Partner went mad at me because I told him he should tell the DVLA

[ElektraLOL]

That he has MS. He told me he had it when we first met. The other day he told me that he won't tell the DVLA he has it because it will affect his insurance. He generally doesn't tell anyone he has it. I told him he should tell the DVLA because otherwise he could get into trouble if he were to have an accident.

He started telling me to shut up and said I'm threatening him! I'm not - I'm just telling him to cover himself. He then said that he doesn't have it because he doesn't have an official diagnosis. So why tell me he has it then?

He sounds nasty. Does he definitely have it?

What the hell is MS without an official diagnosis? I call bullshit. If he does have it, he could be in a world of trouble with insurers, DVLA and possibly employers (because of their insurance) if he chooses not to disclose.
Even leaving that aside, shouting at you for a reasonable suggestion really isn't on.

Telling the DVLA won't affect his insurance. They deal with licensing.

If he has been diagnosed his insurance will be invalid.
If he hasn't been diagnosed then I would wonder if he has been lying to you all along. How would he know he has MS without a diagnosis?

I have no idea. He has told me he collapsed about 16 years ago and he was found to have lesions on his brain and nerve damage. He said he had MS but is now saying that because he has 8 lesions and not 12 he doesn't have it.

If he has been diagnosed his insurance will be invalid.

Will it?

I was just suggesting that he should cover himself instead of opening himself up to a fine.

He went mad and said I was threatening to report him - I wasn't in any way! It's his life.

All sounds very odd, has he had a further scan to say the lesions have reduced?? I'd be encouraging him for his official 'diagnosis'.

"The other day he told me that he won't tell the DVLA he has it because it will affect his insurance."
Of course it affects his insurance - it invalidates it! If he's in an accident the insurance company will rub their hands with glee because they are completely off the hook because their customer LIED to them. Lying by omission - not telling them something they need to know - is still lying.

"He then said that he doesn't have it because he doesn't have an official diagnosis."
Bollocks. If you haver MS, you have a diagnosis.

He's a liar. He's either lying about not having MS, or he's lying about having it. Either way - do you want to be with a liar?

Balls. If he had ms, he’d have support and appointments in place. Unpleasant twat.

"It's his life."
And the life of anyone he hits.

16 years ago?! Has he had symptoms since? Ms tends to be progressive...

He does have symptoms but he ignores them. It affects his vision and he can be clumsy and drop things but it doesn't affect his walking. He gets very tired.The doctor apparently said years ago that he should try meds and he said no. I think he does have relapses and during those times he has to be off work due to exhaustion. But if he has a relapse he blames it on ridiculous things like it must be a spirit in his house 🤔

Is he claiming benefits due to this imaginary ms?

No, he would never claim anything. No matter how bad his symptoms became. He's in denial you see.

I have seen a letter from his consultant about the lesions

Is this going to be drip drip drip?
Started off with MS, that he might not have, that is untreated, is caused by a spirit??
This guy sounds like a manipulative liar.

A spirit in his house? What planet is he on?

I think I've covered it all now book

You are meant to inform the DVLA of any number of illnesses that may affect your ability to drive.
You also have to inform your insurance company. It won't necessarily increase premiums though.

If I was you I would be checking how authentic this letter is, surely this all looks off to you? Does he work? Is he active?

A spirit in his house?

I hope that spirit spirits you away from him. He sounds really awful. He says he has a terrible life limiting illness yet won't seek help. He drives his car with actually no insurance at all - he's paying out but if he has an accident then he isn't covered because he hasn't been truthful. And they will find out - he's mad if he thinks they won't.

Yes I did tell him this. Why would he think I was threatening to report him? He was ridiculously defensive.

Yes he thinks they won't find out.

He does work but he often has to go off sick. His employer does not know the real
Reason - he says it's stress