Engagement ring confusion

[Blueflower22]

Hello ladies,

I am wondering what I should do as I am in a scenario where dp can't afford to get me an engagement ring that I actually like. Anything in his price range isn't that nice, I don't really want to say I don't like anything because I don't want to hurt his feelings. So I'm not sure what to do, because at the same time I don't want a ring that I'm not keen on and that I don't like at all, but I don't want to delay the wedding even more because it's already going to take him three months to save up for a ring in his price range. Any advice? Has anyone been in this situation?

Poor bloke. Hopefully you'll both find someone you're more suited to

How do you know they're not suited? Maybe he agrees entirely with her but, like her, has not said anything because he doesn't want to ruin "the romance".

If a fancy ring is your priority I'd be having a rethink if I were him. Mine was the product of emptying his milf bottlle of small change and going to a second hand shop. We're married 50 years.

I didn't have a ring. We used the money DH would have spent on a ring to put a deposit down and booked our wedding! (Made up for it with the wedding ring though...!)

Second hand would work, my ring cost £900, it’s valued at £3.5k. We have a friend who is selling a ring, bought years ago, still sold by the chain high street jellewers, now at £950, yet second hand could only get £100 for it.

You don't need an engagement ring to be engaged. Why don't you wait until he can afford something you like?

@MrsRussell I adored the Past Times jewellery, and if I recall correctly, I coveted that ring! Just gorgeous.

DH and I are very happily married. We spent A LOT more than £1k on the ring I wanted to wear every day for the rest of my life and choosing it and buying it together was a really lovely day. I would sell it in a heartbeat if we needed to. But until that day (which hopefully never comes) I love having a "fancy" ring because it's gorgeous (and no, it's not a giant solitaire diamond). Doesn't affect the happiness of the marriage either way.

that a month's salary was an acceptable figure for an engagement ring.

Wasn't that an advertising slogan? Or does it have more gravitas than that?

What is it with the ring thing on here at the moment? Eternity ring woes and now this. I really shouldn't matter that much - the person is more important than a bloody ring. Is it for bragging rights? Jut put a bloody ring on and have done with it.

I would go for vintage. A lovely Art Deco diamond solitaire.

If you want new & a bridal set
www.etsy.com/uk/c/jewelry/rings/wedding_and_engagement/bridal_sets?explicit=1&min=950&max=1000&order=price_desc

I have an antique ring. it came from Camden passage antique market and cost £60 34 years ago. The back had worn very thin so I paid £40 myself to have a new back put on at a jewellers in East Ham. It is beautiful and makes me feel happy every time I look at it. As we met on holiday and got engaged while were away we were both a bit skint at the time. The cost of the ring did not matter at all.

On the other hand my eternity ring (bought to celebrate arrival of DS1) 8 years later is very serious bling.

Sorry OP but I think you've missed the entire point of getting married.

Try the diamond store.

Rude OP.

Is this for real poor bloke, 3 months to save £1000 & you can't find a ring you like didims

May be you shouldn't get married

You cannot find anything you like for up to £1000???? Wow!
I thought you were gonna say his budget is £300, which I still think is fine.
I'm surprised you are expecting him to find more budget, when you yourself don't have anything to contribute.
My DH chose and paid for mine, as he surprised me with an engagement. He paid quite a bit more than this (I only know due to items on the home insurance!), but it was never ever what I expected.
I'd have been happy with anything, surely it's the meaning of the gift that counts?

@popcornwizard well, I have a suspicion this was 1950s-posh-boy-etiquette out of some poxy book somewhere, I doubt very much if any of the b*ggers had any real-life experience of matrimonial affairs. I remember him telling me - apologetically, as in, this thing I bought didn't cost a three-figure sum - and I think I may have laughed so hard coffee came out of my nose.

I think the 3 months salary was a De Beers marketing strategy.

It's irrelevant. The rings she likes a more expensive than what he can afford. So they need to wait until they can both afford what they want (assuming he wants you to really like the ring too) or drop the idea of diamond solitaires and get something lovely in a different style.

I was wondering if OP is really young and has absorbed a marketing message as actually being important in some way.

Don't forget that because of conflict "blood" diamonds, man made still gets you an physically excellent diamond (not a crystal) but worry-free

Congrats OP, your post has made Mumsnet Madness on twitter .

Oh wow. His budget is £1000 and you are not happy

OP are you joking? is this post a wind up?
£1000 for a ring and you cant find one you like???

Try Argos and Warren James.

My engagement ring was from Warren James and was a quarter of that budget.

i think the price of the ring matters to you more than the ring itself.

Not being funny but if your social circle know your jobs aren't that highly paid then even if your fiance saved £5k for a flashy solitaire everyone would probably assume it was CZ/fake anyway (just like I would assume that a "Rolex" was a knock off bought on holiday unless the person wearing it had the lifestyle to match the watch).

Buy an affordable ring, simple. He can always buy you a better ring in years to come - contrary to popular belief marriage isn't actually about fancy weddings or bling, it's about a legal commitment between two people in love. I bought my ring as dh's money was all spoken for paying our bills and I had a modest savings account just in my name (all our current accounts are joint but this was from an inheritance), 20 years on dh has promised me a new one for our anniversary.

Winterhatsandgloves

Please could you send me details of that jeweller- I m very interested!