Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How should I reply to this text?

999 replies

JaysusWept · 12/09/2019 10:34

Namechanged as I've told my work colleague already about this and I know she lurks on here. (She was absolutely no help - she's probably still laughing about it...)

Background is that I've been single for a couple of years after discovering he was cheating. I have an 8 year old DD.
I am friends with a small group who I have known for a few years - met through kids at nursery/starting school, etc. We do playdates, dinners, drinks out, whatsapp group which is used constantly, helping each other out, etc. We are close and I value all of their friendships.
For the past few weeks I have felt that one of the group, who I shall refer to as C, has been a bit 'off' with me. Nothing I can really put my finger on - I don't always do the drop off and pick ups at school for my DD, but when I have and I've seen C she hasn't chatted with me like she usually would, and 2 weeks ago 4 of us went out for drinks and I felt that there was a bit of an atmosphere when I was talking to her, although she was polite enough. There are people that I am closer to in the group but C and I have always been very friendly and have done many things with just the 2 of us.

Yesterday, I picked up my DD from school and C's husband was there to pick up their DD. The 4 of us walked back together and we stopped outside C's house to finish our chat briefly, before I carried on up the street. C came to the door but didn't come over although she did wave.

At 4pm I received a text from C which read "Doing her usual, all over XXXXX (her husband's name) and doing that stupid fucking laugh of hers" with a couple of angry emoticons.
I replied back "?" and she immediately sent back "Ooops, sorry! That was meant for L (mutual friend in group, but who is very close to C), talking about someone at work! Sorry, just delete!"
I didn't reply to that and almost straight after I received a text from L asking if I was up for a night out next weekend.

C was talking about me, wasn't she? L also wouldn't usually text me about a night out as it would be sent through the whatsapp chat.
I didn't do the drop off this morning, but C has text me (not in whatsapp group) to ask if I fancy going over to hers tomorrow after school with DD.
I'm not sure how best to respond.
Am I being paranoid in thinking that text was about me?

For the record, I don't know C's husband particularly well. I've chatted with him at group things we've attended and a few times we've walked home together if we've done school pick ups as I've got to pass their house on my way home. I am not attracted to him, and nothing untoward has ever happened or would happen, although I may very well have a stupid fucking laugh!

Any advice? I actually feel really fucking weirded out by this.

OP posts:
WhatIsThis1 · 17/09/2019 16:16

That is brilliant, well done for saying something! Would love to be a fly in the wall when he asks her what it's all about. It's great M was there as a witness, karma heading Cunts way!

AryaStarkWolf · 17/09/2019 16:17

Ohhh that is amazing, best result ever, I knew confronting the Dh was the best way forward. So that means that C & L probably made this story up to cover for their bitching about you? What a pair of nasty cunts

littledinosaurs · 17/09/2019 16:18

Holy shit! YES!!! Actually laughing with relief for you OP

MarshaBradyo · 17/09/2019 16:18

I’m so bloody happy for you

I really thought he wouldn’t know

Well done!

MarshaBradyo · 17/09/2019 16:19

I’m laughing a bit to for you, read it twice as you relayed it so well

Punches air

NewMe2019 · 17/09/2019 16:19

Well done OP. In trying to take you down C has made an absolute twat out of her own husband. I hope he reads her the riot act.

beatriceprior · 17/09/2019 16:21

Well done op 👍🏻. Really well done.

Flossdancing · 17/09/2019 16:22

Brilliant! What a result! So pleased for you op- it couldnt have worked out any better for you! Id sit back now and see what unfolds, if this thread runs out, please make another so you can keep us updated on her demise!! Wicked laugh Grin

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 17/09/2019 16:23

If it’s DH picking up, I would definitely ask him what the fuck was going on and tell him to talk to his wife and clear his shit up as it’s not fair that whatever is it isn’t going on in their marriage is affecting your life

ChevalierTialys · 17/09/2019 16:23

Well done OP!! Fucking excellent work!

Although I think it's extremely likely that you'll be getting a LOT of abuse from C tonight.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 17/09/2019 16:24

Is or isn’t!

combatbarbie · 17/09/2019 16:24

I am so happy for you..... But I would have given him the full story, if he is baffled C can say anything, but now M has heard it for herself I would wait for them to approach you, yes they have been put in an awkward situation but they owe you an apology for doubting and ghosting you.

This will not be the end though..... Friday will be interesting... See where the loyalty lies.

theoriginalmadambee · 17/09/2019 16:24

Congratulations OP. Best outcome possible, but I fear, C will have it in for you even more.

Can't help feeling sorry for the dh, that can't have been fun.

babbydriver · 17/09/2019 16:25

Which just proves that C is indeed batshit! Good on ya @JaysusWept

combatbarbie · 17/09/2019 16:25

And I would have walked home with him!!!! Just for shits and giggles

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 17/09/2019 16:25

Arse! Sorry OP didn’t see your last message.

Well fucking done!👏👏👏

Talkingmouse · 17/09/2019 16:26

This is brilliant. Well done on staying so calm the last couple of days and being the bigger the person. Enjoy the fall out!

magoria · 17/09/2019 16:27

It's a shame that this had to happen for M to believe you.

Never forget that.

saraclara · 17/09/2019 16:28

Yay! And perfect that M witnessed it!

mankyfourthtoe · 17/09/2019 16:28

So proud of you!

JaysusWept · 17/09/2019 16:29

I’m honestly so relieved! And so happy that M was there because even if he does try to change his story after speaking to C, M is my witness.

M has put the details of it on WA. K has said she knew all along I wouldn’t have messaged him Hmm (yet didn’t dig up C on it?)
I’m so relieved but, yes, I think I’ll be viewing my friendship with K, M and D slightly differently after this.
I honestly don’t know what C and L can say to this now. I’ve no idea why she did this, but that friendship is truly over now.

OP posts:
pictish · 17/09/2019 16:31

C will fob him off with some bullshit about you having your wires crossed. Guaranteed. That doesn’t matter though as it’s your friends you need to be understanding, not her dh.
Hopefully your name will be on its way to being completely cleared now.
C is going to be furious. Prepare for messages.

Rayner82 · 17/09/2019 16:31

YESSS OP!!!! 💪🏽💪🏽💪🏽💪🏽💪🏽 So happy for you!!!!!! This is great news!!!!! 💕💕

Now sit back and let it unfold but from now on don't get involved- you have been proved right. You have still uncovered the spineless friends and you can hold your head high and start to find new genuine friendships. Please don't allow M to crawl back after her spinelessness- friendly terms but keep them at arms length and keep wary of them all. You deserve genuine kind friends, not these.

Also, can I just add- what a twat Caroline is for not thinking you'd be brave enough to ask the husband!!! 

AND, also, poor husband. He sounds like a normal bloke. I feel sorry for him.

Yes to being a fly on the wall when he gets home! 

babbydriver · 17/09/2019 16:34

Yeah there will definitely be a "how should I reply to this text part 2"!!

AryaStarkWolf · 17/09/2019 16:35

M has put the details of it on WA. K has said she knew all along I wouldn’t have messaged him hmm (yet didn’t dig up C on it?)

I wouldn't completely rule them out though, I mean unless Caroline has form for being a total psycho, how were they to know who to believe? If you both seemed like normal nice people they must have been totally confused