Dating thread 169: You know that tingly feeling you get when you like someone? That's common sense leaving your body...

[JeSuisPrest]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you. 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

Thread 169 open for business, roll up, roll up...

That sounds fab, onlyme

Hurrah for birthday weekends!! And dates!!

Hi everyone. Can I join? Just started OLD after ending a relationship.

Been chatting to someone for a couple of weeks and met on Saturday. He was keen to meet up again so agreed on this Friday. He's seemed keen and has stayed in touch - lovely messages, telling me lots about himself. Then BAM. Blocked me on whatsapp completely out of the blue today!

What's that about?!?!!?!!! I can't do all of this bollocks again, it's exhausting.

@Pinkdoor welcome! Who knows what's going on with these fuckers! Probably married and got busted! Please remember it's no reflection on you it's all on him! Read the rules about getting a thick skin and remember you are the prize

Well have finally given up on Mr Three - who messages me constantly from 6.00am to 11.00pm every day for 3 weeks but when I said I was alone in a hotel tonight and it was an ideal time to phone and actually SPEAK TO ME LIKE A HUMAN (never mind ask me out), he said he definitely would call, and then didn't. Messaged me right up to 9.30pm, said he'd be home after visiting a friend for coffee, then nothing. He normally always messages right up to when he goes to sleep. So I guess lovely as he seemed, block and delete, right? Maybe he has a squeaky Mickey Mouse voice and is scared it will put me off? . Or more likely just not that into me. Just don't get why bother with the messaging in that case? I mean really, why? Either you're in or out, surely?

Am really not enjoying online dating so far!

@Pinkdoor I hear you, am already exhausted and it's only been 3 weeks.

@Ndotto why didn't you phone him?

I'm so naive @Ginmel, I though a coke nail was for opening a can of Coca Cola when you said it 🙈 , any long nails are grim on a man though. Nice hands and nails are essential.

@onlymebutdifferent Are you sure you want to end things with MrT? He's had an incredibly tough time lately and he must be all over the place. Was he trying to rekindle things or just trying to assuage his own guilt over ending things?

@Pinkdoor My bet would be on married or in a LTR as well. Bloody arseholes.

@JeSuisPrest he ended things not me...the message he sent was not trying to rekindle anything. I know he's been through a really tough time but at the same time that doesn't excuse being an arse. He really hurt me and a little bit of honesty would have prevented that.

Yes, I know he ended things @onlymebutdifferent, I was just wondering if he was thinking he might have made a mistake now the reality of not having you in his life was a reality. Grief does funny things to people, though as you say, he hurt you and you want to move on from that. Fingers crossed with the new irons 🤞🏻

@ndotto @onlymebutdifferent @jesuisprest usually I'd agree and suspect married/LTR and busted but when we met for coffee on Saturday he brought his young tiny daughter along! (Single parent, widowed). I thought it a little odd but actually it was fine and it was only coffee, no funny business. He wouldn't do that if there was a woman about would he?! Baffling

@JeSuisPrest don't get me wrong I'd love to have him back in my life - I miss him terribly but I can't allow anyone to treat me the way he has. He knew he wasn't feeling the same as me and still let me fall deeper and deeper for him. On the Sunday we went to ikea and had a lovely day, we even discussed the future and all the while he knew he wasn't feeling it! I can't get over that at all hence me sending him the poem and I was in his life for one reason and that was to help him during the weeks before, during and just after his mother's funeral. I had things going on too but he wasn't interested in those. I knew he was pulling back from me but he insisted everything was ok. You just don't treat someone you care about like that and you certainly don't ignore them for nearly 12 hours knowing that they would be very worried

@onlymebutdifferent I didn't call him because I guess I knew he didn't want to speak . Normally if I message him he opens it right away and responds at once, for him to not message me since 9.30pm and ignore my subsequent messages to say 'hi I've finished working now are you home?' is uncharacteristic, he's been on WhatsApp since. Just weird, weird behaviour! I have quite a massive crush on him as well from messages and photos, but I'm not 13 years old, am not going to be his penpal for time while he makes his mind up.

