Starting over after 25 years - Part Trois

[Lily007]

Time to start a new thread.

I’m hoping all you ‘regulars’ will continue the journey with me 😊

My heart bleeds for KH!
Hope for your sake Lily that it goes through soon,

For you lily hope your house goes through quickly 🙂 but for KH I hope it feels like it's dragging on forever 😁

Sorry to hear it's taking so long to sell your house, it's so stressful isn't it. Hope you haven't lost the house you were hoping to buy. Sounds like you are on the home stretch now, fingers crossed. Oh, and tough shit for knobhead.

Hiya

Update and some advice please.

I’ve signed all the documents for the sale and purchase and, fingers crossed, hoping to complete 23 October.

As I’m moving from a 4 bed to a 2 bed, I’ve got quite a lot of excess furniture. I’ve got 4 sofas and only need 2, I’ve got 4 double wardrobes and 4 chests of drawers - only need 2 wardrobes and 2 chests of drawers.

My best friend has a son who’s recently bought a house following a relationship breakdown and he hasn’t got a lot so I’m giving him 2 sofas, 2 wardrobes and 2 chest of drawers. All the furniture is in really good condition but I’ve said I don’t want any money from him.

The house I’m selling has integrated appliances so I’m going to have to buy a washing machine, a hob and oven, a dishwasher and a freezer. There is a fridge which will be okay but eventually I’ll want to replace it with a fridge/freezer.

Anyway, my friend (the mum of the bloke I’m giving my furniture to) told me last week she had bought a new fridge freezer and I knew her old freezer was working okay but just wasn’t big enough so I asked her if I could have her old freezer just to tide me over until I get my kitchen done in my new house! She said “aw sorry L*(her daughter) wants it as a spare for her garage.

I’m really hurt and annoyed at this. I’m giving her son furniture that’s probably worth at least £750, for nothing and she didn’t think I deserved a bloody second hand freezer!

Oh and her son is also having the brand new carpets from the house I’m buying because I’m having wooden flooring installed.

I’ve had to buy a freezer for £150 which I’ll only likely need for 6 months max.

Do you think I’m right to be upset and should I be honest and tell her I’m upset or keep schtum?

She’s been my best friend for going on 30 years.

well it sounds as if she had already promised the freezer to her daughter but l can see why you are upset.
How good a friend is she? would she take offense and could this possibly damage your friendship going forward?
Also it is her adult son who has been given the furniture-not her.

I would just let it go. From her point of view maybe she thinks you’re ok for money and can afford a freezer as you didn’t sell all the furniture you gave her son. And maybe her daughter has a tiny freezer and was really looking forward to having a spare freezer for her garage.

@inlectorecumbit. I might not have been clear. My friend knew weeks ago I would need a freezer just to tide me over. Her daughter asked for it last weekend. The same daughter who’s just paid £22,000 for a new kitchen AND who sold her old kitchen on Ebay rather than give it to her brother!

I’m giving her son the furniture because she constantly bangs on about how hard up he is!

That said, she is a very good friend and has been really supportive since KH left but, by the same rule, over the past 2 years I’ve treated her on numerous occasions to thank her for her support.

@Frankiegoes. You might change your opinion a tad in light of my previous post.

Her daughter is definitely not in need 😂😂

Your friend / freezer aside . Can I ask - Do you really need a dishwasher as an urgent ? It's just you at home and I've never felt it a great inconvenience to wash up after a meal for just 1or two people.

I think you have a right to be annoyed Lily. I would be in your shoes.

Maybe she doesn't see her son getting your furniture as 'hers' if that makes sense.

Tbh I'd not say anything if she's been a good friend, but in future you'll know better. I also hope you're not doing any running round delivering the furniture etc.

Morning Lily! Yes I’d be annoyed, if it was my daughter I would of said no! I’ve promised it to Lily. I have a best friend of 60 years and I would of told her!! And her me! But you have enough going on, maybe get a second hand one somewhere. Must be loads around. eBay, Gumtree, I’m so glad you are hoping to complete soon. You’ll love it! Doing it up to how you want, I know I absolutely loved it. As Lilylonghohn said, don’t deliver any of it! Keep us posted. Good luck Lily 💐

I can understand you are annoyed Lily, and if it had been one of my DC's and their need wasn't that great I would have passed it on with the proviso that when you had finished with the freezer that you pass it on to my DC.
However I wouldn't say anything to my friend, some people can never say no to their DC's, however I would point out to my friend (as an aside) that many fridges and freezers die when put in a garage and you should buy one specifically designed/manufactured for keeping in a garage (I know this to my cost!)
As PP's said don't break your back enabling her son to get your furniture!

I think that was very mean of your friend. I would be inclined to tell her that you will now need to charge her son £150.00 for all the furniture and the carpet as you are having to buy a new freezer etc. See if that gets through and please don't treat her anymore, from now on she can buy her own damn coffee. BTW the son will still be getting a bargain and please bear in mind that some people's idea of "hard up" may not be the same as yours, I've been caught out in the past like this. Also it is not your job to help out her son financially, that's her job.

All the best for the move and I also wouldn't rush to buy a dishwasher, I am on my own most of the time now and I gave mine away to my niece and I really don't miss it.

@Lily007 how are you doing?
Have you moved in to the new place yet?

Hello Lily. How’s it going? 😀

You can’t charge the son now because of what the daughter got.... that’s madness

I would he miffed off, but not worth loosing a good friend over. Hope to he move goes well, on to the next phase, how exciting 😁👍

Hi Lily, how’s the move going? You should have completed by now hopefully?

Hiya

I finally moved on 23 October.

My new house has lots of issues unfortunately, had to replace the boiler and the shower as neither were working properly! The man I bought the house from had covered up numerous problems that have only been revealed after I’ve moved in.

I did know the house needed a damp course and the price was reduced to cover the cost but having to replace the boiler and shower is £3,000 I didn’t anticipate needing to spend.

He had also replaced the doors on the kitchen cabinets but left manky carcasses so I’ll need a new kitchen as well!

The damp course is being started on 30 November which I’m not looking forward to but until that’s completed I can’t do anything else.

I’m sure I’ll get there eventually but having left a pristine house I’d lived in from new, this house will take a bit of getting used to. It’s a stone terraced cottage and is 130 years old.

At least I’m not beholden to KH any longer which is a huge plus 😊

Great news about the move. The new (old) house will have character and despite the ravages of time it is all yours with no trace of KH, I am so happy for your new start

Congratulations on your move Lily. Yes, moving into an old property that needs work from a modern well maintained house is a bit of a shock isn't it? Still, it sounds as though you are already getting the important stuff done. At least your boiler and shower are now brand new and should last a good while and once the damp proofing is done it should make a huge difference.

Use the winter months (and lockdown) to plan and cost a lovely new kitchen so you will be ready to go once the warmer weather arrives.

The best bit is that this is your home and you are free from knobhead now. I hope you will be very happy (and warm) in your new home.

Just think how lovely it'll be once you have it all looking the way you want it to. It'll be all yours and have no kh stamp on it.

Congratulations on the move Lily

I'll try to be kind here, but count your blessings. You have your own house and enough furniture to give some away. I'll be renting until I die. You're getting in a strop with your friend about a fucking freezer? Hard life, ay? Like I say, count your blessings.

@PurpleTrilby ...that was a unkind comment! Lily has been through the mill if you read properly! It's not her fault (as in your own words) you will be renting until the day you die!

For you lily your new house sounds really nice and cosy.