it. I know its more complicated than that and its not as clear cut when you're in the situation yourself. You have done something to hopefully stop this vile peice of shit doing this to his next tinder date!!! Take one hour at a time. Take care if yourself. Block the dickhead ex. You don't need any additional guilt.
You have done absolutely wrong.

Yeah I am sorry to share I totally find these threads distressing but you have all been so helpful and helped me through. I'm grateful. I will be ok.

I'm so sorry this happened to you. Well done for reporting it to the police, you did the right thing and what happened is NOT your fault.

Your ex is a absolute dick, finding out you've been raped and making you apologize for it?! Block him and don't talk to him any further.

I'm sorry you don't have much in the way of support in RL. If you're in the north west at all I'm happy to accompany you to anywhere you need to go if you need someone.

Goodness, so sorry to hear all the additional difficulties you are facing. Not at all what you need.

Look up Improving Access to Psychological Therapies (IAPT) Its an NHS lead therapy service fo which you can self refer. I only heard of it recently and haven't any experience of it, but it may be useful. Hugs to you.

If you need to talk you could also try the Samaritans - you don't have to be at the point of suicide to ring them (I'm sure being stressed by being raped would be "enough"!!)