Break up support thread

[TinselAndKnickers]

Anyone else going through a breakup?

I'm a week into it. It was nearly 4 years together and it's ended because we lost communication and we just can't do it anymore, it's not the right time. He's said never say never and we've done the stuff swap over so I know I have to accept it and move on. But we love each other and have a lot of respect, so the goodbye was very hard to do. We might reconnect in future but for now we're NC.

Anyone else want a pity party/support thread?

Did you post it to her or to him to pass on? I think that’s good tho, if it was a few months down the line and you were in a better place then it might be different but direct contact is best avoided for now i reckon.

I hadn’t bought A’s birthday presents yet but I’d got him some stuff when I was away, some t shirts and they are mine now! And I think when I’m ready to pick the blanket up, I will donate it. Altho it’s going to take months yet so by the time it’s done maybe I’ll want him to have it.

They both live at home still so I sent it to their house, addressed to her! He knew I'd bought the gift so if he thinks it's weird I sent it, I'm not bothered!

Yep keep them for yourself

I'm posting the festival tickets to my ex, just stuck a card in with them that says "enjoy". I bet he's probably bought some more (in which case good as I can be sent them back and I can go!) But I dont want to text him to say I'm sending them or anything, I don't want to be hurt by not getting a response so just thought I'd send them off. Then it's not really like contacting him.

Probably the wrong thing to do but right now I'm not bothered, I miss him and want him to know I'm at least thinking of him (and being nice)

jonsnow I don’t think there’s any harm in something like that, it’s friendly but dignified still, not like you blew your nose on them or sent them ripped up or something!

I'm firmly in the camp of "I want him back" but I don't think there's any way he will ever want me bloody typical.

I wish it had all been some ghastly misunderstanding and that the things he said had only been spur of the moment nastiness and that he didn't mean them. I wish he'd call and say he misses me and he's sorry.
But it's not going to happen.
It's affecting my work. The last thing I need is that.

Ha ha should have burnt them and sent the ashes 😅
I do want to go but imagine bumping into them in the middle of Reading 🙄 I think the tickets sold out last month, depends if he thought about it or his brain was too addled with his new relationship 🙄🙄🙄🙄

brokenhearted I appreciate you’re not ready to hear this now but from what you’ve said, I really do think you will look back and be glad you are out of it. I realise you can’t just turn your feelings off though. Just stay strong!

tinsel I want A back so much but I know him and I know his mind is made up! and even if he did change his mind, I don’t think he would say anything so he didn’t mess me around or hurt me more. Maybe if we strike up a friendship again we will reignite but I’m not going to attempt to be friends until I’ve stopped crying over him! Do hope we can at least be friends.

jonsnow yeah that would be rather awks! And painful.

I had to leave work early. I cannot function.

The last few weeks I have had telephone support through my company. Its been helpful but today's call has sent me to rock bottom.
I need closure. I need answers. The way he did it via email has messed with my head so much. As much as I know he was a shitty partner and treated me appallingly I feel stuck in this hell because I never got my say. I never got to see his twat face when he said its over.

I can't call or text as I deleted his number and if I send an email he will ignore it.

I am thinking of just going to his house getting my answers then it's done and I can get off this fucking carousel and move on.

It's a stupid idea I know but I don't have anyone to talk me out of it

DO NOT DO IT!

Closure is a scam, he's a cunt, there's your answer.

Sorry for tough love but we are here to talk each other out of stupid decisions!

Ha ha don't apologise tough love is good.

I don't think closure is a scam.
I have been dumped before and being able to ask why helped me move on. Its the way my brain works.

I may not go. I have these crazy ideas but after a few hours the rational side of my brain kicks in.

Exactly the same here. Not really doing that well at work. Just sat in my car wondering what the hell to do. Feel sad and shit. Just wanna cry. Can’t keep telling my friends, I don’t want them getting sick of me and don’t want this group to get sick of me either haha.
Haven’t eaten for 2 days so maybe that’s why I feel shit. Feeling lost and alone x

Pittle this group will not get sick of you!!!
Here is the only place I get can get rid of the thoughts in my head. We are here to listen and help each other.

Please try and eat though. I have dropped 2 stone in 4 weeks and I am eating so little I fainted last week in my kitchen. I know its so hard to even think about food but don't end up where you collapse like me and wake up with your head in the kitchen bin 😂😂

Oh herbs I know you are right. I need to concentrate on fixing me to move forward. I could get back at him but I could be endangering myself. I have a feeling that OW/EA is probably a sweet little thing with a sob story who'll end up being nothing but a pile of drama for him.

Pittle, tell us on here not your RL friends. Because on here, you can preview before posting and say things that you might not be able to get away with in RL and friends can let you down.

You must eat something - try something nutritious and easy to digest or just whatever you've got in.
Penny, you too.

You have to eat, I stopped eating until I was being observed at work (without my knowledge!) As they thought I was going to collapse on them. I have built it up slowly and currently eating lunch and dinner although they are still not big portions.

I'm just so very miserable, I can't pull myself out of it. Really bad.

Yes try and eat! Altho my normal standard of emotional eating is coming back so I’m trying not to eat too much!

Well it’s 5 o clock and I have not cried. Eyes welled up a couple of times, but no crying. A record!

Doesn’t mean I feel happy obvs but hey, it’s an improvement

Well I am still at home and have not gone to his. I won't lie the urge is massive but if I can hold off till 8pm I know I won't go.

I feel so out of control of my emotions and I hate it. Normally I am calm and measured but this has messed me up big time.

Be strong, you can do it!

Let me clarify, by “you can do it” I mean stay at home not storm round there lol

Ha ha I don't have the energy to storm anywhere herb 🤣🤣

The urge is still strong but I am trying to distract myself.

Thank you means a lot 😊 have eaten something.
Got to take some post to his brothers house later on this evening. Really don’t want to and I’ll probably wear a balaclava and a ninja suit lol
But need to tell him to change his address now.

Post and run Pittal 😂🏃🏃🏃