“Nicest woman I have ever met”

[Passthebubbly]

This is how my dh described another woman. Would it bother you? It is niggling me!

Well I think that’s a weird thing to say about someone he - presumably - hasn’t known very long.

I might say it about a close family member or other person I’d known for years and years, otherwise you can’t really know someone can you? Says to me that he really thinks highly of her. But do you have any reason to think it’s in an odd way?

Ah cross posted there. Is she a similar age to/younger than him?

@Namelessinseattle

Bingley and Jane were nice. I’d rather be Lizzie and Darcy.

This is such a perfect analogy I love it! Lizzie and Darcy were both tossers at times but bloody hell Bingley and Jane were absolute mood hoovers.

Saraclara - thank you!!!! I needed to hear that.

Do I have a spite side - when pushed to my limit I guess so.

What does she look like - lovely, she is a lovely person and pretty - I can see why he is saying it just wish he hadn’t said it to me.

Feeling sorry for her - why? This is not really about her. It’s about what he said to me
His wife and how it made me feel about myself. I probably just wish I could be more like her.

Odd way - no I have no reason to think this. Just made me feel strange as he has never said this about a woman before.

She is 5 years older than me but looks a lot younger. Very pretty and honestly a lovely person. The irony is she is probably one of the nicest people I have met but just stung me hearing that from him. Duck I am a paranoid twat. Z

It wouldn’t sit right with me, OP.

It's just hyperbole, surely?

Be wary...

Nah wouldn't sit right with me. I take it she is on a probation period? If it were me I'd let her go after her probation period and say it must have been my 'spite side'. If my DP came back and said that I wouldn't be pleased tbh.

No probation period no. We are a very small family business. She is great at her job and has done nothing to warrant us not keeping her on. She is happily married and gives me no reason to think she would ever let us down. This is more about what he said, in probably being stupid just would like to know how he would feel if I said that about another man.

Yes karka probably is. Hope so anyway

Sounds like the startings of mentionitis to me

I said what nicer than me and he said “well you do have a spite side to you” - then back tracked and said we are similar.

This I would not like.

I don't know...I think people, married or not, naturally are sometimes attracted to other people. It's normal...I probably went on a bit too much about a man at my place of work because he was a French artist....tall and handsome to boot.

Doesn't mean I'd act on a bit of a crush.

DH took the piss..."Ooh, it's Pierre!" sort of thing.

I soon got over it...I wouldn't ACT on it. Pierre turned out to be a bit of a nutter anyway.

Both my husband and my male best friend would use this as a way of saying that she is boring. I'm sure neither wou,d describe me as 'nice' but both enjoy my company.

Henny you made me laugh! Thanks. Poor Pierre

That it is not acceptable at all. My dh would never in a million years say something like that to me & expect to live to tell the tale!

I think that can just be a bit of a turn of phrase.

Bubbly good! There's no point getting het up about things...we're only human. I can't imagine caring...my DH has said "oh she's a lovely woman" about people too...just being in a committed relationship can't stop us admiring other humans....

@FairyDust92 You would let an innocent woman lose her job because her boss told his wife that she was nice. Really?

Will they be working closely together

He's either just being a bit tactless but it wasn't meant as a slight to you. Or...is he being a bit passive aggressive knowing it might wind you up? How would he feel if you described a new make colleague in such glowing terms? Personally, I would feel a bit miffed but wouldn't take it too seriously unless such comments became frequent.

*male

If she's only started working for you then I'm sure he'll discover traits he doesn't like. I think he's got a bit of a crush on her, though. Of course if she's as nice as he thinks she is, she'll put him in his place if he tries to step over the line.

Don't give him too hard a time. DP's mother is the nicest woman I've ever met. But she's also very insular, finds Coronation Street intellectually challenging, is completely incapable of understanding why people with depression can't 'just be happy with what they've got' and a sofa cushion is less passive than she is.