Dating thread 153- The adventures of... [Title edited at OP's request]

[30somethingandsingle]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

Link to previous thread:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3543468-dating-thread-152-onwards-and-upwards

Hahaha @BatshitCrazyWoman we are most def not swiping the same guys! So there's your answer....be yourself on profile!!

Ha! Peanut we definitely aren't.

I woke up to 9 messages on POF. Most of them variations on 'hi gorgeous!, one 'how's you' and one 'Oh yes, I'll have you'. Honestly, I despair ...!

It's not freecycle ffs
'yes please'

What next, 'mine'?

😂 WarIs

Am not currently swiping (at least, not with intent, only for curiosity) as I'm waiting to see how things go at the weekend with Mr Far.
He's respectful but a bit filthy, and very much on same wavelength banter wise which is very promising.

And we are each others type. So

That sounds really promising - particularly the 'respectful but a bit filthy' bit! I really hope it works out.

If it doesn't, it doesn't. I'm not overinvested(yet). And I get decent matches. Most importantly though he's quick on the uptake, and he knows most of the 'cons' but still wants to meet. He knows what I actually look like and we've spoken on the phone several times now. So it feels a bit less imaginary than previous ones iykwim.

I would love respectful and filthy 😂😂. My swiping right to everyone last night wasn't actually a complete fail. Fun as well. Talking to 3 guys now who I probably would've swiped left to and actually enjoying all 3 chats 👍.

HairyArsedMan that's a great height. I'm sure you'll be more popular with that in your profile. I'm 5ft 4 so would probably be rejected by someone that tall.

I like men in suits. What I don't like on profiles is men who are scruffy. To me there's a difference between casual and scruffy and I was surprised when I first signed up how many scruffy men there were given they were selling themselves. How hard is it to brush your hair or put on a black t-shirt that isn't obviously faded? Maybe I'm picky on that, I'm not sure.

I also don't mind a long profile, if it contains paragraphs and good grammar and punctuation, as it suggests a thoughtful intelligent man who's opening gambit wouldn't be 'Hi babe, what you up to?'

yes pleas batshit
Will pm you the link

So my first day on Tinder went OK. I'm getting over my hangup about having my profile on view all the time - I didn't realise there has to be a mutual swipe to be able to chat 😳.

How does it work with contacting matches - who messages first? A few messaged me but I've got some where they've not sent a message. Am I supposed to do it? Do they expire/drop off? Is there an etiquette?

MrSmiley from last night 🙈. It was all on the Tinder app, not WhatsApp. He's not messaged me today. Yet. But I'm going to tell him to calm down a bit and stop calling me babe(!) as soon as they say it I normally send back "Babe? 😂" and they stop. I'll do it the next time he says it.

I've not heard from MrStone since yesterday lunch time and he was online all evening on POF so I'm assuming he's realised he's not getting into my knickers on date 2 next week and he's preparing a back plan.

Honestly, knowing I've got MrPlumber (even with the head/heart fuckery that it's bringing) available for my FB needs has really made me be a lot less bothered about ghosting/general weirdness and my attitude is very much it's their loss not mine.

MrBridge messaged me this morning wishing me a lovely holiday so although we can't meet for a couple of weeks, I'm hoping he doesn't slow fade, but if he does 🤷‍♀️

I'll catch up with the thread now...

Ha ha ha shitwithsugaron that made me laugh and actually took me ages to read. I guess these guys must have some success with women or they wouldn't do it but I wouldn't like a man that uses text speak like cum.

Maybe the only women who come on this thread are super fussy (which is why we're single) and there's a whole load of women who love hearing 'babe, you so are so gawgus, you are the woman I hav been looking 4' I have never met anyone in real life who has done online dating so this thread is my only view of it.

My tinder profile is rude but also says my height so I also make a joke about being short. I'm still getting plenty of matches and a few funny messages about reaching top of cupboards and height with or without shoes 😂.

I message first on the ones I really like the look of. If after a few weeks neither has messaged I just unmatch as I find it overwhelming having too many matches 😂.

Well last week I told all my new irons I was out of the dating game for a week or 2 to deal with some personal stuff. It’s really kind of helped me put them in order as have never met them

Mr Irish replies “hope you’re ok, no pressure get in touch when your sorted” perfect

Mr Senior. Said more or less the same but keeps sending me nice respectful and funny messages.

Mr Muscle who was my front runner is been a twat. When can he see me, he changed his plans for me, can he come round, he is horny etc- not a chance mate

Just got the most forward message on tinder ever. Along the line of you would look great in Victoria secrets underwear maybe we should go shopping for some together at some point

Update on Mr Big (FWB who I might be crushing on) I told him I was out of the multi dating for a while as not connecting with other irons and having to deal with some personal stuff. He asked if I was still wanting to see him and was pleased when I said yes. He then asked if he should still date others. I told him he should do what made him happy. He had a date planned but it has been cancelled. We are both not in the right stage for a relationship, live over an hour apart and our childcare clashes but we can see each other for sleepovers once every few weeks and that might be enough for me at the minute- will see.

@shitwithsugaron No, no thank you I won't cum n say hi at all until you learn to use vowels and consonants in the right way, friend. This made me laugh as I feel exactly the same - lazy and makes you sound 5 years old.

Also - I saw a post (can't remember who said it) the other day which I agreed with, which said 'if you swipe first, I'll send the message, if you swipe second you send the message' or along those lines, you get the gist. That was me saying what my guy had said on his Tinder profile and I liked the straightforward-ness of it (and messaged first).

He has asked me what I would like for breakfast on sunday so I guess I'm making use of that new tote bag and staying over

Place-marking! Nothing to report really from my reasonably boring life - chatting to a couple on Bumble who I'm going to take the initiative later and ask out (kid away with Dad a bit from Wednesday for 5 whole nights!).

Just updated a friend on last night and she has offered to look after dc tomorrow night for me.
I'm going to ask MrFox if he wants to meet.
I am so over invested but I don't care.

@30somethingandsingle I've of the opinion now (after quite a lot of soul-searching!) that just going to throw myself in to things, but on a 1 by 1 basis, I can't really over-invest because I'm so busy with work dealing with some issues with my kid I don't really have the headspace for too much angst. If that makes sense?

@midcenturylegs that does make sense.
I've not had any desire for a relationship since me exH split but now I have the urge to grasp this with both hands. I've zero interest in talking to other irons.