Handhold - Told H I want a divorce, the fallout and rise again - hopefully

[awesmum]

Part 2

Well I never thought I would have to make a follow up page.

Thank you all lovely people for the handholds, if you've read the previous thread you know what I have been through, and I can't begin to explain how wonderful I found the support on here. So Thank you ... on I go!

@awesmum thank goodness she's back! Did he drop her back to nursery again?

Your poor DD

@PrayingandHoping yes. Nursery called to tell me again. They are lovely there. I don't know what I would have done without them.

You certainly have a good one 😀

I'm so glad you have her back.

I Hope your new solicitor can get you the order to prevent him from doing this again.

So nursery are witnesses to the state that she was in too? That is good.

Thank goodness. Do you think the nursery would be willing to provide a statement?

I take it back it's not dirt in her ear - it's a burst ear drum I think ...

Poor baby. How neglectful can one father be?

Don't get it wet. Is she in pain? Good trick with young kids is to very gently blow in their ear to see if it is painful if she can't tell you herself.

Chances are if it has burst already, she probably won't be in much pain now, as it is before it bursts that is the most painful.

Poor girl. Get her to the doctor first thing.

Get her to GP. (For proof) Do not let him have contact now... (can nursery refuse he picks her up ?) court will decide from now on
This man is filth

It's burst already

Drs tomorrow.

Please don't let her be alone with him again, he is abusing her, best case scenario is neglect.

If you can, keep her off nursery for the next few days, in light of her ear injury probably a good thing anyway.

Only a few things cause a burst eardrum, infection, altitude variation, acoustic trauma (loud noise) or blunt force (hitting her head or cotton bud) trauma.

I really don't want to upset you but she will have been in considerable pain before it burst if it is an infection that caused it.

Did he get her medical treatment? Yet another reason to not let her near him.

Yes. She would have been in pain / fever/ pain.... the sirt of sickness it is impossible to ignore

It's possible for an ear infection leading to a burst drum to come on very very fast. Happened to my DD when she was 10 in the course of 24 hours. But because I am not a shit parent, I took her to the Drs when it started, got her antibiotics because the symptoms warranted it and even though it burst anyway, looked after her properly. The fact that he could let this happen without getting her any help at all speaks volumes. Get this (and the filth and eczema) documented, it's all ammunition for you.

I am speechless. Poor poor baby. And the injustice that you have to fight so fucking hard just to keep her safe. It's insane. I hope she makes a full and speedy recovery and that's the last time he ever sees her unsupervised.

Poor little thing :-(

I'm so glad she's back with you now. If there's any way you can, I really think you need to refuse contact now until the hearing. Especially now you have evidence of his neglect when he has her, as well as the horrifying way he keeps taking her unexpectedly and keeping her for longer than agreed.

Are you ok?

Oh god, he really is the gift that keeps on giving, isn't he? Your poor DD. I'd be on the phone to SS 1st thing, there has to be something that can be done. Surely that would count as neglect?

He's using a child as a weapon against you, it's not about your DD whatsoever. What a pathetic excuse for a man.

You must feel sick to your very stomach. Look after yourself too

Sending you strength op
What a nasty, neglectful bastard he is

It's horrible, but at least she is with you and is clean, fed and not shut in a room now. Besides the eczema, is she in pain at all or has she said she wasn't feeling well/fell over?

I hope your GP will also be willing to provide a statement as well as the nursery.

Oh, poor poor baby! DS1 used to get frequent ear infections and his Dr always said to get in to see him fast if he started pulling or rubbing his ear to avoid a burst ear drum. And there would have been signs, that bastard just too selfish to notice anything other than himself.

I agree about not letting him have her, BUT speak to your new solicitor asap about it first. Although I think the hearing on Wednesday is probably before his next 'scheduled' day?

I've lurked on your threads since the beginning and just have to say what an absolute piece of crap that excuse for a man is. I am so so glad your DD has you and her siblings on her side. I hope you manage to get him away from her next week, we will all be here rooting for you all.

Your conduct has been exemplary, but you must be able to find a way to stop him taking her again this week if it's affecting her health. If the courts can't see how damaging he is for her they need their heads read.

I'm so happy that you have her back.

I'm absolutely heartbroken after reading that. Your poor dd.

Please please don't let her back with him until after a court order. He is a neglectful c*nt and deserves the worst life imaginable.

I am a random person on a random website but if there's any way I can help, I seriously will.

Wow. He really is a Grade A kind of wank stain, isn't he. You're doing all the right things, OP. Crossing all my fingers and toes for Wednesday.