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Original poster

Break up support thread 2

999 replies

Jonsnowsghost · 21/08/2019 21:16

Carrying on the supportive previous thread that ran out of space!
@herbsmokedchicken definitely that, although I wouldn't as I'm not a cheat....

OP posts:
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9
TinselAndKnickers · 05/09/2019 18:45

We had a lovely chat, all day!! A bit of low key flirting but nothing extremeeee and he put kisses on all the messages which he never ever does. Hmmmmmm. Spoke about some plans for the future - nothing huge and not really plans but sort of "you'll have to let me know" or "we can try that" etc. Don't think he wants to get back together and not sure if I do. Didn't speak about any of that. Going to play it cool.

herbsmokedchicken · 05/09/2019 18:48

And how are you feeling now? That’s nice if it’s potentially going to lead to you being friends at least, I would really like to get to the point of being friends with A but I know at the moment I’d be looking for signs in everything and hoping he’d change his mind.

Yeah jonsnow even tho A said he had no plans to date I still keep imagining him being with some one else and makes me feel a bit sick

herbsmokedchicken · 05/09/2019 18:49

It’s making me want to text A now lol but I’m not ready really

Did you have a nice birthday tinsel?

herbsmokedchicken · 05/09/2019 19:26

ok another break up song BUT it is a bop

TinselAndKnickers · 05/09/2019 19:33

I don't know I feel. He's not text today, he text last night like a goodnight text after I sent mine so I didn't reply. I called him half hour ago but only let it ring 2 times and then hung up. He didn't answer and hasn't text or anything so I'll take that as "more space" Blush

Feel like I'm now I'm going to be a crazy bitch. I love him loads!

herbsmokedchicken · 05/09/2019 19:47

Ah I hate that sort of uncertain feeling! Def give more space, you’ll feel shit if you start texting and texting

TinselAndKnickers · 05/09/2019 20:12

I feel awful!!! But also good? It's weird

herbsmokedchicken · 05/09/2019 20:29

Yeah that's how I felt just after we broke up and we went for a spin

ASHMEISTER24 · 05/09/2019 20:41

I'm on week 4 and it's still killing me. 13 years together married for 3. I just don't think I'll ever get over it. I wish she would have an affair it would have made things so much easier. Instead nothing changed she would moan if I was 5 mins late from work. All our spare time was spent together with our girls. If I wanted sex we would have it. No major argument. She would rather stay in and have a film night than go out with her friends. We did bicker and our spark had gone but I just put it down to mid life rut . How i wish I'd have run her a bath every night now and appreciated what I had. She was the love of my life and always will be. We was a bloody good looking couple when we was younger aswell. I've put on too much weight and my lack of confidence affected our relationship in the end. People keep telling me it gets easier but don't know how.

TinselAndKnickers · 05/09/2019 21:33

Texting again. Wish he didn't even wish me happy birthday. I can't stop crying for some reason Sad back to square one

herbsmokedchicken · 05/09/2019 21:42

Oh maybe best to stop texting then? Do you mean mutual texting or you’re texting him and he’s not replying? It’s so hard isn’t it!

TinselAndKnickers · 05/09/2019 22:17

Fuck this

TinselAndKnickers · 05/09/2019 22:36

It's been a mutual conversation and it was nice then he was a dick so I challenged that and it's all come pouring out.

The flood gates have opened. SadSad

herbsmokedchicken · 05/09/2019 22:48

Oh no Sad

TinselAndKnickers · 05/09/2019 23:16

It felt nice to let off some steam, but he kept on saying "right now" and "in future" and stuff so in the end I just said "look, just so we're clear, I don't want to be with you. I love you and will always care, but I'm done. Good night"

Killed me but feeling stronger Grin will cry myself to sleep and party the weekend away.

ASHMEISTER24 · 05/09/2019 23:32

You need to leave it. I'm in the same boat texting constantly but it gets us nowhere. If they miss you they miss you. I unfortunately can't cut contact because we have kids. I go two days without talking and I start feeling positive about my future. As soon as i see her I justvwanna hold her and it all comes back to the front of my mind.

herbsmokedchicken · 06/09/2019 07:13

But at least you are feeling stronger! And you have the weekend to wallow and/or party!

ashmeister must be very hard, I do feel sorry for those on this thread who have no choice but to see or speak to their ex

Had another stupid dream! Forgotten it a bit now, but:

Dreamed we were in my kitchen kissing and being affectionate, I pulled away and was like we shouldn’t do this we are broken up. I thought he was gonna be like ok let’s get back together but he was just like oh yeah you’re right or something like that, luckily I can’t quite remember it now. Horrible tho cos it feels so natural and familiar. Suppose it’s my brain helping me process it.

Mumcomehere · 06/09/2019 07:14

I'm still feeling a little stronger, I just need to keep it up now, I really dont want to go backwards at this stage.

How is everyone else doing?

herbsmokedchicken · 06/09/2019 07:26

I’m feeling better today than the last couple of days, back to just generally feeling a bit low and sad.

herbsmokedchicken · 06/09/2019 11:09

How are you today @TinselAndKnickers?

Mumcomehere · 06/09/2019 15:38

Do you think as there are less messages on here daily, that people are moving forward?

herbsmokedchicken · 06/09/2019 16:11

Hopefully! We have lost a few people and I hope they’re doing well.

herbsmokedchicken · 06/09/2019 17:36

Can hear a pub playing “I want you back”, life taking the piss

Bebe03 · 06/09/2019 20:37

Oh dear can I crawl back on here for advice?

Basically I was feeling a million times better after he said he didn't want to be with me, after months of delibartion by him whilst we were living together.

He then got back in touch after four weeks saying he regrets it, recognises he has commitment issues and has promised counselling etc. Said he needs sometime so we agreed begining of October and to see eachother inbetween now and again. But he isn't making the effort of texting me back, setting dates on when to see me (he always has trouble making plans)

He's adamant it'll work and he just needs support to make sure we don't fall into the same trap but in the interim I'm so miserable, he doesn't have much empathy for me and doesn't show lots of love when I don't see him.

Have I just foolishly put myself back into the same position he kept me in for months!? Or is it worth bearing the pain? I feel so confused, hurt and unloved but I don't know if I just need to wait to see how it works out in October?

PuffinSock · 06/09/2019 20:43

@TinselAndKnickers that sounds really hard ☹ it seemed so hopeful with all the texts yesterday but now seems hard again, are you planning NC for now?

@Jonsnowsghost I agree, its horrible to think of them with someone else. It feels like you want them back but actually they've chosen someone else ☹ I'm finding it has really hit my confidence, I just feel like I will never find mutual love.

Mine hasn't messaged for a few days. I'm NC but he still sends a message every few days. Last one I replied with an innocent pic of my on a girls weekend 😉 he seemed a bit bothered that I might meet someone, haha well I take that as positive that hes bothered.

Happy weekend everyone!