Starting over after 25 years - Part Trois

[Lily007]

Time to start a new thread.

I’m hoping all you ‘regulars’ will continue the journey with me 😊

Thanks Lily. Honestly a 2 up 2 down is perfect. Yes, he’s been good about money and I’m enjoying not working. We split the profit on the sale of the house which I’ve been able to decorate with. Oh yes, very unhappy, sad and lonely. His words. You will get there regarding not caring, it’s hard though when you’ve been together a long time. I look at him and my heart bleeds as I remember 42 years together, then I think, look what you’ve done to me and our children and then all sympathy I had for him goes. I certainly have come out on top. Keep doing those 6 numbers Lily 😂

Good wishes to all the great women on here.

Only comment Lily is whether getting something on one level would be better for long term? Bungalow?

How's it going @lily007?

Hey Lily, you ok? 🌺

Hiya all.

@RitaHeyworthHair I won’t be able to afford a bungalow and I’m not overly fond of apartments having no outside space.

I’m doing okay thanks. House should be on the market in the next 2 to 3 weeks.

I can’t remember whether I said I’d sorted out all the photos. Anyway, I put all the photos of him, his daughters and other family in a box and because I needed them out of the house, I texted him quite late on Sunday night saying I would put them outside the front door at 5.30 pm yesterday for him to collect. He finishes work at 5.30 but works 40 minutes away. I put the box outside at 5.25 and a minute later I could see an indicator flashing on the driveway. I ran upstairs to se him pick up the box and put it into his car. About 10 minutes later he texted “thanks for the photos”.

I don’t know why, but very time I see him I start shaking and feel really down again. It’s ridiculous isn’t it? I’m absolutely fine whilst I have no contact

Ah well onward and upward. Thanks ladies for asking how I’m doing

It’s not ridiculous Lily, we can’t help our emotions, you were with him a long time it’s hard to turn off just like that. It’s a horrible feeling, I know it well. You will feel better when you have your own home it makes a difference. How is your son doing? I’m sure he’s a big help to you. Please keep us updated Lily. 🌺

@Lily007 I just spotted that it was 12 months today that you started this thread. You’ve been amazing!

Hi @Redland12. My son’s doing really well thanks. I don’t see him as often as I’d like but both him and my DIL work really hard so they don’t have a lot of free time. He rings me a couple of times a week though and if I ever need him for anything he’s always there for me.

I can’t wait to get my own house, as you say I think that’ll make me feel better.

It’s almost 2 years since he left and when I think back I don’t know how I got through the first few months.

The house should be on the market first week in March, fingers crossed it sells quickly 🤞

Thank you again for your support 😘

I've named changed but been with you since your first post. Glad your still doing well , bet your looking towards to getting the house on the market and new beginnings . Sending you good wishes.

That’s nice Lily, you know he’s always there for you. I too would like to see my 2 more but as you say they work hard and have their own lives. My son is 7 minutes from me and I’ve seen him twice since Christmas! When he finishes work he’s straight to the gym then home, but we text every day as does my daughter who is making a Sunday lunch for 8 of us tomorrow. Things will be so different when you have your own place as it’s like starting a new life, it’s weird but exciting. Isn’t it absolutely bizarre when you look back and think Christ how did I ever get through that?
But we are tough really and something kicks in and we just do it! Probably as we don’t have much choice. Keep us updated on the house please. Always here for support. 🌺

You've done so well Lily, my only piece of advice is only look forward, try not to look back.

Not long now Lily and you'll be nicely tucked up in YOUR home that kh has never had anything to do with.

Hi All

The estate agent came yesterday to photograph the house. Should be advertised early next week. I’m a little worried that because the house is still in both our names the Agent has to inform KH of any offers. This could prove problematic because whilst I need to get as much as possible he’ll just want it sold ASAP so he can stop paying the mortgage. As I’m getting all the equity there’s no incentive for him to hold out for a decent offer. I’ll just have to hope I don’t get any silly low offers.

I’ve had a really hard weekend getting the house ready for sale and I’m dreading the viewings. I hate the thought of strangers trooping through the house.

Another thing that’s really bothering me is that I know as soon as the house details are posted on Rightmove, KH will show the skank and the thought of her looking at my house makes me feel sick 🥵.

On a lighter note, a friend saw KH a couple of weeks ago at the skank’s tat stall and apparently he’s gained quite a bit of weight 😝.

I’ll keep you all posted about the house and thank you for all your encouraging posts 😘

Good luck with the sale. He may well show her, or she may look for herself but honestly let the negative thought of her potentially seeing your house go . After all she's not worth any of your emotions, is she ?

Just remember, I bet at some point she thought she'd be moving into that house, she'll be pissed he's not seeing a penny from it, and she won't be getting her lovely new home. He might be able to stretch to a caravan

Also remember you'll be sat in your new house soon, all paid for

Good luck with the sale OP and don't let KH push you into selling until you're ready.

Morning Lily. Honestly it will all work out, I never thought it would when people said it to me. Good luck with the viewings and I hope you get the price you want. It’s hard work though keeping it up together for viewings. It’s a pain but will be worth it. Cheering you on Lily 🌹🌹

HelloLily everyone likes a nosey at houses for sale. It will only show what a nice home you have made. You can replicate this anywhere.
Good luck with everything and let's welcome in the Spring.

Hello Lily, did the house go on the market? I hope you are ok. 🌹

Hi Lily how are you? I hope the viewings have gone well

👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋

Hi @Lilly007 how's it going? Hopefully lockdown isn't driving you too nutty... I can only imagine how pleasant it must be in kh and Madge's household is

I guess all house selling is out on hold for the time being, it must be frustrating as hell / worse for kh as he's still paying the mortgage - silver linings and all that

Hi everyone

The first 3 couples who viewed the house all made offers so I accepted an offer which exceeded the asking price. I found a lovely 2 bed terraced in a little village closer to my son and DIL. My buyers’ survey was meant to be done the week of lockdown so it’s all come to a standstill.

I’m really worried that my buyers will pull out which will result in me losing the house I want, but there’s nothing I can do at moment. My buyers are in rented accommodation and the house I want is vacant so I’m crossing everything that once the lockdown ends things will get moving again 🤞.

I’ve been working from home now for 3 weeks so I’m on my own 24/7 which I’m not really liking but I’m trying to make the best of it.

I don’t know whether KH is still working or not and, to be perfectly honest, I don’t care any longer. I hope him and his skank are driving each other doolally 😊.

I hope you’re all keeping safe and thanks so much for keeping in touch 😘

Lily!! I’m so glad to hear from you! I’m so pleased you have sold and you have something you want! You have exactly what I have a little 2 bed terrace, remember I said that I had bought mine and you said you would want that too! Well you have, well done. I’m sure you won’t loose it! Why would you? I’m also on my own in lockdown but it’s not too bad, you now have a great new life’s adventure to look forward to. Honestly you’ll love it. Sod him and his skank! He’s a knob. So pleased with the update, please keep us informed. 💝

Thanks @Redland12. Glad to hear you’re coping with lockdown too. It’s so surreal isn’t it? I’m awaiting delivery today of clippers so I can cut my dog’s hair, he looks like a bloody bear at the moment. Lord knows what he’ll look like after he’s been cut but his fur is getting really matted so I need to cut it.

Take care and keep safe 💝

Re the house Lily just hang on in there, nothing is moving at the moment, but I am sure you will get there eventually.
Good luck with tjhe dog clipping I am about to order hairdressing scissors so I can (try) and cut my DIL's hair and she can trim mine!
One son and DIL currently live with us and were hoping to get their own place before lockdown happened, but its all been put on hold!