What is going on with my coworker?

[FloMo98]

I had a lunch meeting with my coworker who's married. We both sat down across from each other and I noticed that he started tugging on the collar of his shirt for a few seconds. Then, he started touching his face. He started rubbing his mouth area and the sides of his face with his hand throughout the start of our conversation.

Soon after, he started copying my actions. I hand my elbow on the table with the tips of my fingers rested against my lips and soon after he did that same position that I was in. Or if I were to shrug my shoulder while talking to him, he'd shrug his shoulder right after me while he'd be listening.

Since we know each other well, this coworker of mine would usually give me a friendly hug and I'd accept it. Most of the time after he starts talking to me after the hug, his voice would get a little shaky while speaking. But this time before I left, he stuck out his hand for a handshake and I shook it. He's never done that to me before.

Why did he do that?

for you

@brownbear1 of course..if he was single no one would have an issue.
He’s not though is he? And she’s fully aware of it. I don’t think it’s cruel to tell someone to back off a married man and stop acting like a lovestruck teenager over someone who’s unavailable.

Thanks, Kennehora. I look forward to trembling!
Weirdly enough a volcanologist has just appeared on my dating app.

Holy shit.
It's fate, isn't it?
What if he looks at me?
OMG I totes see me having to start a thread just like this!

if he was single everyone would be egging her on

Yes, but he's married!

Jesus, at what age do you need to be taught not to chase after married men?

Dear OP,

He clearly loves you. Pursue him, get married when he's divorced the poor sap he's with now who just isn't as good as you.

Spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder wondering when he's going to do to you what he did to her. Oh,but of course, you are a fairytale, and he wouldn't!

Alternatively, he was hot and hungover. I'd choose to believe that if I were you.

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy

Some people learn this from day one, some people are 60 and are still cheating.

These things do happen and not everything is so black and white.

If I had a partner who felt this way about someone else, it have to look long and hard at our relationship. Maybe I wasn't giving him what he needed, maybe they weren't happy and maybe I would be happier with someone who's truly only has eyes for me. It's better to move on with that understanding.

No one wants to be the reject but sometimes people are just better suited to each other.

The OP hasn't fucked him or been sexually intimate with him...yet you may argue but it's an important distinction.

Doesn't seem like she's chasing him either, she likes him, he likes her they both know it.

The fact you guys have belittled her and stated that it must be due to her age is not fair. Older people do plenty of dumb shit.

I have to say I have been married to a man that cheated and we separated and it hurt our children deeply. Does he have children? If yes then please think of them and stop giving this anymore of your time.

When OP described the tugging on the collar was anyone else picturing that scene from Star Wars?

Is the the limerance troll? Tedious. If real, get your shit together. If not, bugger off.

I would warn someone off anyone saying "warm weather such as today" regardless of their marital status. Who is he, Jacob Rees Mogg? Although actually it doesnt quite make sense so maybe barking up the wrong tree there

Yeah this is the limerance troll.

Exactly the same tone of writing and turns of phrase.

Either someone who has difficulties understanding relationships IRL or someone who gets off on this kinda thing. Or someone sad and lonely at home.

Whichever one, it's sad!

What's the history of the limerance troll?

Ongoing troll who has been posting these type threads forever.

Doesn't listen to anything anyone negative has to say ie- he doesn't fancy you and continues to drip feed and protest theres nothing going on but they like each other.

Then adds a bit more in and disappears for days or a week then comes back under 59 million usernames.

There’s probably some poor bloke in an office somewhere who’s living this awful nightmare. The person who posts these threads needs psychiatric assessment.

How come everyone but me has these exciting office exchanges?

My last office lunch consisted of bitching about the Boss and how long our food was taking to arrive.

I’m returning to this thread 🙋🏻‍♀️ , I have some groundbreaking insight to offer OP! I’m invested in this office “dalliance” but after weighing up the collar pulling and face touching against the hand shake I really think it’s only a friendship , the deciding factor for me was that he only compared you to warm English weather , we all know that our weather is shite. If he had compared you to the scorching hot rays of the Sahara then I think you would be right to read more into this.

Sounded a little like trying to hide an anxiety attack to me. I've done some strange things when I've been deeply uncomfortable.
Do the sanctity of marriage justice, and stay away from this person, and ask him the same.

It's not everyone but you @SecretWitch

It's the same person posting the same post over and over again!!