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Original poster

Would you ask them to go out for a 3rd time?

143 replies

upupupandaways · 02/08/2019 09:28

They want to keep it casual,don't like you pressuring them.
Have asked them out two weekends running and they said no.
Since then they've text you all day every day,been really flirty,dropped hints about meeting up but haven't asked you.
Now it's the weekend again and nothing.
Would you ask for the 3rd time?
Or leave it up to them and save your self respect and dignity?
Then if nothing by next weekend just mentally draw a line under it and find someone who actually wants the same as you?

OP posts:
Original poster
upupupandaways · 02/08/2019 13:33

@AnyFucker what does negging mean?
Is that like playing with you ?

OP posts:
StormTreader · 02/08/2019 13:35

"I've just had an offer to have them bought for me, that sounds like a much better deal to me!"

He won't be able to reply fast enough to try and find out who else is in the game. He's enjoying getting the attention and thinks you're waiting for him, you need to show him you're not bothered.

user1471504234 · 02/08/2019 13:43

....which is exactly what he wanted you to think! He’s messing with you and it’s cruel. Don’t let him continue.

user1471504234 · 02/08/2019 13:44

Oops, my post above is in response to OP saying she got a little excited when she thought he was asking her out

latexsalesman · 02/08/2019 13:45

He's mind fucking you and trying to get you to chase him. It's entertaining for him. He's a douche.

Next time he texts

'New phone who dis?'

Then block.

DarklyDreamingDexter · 02/08/2019 13:45

Yeah, what Stormtrader said. Was just going to suggest something very similar, just to take him down a peg or two. Make out you've had a better offer from a hot date.....Then bin him off completely. Block him. Who needs someone messing with your head like that? He's clearly not interested in anything more than stringing you along as an ego boost, so he's not relationship material.

Yes, negging is like playing with you, in a nasty, belittling way. Google it for a fuller explanation! Ditch him now and stop playing his twattish game.

RonnieScotts · 02/08/2019 13:49

He's a dickhead and is negging you (google it) he's a bit of a cruel game player, but you're lucky he's shown his true colours early.

I'd go out for drinks with your friends anyway. Don't reply to him tonight then text in the morning 'so sorry I didn't get back to you, was out for drinks last night, had an amazing night but a bit of a sore head this morning!' (Or something similarly upbeat yet dismissive) then lose his number and fidget all about him.

LazyLizzy · 02/08/2019 13:50

He replied ...get yourself a drink.

OP this is embarrassing, don't be desperate. Fuck him off.

Tiddlybups · 02/08/2019 13:52

I’d just block him and not try to be clever or have the last word or get one over him - he’s a manipulative person who is enjoying the drama so you can’t “win” here.

AnneKipanki · 02/08/2019 13:54

Have you actually been out before ?

AnyFucker · 02/08/2019 13:55

negging

AnneKipanki · 02/08/2019 13:56

Block.

VanGoghsDog · 02/08/2019 13:57

Who is this person, what is the background?

Original poster
upupupandaways · 02/08/2019 13:59

Yeah we've been out about 9 times now.
Speak all day every day so it's confusing me.

OP posts:
DarklyDreamingDexter · 02/08/2019 14:05

Don't be confused! It's clear to everyone else that he's a pisstaking twat. "Get yourself a drink" indeed! Seriously, just stop dancing to his tune, stop replying to his texts. As someone else said, it's getting really embarrassing. He's wasting your time.

Michaelbaubles · 02/08/2019 14:08

You’ve been on nine dates? By that point you should be reasonably able to expect a date every weekend (or whatever suits your timetable) and that you were going to meet up within a few dates without having to make a massive deal of it.

You’re his fallback. I’d just phase him out. Dumping him will give him satisfaction so I’d just keep being vague and live my own life.

hadthesnip2 · 02/08/2019 14:14

I'm assuming he's early 20's. Sounds like he's part of a lads group & they get off on trying to see who's "bird" will play their game.

You 2 are not on the same page. Find someone who actually wants to date & be part of a couple. This bloke is still wanting to be with his mates (nothing wrong with that) but he's not for you.

Original poster
upupupandaways · 02/08/2019 14:22

He is mid 30s Confused

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 02/08/2019 14:26

Oh for God's sake. What are you doing. Hanging about waiting for this twat. He knew exactly what he was doing with that text, prob found it funny.

Seriously block it and move on.

AnneKipanki · 02/08/2019 14:26

How old are you OP ?

Original poster
upupupandaways · 02/08/2019 14:33

@AnneKipanki I'm 34

OP posts:
RadioSpice · 02/08/2019 14:39

Move on OP.

AnneKipanki · 02/08/2019 14:58

Definitely do not hang around waiting for him . Make your own plans for tonight or the weekend . You are more interested in him .He is not that interested in you .

As for that comment about the drinks ....did he think that was funny ?

You are both in your 30s. Time is more important for YOU if you want to have a family.

GoGoGoGoGo · 02/08/2019 15:06

OP just stop, really.

FinallyHere · 02/08/2019 15:22

He's doing my head in

Do yourself a favour, just stop answering

Block him and work on your self esteem

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