@Ndotto so you haven't met this man? That changes things and can see where you're coming from...after 3 weeks Mr T and I had met 3 or 4 times and messaged about 4,000 times

NDotto that’s a shame, hate breadcrumbers such a waste of time!

Khaleesi nails yuk!

Ginmel is MrSmart the one divorcing? Are you sure he isn’t ready?

One good on you for staying strong and positive. You can’t accept that.

Well MrEP still wants the see me but it’s going to be weeks as he’s busy and I’m away with work. Only, the sex wasn’t that good and his messages are really basic (he’s lovely and intelligent in person), so I’m going to get bored...

Doesn’t help I’ve been messaging MrComplicated for the last 3 days non stop for hours again. Now his messages are just great and we bounce off one another... but he’s an ex for a reason

Pinkdoor the same happened to me last week, on date day I just noticed I'd been blocked (thanks to the details on this thread about what WhatsApp looks like when you've been blocked, thanks everyone). My pride took a bit of a dent but I knew what advice I'd get (delete/block/move on) so that's exactly what I did and I was fine after a couple of days.
Boak at the long nails but I laughed like a drain at coke nail being used to open a can!
Date tomorrow with Mr Young. We've been talking since the weekend but I don't want to fall into the overinvestment trap. He seems lovely and a bit mysterious in a good way. Drinks in a nice bar, looking forward to it!

Morning all. Eeeewwwww at long nails let alone "coke nails" 🤮

Spent a lovely morning/afternoon with MrWade yesterday. It just feels so comfortable and easy with him. I've been doing this old malarkey for nearly a year now and despite having been on lots of dates now realise that I wasnt that fussed about any of them whereas I know I actually like this one! When we were lying next to each other yesterday he said "this is going well - do you agree?" And I have to say I certainly do 😊

Happy dance for you @neverexpected2 what a lovely thing to hear from Mr wade

It's funny that I can't remember the second colleague I knew who had a coke nail but I know if/when I remember my stomach is going to drop. He was revolting and I think my brain has kindly made me forget him.

@Ndotto breadcrumbing is very disheartening, especially when there was a period before where they made unusual strong effort and one got used to regular, consistent messages. Although texting very often usually is a red flag for them disappearing later.

I also agree that long nails are disgusting, I can’t stand them, to the point that if MrNN has any white bit showing whatsoever I make him cut it off. The sound of people scratching their skin with their nails makes me feel physically ill.

Talking of MrNN, I haven’t seen him since he got back from Sweden (apart from our slightly awkward run in at the park). I’m not children free until next Saturday which is a bit of a bummer. So I’m taking him to see my old rugby team play against Harlow, stage 2 of curing his liking of football.

Good luck with that Simon, I go to watch rugby occasionally with my dad and watch the internationals, but I'm still a much bigger football fan.
Urrgghhh on the long nails on blokes as well. I've had a bit of a phobia about cutting my nails since I was a little kid. My mum used to have chase me round the house to do them, and I still don't like the feeling now. But I hate the sight of long nails even more.
I'm currently sat at the airport, 2 hour delay, trying to rearrange meetings to squeeze them in before my return flight. Can see me not going at all at this rate, glad I got up at 5am! 😤

So why do men let their nails grow long? My XH did towards the end, I admit I wondered whether he was cross-dressing but I couldn’t be bothered finding out. He had no phobia of nail cutting as far as I know.

I hope your day gets better Ant!

MissTiny has messaged telling me to sack it all off and come and get in bed with her instead, very tempting! 😂

Ex dh hated having long nails but used to spend hours trimming them and always when we needed to go out or I needed help with dc. I would've packed to go on holiday for me and the kids, we would be ready to go (a miracle with young kids) and he would be somewhere trimming his bloody toenails oblivious to the efforts I'd made!