Would you be with someone who says being gay is unnatural?

[joliejoleen]

This man that I've been seeing thinks that being gay is unnatural. He wouldn't go out in the street and protest against gay people or ever attack them. He just thinks that being gay is unnatural and doesn't want his children to grow up thinking being gay is okay because it isn't. Would you ltb?

Thatd be a deal breaker for me. Definitely

No way. I couldn't be with someone whose beliefs and values were so opposite to mine.

‘doesn't want his children to grow up thinking being gay is okay because it isnt’

Do you really need to ask?

He is homophobic if he thinks that though. It is natural to gay people, to be gay. You don't choose a sexual orientation, it's given by nature.

No, I couldn’t be with anyone that was thick enough to think like this.

Being an ignorant bigot isn't normal, don't bother with him, would you really want children with this man, poor kids.

No way.

I'd feel we had completely different outlooks and values. And I would worry about his ethics in general.

It's 2019. No excuses for being homophobic these days, regardless of religion / background.

No way.

'I'm not a homophobe but...'. He's a cliché. How can you take his shit seriously? Homosexuality IS natural. He just doesn't like it. That's the definition of homophobia. Sayonara.

I would Ltb. Imagine being one of his children, growing up with a bigot as a father. Also, I would be wondering what else he doesn’t consider ‘natural’ - being dyslexic? Having a mental illness? A physical disability?

It would be a deal breaker for me. I have friends who are lesbian and l would feel l couldn’t introduce them.

Him: 'Hello, I'm a bigot!'
You: 'I don't want a relationship with a bigot'
Him: 'Well, you're unreasonable'

You're not unreasonable. He is. And he's a bigot.

I had this problem with my dh, many years into being married. It had never occurred to me that he would feel this way. He didn't say that it was unnatural but that 'none of my children will be gay' and that he wouldn't be happy if they were. He did over time slowly adjust his view following some persuasion, which is just as well as one of our dc is gay.
But that 'stance' along with a few other things, has made our relationship less strong than it was.

You’re not unreasonable OP. You can end a relationship for ANY reason or none, but rejecting deep-rooted homophobia is a fine reason. And as an aside anyone who thinks “but I wouldn’t attack someone” is some kind of good point rather than just basic humanity is questionable whatever their particular issue.

Dump and move on! Sorry this one turned out to be such a loser.

I would imagine his dodgy opinions aren't confined to gay people, but that on its own would put me off him.

I had this with a man who I was dating and he claimed being gay wasn’t what God meant us to do. Otherwise he looked perfectly liberal.

I didn’t fancy that as the standard for the relationship and it ended shortly after.

It normally denotes someone with other regressive views...

He's sounds thick at best , nasty bigot at worse.

Urgh....he’s horrible. I’d find it hard to look at him

Of course he's homophobic. I'd be running away... Fast!

@SimonJT

"If being gay was a choice no one would be gay"

Seriously, WTAF?

@NottonightJosepheen

Why would anyone choose to be something that leads to being bullied at school, puts you at risk of losing your family and friends, leads to an increased chance of poor mental health, being shouted at, spat at or beaten up for simply holding someones hand in public?

Also, he is entitled to his opinion. You are entitled to your opinion of his opinion, and to act according to your opinion of his opinion. He doesn't have to agree with it or approve of it.

I would and have stayed with a man like that

Wouldn't stay with, or date someone that bigoted and idiotic in a million years, no OP, let alone have kids with one, or let him be around any. It reflects very poorly on his thought processes and him as a person, I couldn't even begin to find him attractive if I tried. Don't allow him to normalise this for you OP, it's not a case of 'differing' opinions, he's homophobic.