Overthinking? No response from date

[Splendidsun]

Would appreciate some advice, met a guy from Match, three excellent dates, coffee, drinks and dinner, third date at mine and dtd...this was last Saturday. Messaging and chatting every day.

Date set up for tomorrow, I messaged at lunch to confirm via WA and no response. Message has been delivered and not read. First guy in four months of dating that I really like. Should I just assume for whatever reason he isn't interested now?

I know I mustn't message again but it is hard, thinking how could he have changed his mind about me in one afternoon plus if he has I find it rude that he hasn't messaged me to tell me. Keep checking my phone, this is crazy, I am a grown woman of 46! TIA for sane advice.

I don't think it sounds that bad. If the last messages were saying how excited you both are. Wait and see. Perhaps next message he will suggest a location for your date.

Thank you again for messages. I am genuinely appreciative. RL friends are all married and think I'm just having fun, feel embarrassed to tell them how horribly lonely I am ... at times.

OP if you usually text more and Thais is unusual I would definitely text someone before I went to bed simply to check they were alright! But that’s just me. You know if it’s out of ordinary and whether that would appear clingy in the context.

I think if he had read the message and not responded that I would know it was game over.

The message hasn't been read so there is a chance he is busy / phone died.....I know I'm clutching at straws!!!

I think people underestimate how lonely it is at times as a single parent.
I would text at bedtime if you havent heard. Just a simple 'Hope you're ok, night night' kind of thing.

I know how easy it is to over think these things.

Keep us posted!

Im going to guess phone has died! Fingers crossed

Feeling rejected definitely heightens feelings of loneliness. Have yourself a nice chilled evening, assume nothing. Very likely he's just fallen asleep on the sofa or something. And if he's changed his mind so suddenly, there will be someone else for you.

I’d do the hope you’re ok message like the above poster suggests. Try not to over think it...if he’s playing games or not serious about you then it’s better you know. Hopefully he will text shortly.

I reckon he’s busy, phone has died, left phone at home, something like that.

I've just reentered this world too OP - and it's frustrating how little things change even with age isn't it?! I've spent yesterday exchanging texts with a guy I met on sat night then today he let me down gently by text. It's so hard isn't It? And the loneliness is crippling at times

I reckon his phone has died though and I'll cross my fingers for you.

Just read our chain of messages, he was so enthusiastic...

He still hasn't read my message and I have been on WA and he hasn't been online.

Will hide phone till 10.15pm.

For some reason I think there may still be hope!!!

If not ... well hey ho I will try again. Love MN ... makes me feel I'm not alone here on the sofa feeling a bit sad. Thank you.

He’s dtd , I fear you’re just another notch on his bedpost.

Op try not to worry, that's not that long. Today my phone just went off because I it wasn't charging when I thought it was. Could be anything.

IME it never ends well once contact starts to dry up - it's always a sign they've lost interest. But then I tend to date cunts (not intentionally!) so I may be wrong.

But on WA he can 'read' the message as it flashes up without clicking on it so he may well be choosing not to engage. Sorry but I'm with the minority here and think he's changed his mind. How was the sex?

You're definitely not alone op.
Look forward to update.

What was his last seen time? His phone could have died or he could have left at work and then gone to his evening stuff?
I know how you feel as been there many times but it would be very odd to be so normal all day then go wierd, normally it goes slow over a few days x

Any luck? I suspect you'll hear from him tomorrow as it may be late Itd be really nasty for him to just blank you after messaging enthusiastically

Was he at work today, then gone somewhere straight from work? I wouldn't give up hope yet as he might have had something planned. But I wouldn't text him again. The ball is already in his court so there's no need.

Possibly left phone at work?? I've done this on numerous occasions. If it turns out he has ghosted you then think of it as a luck escape - decent blokes would generally at least text to let you down gently

My guess is he will message in the morning/lunchtime tomorrow to confirm arrangements for that evening

Message still not read. Off to sleep now. Will of course update if anything changes. Thank you for being there x

@splendidsun

Do you have any DC? If not, how have you found his approach to single parenting. It's just got me thinking about a man I dated with kids.

I've turned off all the WhatsApp things that show last online / blue tick for read etc So liberating & stops me stressing! People get busy / battery dies etc, all sorts of reasons you don't hear back straight away, but WA used to really ramp up the stress!

If he's not read the message he's either lost his phone or left it somewhere (more likely if he's not actually been on WhatsApp for a while) or he's decided to ghost you.
Do NOT send him another message. If he's left his phone then it won't make him respond quicker and if he's ghosted you then it's too sad.
Is he usually on WhatsApp regularly? Some people go days between going on and some no less than an hour depending on how prolific they are at texting.