Engagement ring confusion

[Blueflower22]

Hello ladies,

I am wondering what I should do as I am in a scenario where dp can't afford to get me an engagement ring that I actually like. Anything in his price range isn't that nice, I don't really want to say I don't like anything because I don't want to hurt his feelings. So I'm not sure what to do, because at the same time I don't want a ring that I'm not keen on and that I don't like at all, but I don't want to delay the wedding even more because it's already going to take him three months to save up for a ring in his price range. Any advice? Has anyone been in this situation?

Mine is my great grandmothers. Much better than it sitting in a drawer.

Don’t have an engagement ring? I didn’t (because I didn’t want one) and had a diamond wedding ring instead of a plain band.

I had my engagement and wedding ring made personally for me by a local jeweller. It's exactly what I wanted and I love it. It's an emerald rather than a diamond, which cost less, and the jeweller looked at my design, clarified the size/quality of the stone I wanted (I actually ended up with a slightly bigger stone than I'd anticipated), and made it up within 2 weeks. It cost about £500 in total for 2 rings.

So personally I'd recommend getting a jeweller to make what you want. And compromise on the stone you get, either going for man made diamond or a cheaper type of stone (I love my emerald, but could quite happily have chosen a ruby or a sapphire, I like more colourful stones)

Go vintage and oh yeah... don't be a brat

Not sure if I've read this wrong or not fully understanding...

You may hold off the wedding because you can't find a ring you like for his budget which is £1000 but the wedding is only going to cost you £200 all in?

If I'm understanding right, why bother with an engagement ring?? I'd get married asap in that situation but part of me thinks you're more arsed about having a huge diamond in your finger.

My engagement ring and wedding band came to a grand total of £110. The meaning on them outweighs the money value.

www.bluenile.com/uk/engagement-rings/styles/round-cut?track=NavEngShapeRd

You're not coming across well OP.

Is it being married to your partner you're excited about or showing of your bling? I feel sorry for the poor guy - what's the saying - wanting a champagne lifestyle on a lemonade budget? Why not just tell him outright he's not good enough

Presumably you both earn modest wages, I'm wondering where you get your expensive aspirations from. I just hope my sons don't end up with somebody so materialistic because I think we would fall out pretty quickly.

OP I work with antique and modern jewellery and could get you a 1ct solitaire for less than the £1k

Bargains can be had at a local
Auction. Diamonds are millions of years old, having one that's been worn before is just recycling!

www.thefinejewellerycompany.com/18ct-white-gold-certified-051ct-diamond-solitaire - under £600

We didn't get engaged but we bought a ring 10 years later (and it is stunning and not under £1k)

I got an engagement/wedding band in one. We both paid for it.

I think the 3 months salary was a De Beers marketing strategy.

It was indeed.

It would be fine to suggest adding to his budget to get a ring that you love, if you could afford to. It is not fine to say his (large) budget is not enough but you have no money to add to it.

If you really can't find a ring that you want under a grand, perhaps subconsciously you are trying to slow down the wedding.

What a weird post. Having an engagement ring isn't a legal requirement to get married so is no issue in delaying the wedding. Do you want to marry the person you love or do you want a fancy ring to show off.

Buy your own or contribute towards one you do like. That's what I did.

If you would like a solitaire with a largish stone why not go for a fake one, it will still be beautiful and perhaps in the future you might be able to afford a real one.

Some of the rings posted on here are beautiful, I love a nice solitaire. Claracluck 1 CT for under a grand sounds like amazing value.

I strongly endorse the recommendation upthread that you look at Moissanite! Are you anywhere near Birmingham? Charles & Colvard are in the Jewellery Quarter.

I have this, it's absolutely gorgeous and looks exactly like a diamond except that it has a higher refractive index (the sparkle). My ex stole my actual 2ct diamond solitaire when he left. No-one will be able to tell the difference, and you don't have to tell them. Just smile sweetly. You'll love it. :-). I know it's shallow, but it did banish the pain of the theft still hurting 13 years after it happened.

The price hasn't gone up since I bought mine four years ago.

Moissanite is silicon carbide, the same mineral as sapphires and rubies. It keeps its clarity and sparkle just like real diamond. If I was getting engaged now I'd have this in preference to a real diamond; De Beers keep diamond prices artificially high by having a monopoly and only releasing very limited quantities of diamonds at long intervals; they aren't actually that rare. And there's no risk of getting a blood diamond.

Yeah I guess you guys are right. We have decided to delay the wedding until next February and then we will get married as we have both decided we want to get married abroad in the end

Oh my god. So much judgement on here. All the patronising "you're missing the point of marriage" blah blah blah comments. It is possible to understand the meaning of marriage as well as wanting a beautiful ring in a style you love. She's asked for advice about finding a ring she likes, not how to fleece her future dh for everything he's worth.

£1000 for a ring and you're only planning on spending £250 on the wedding. You're actually having a laugh...

Also, there's no way you'll only be spending £250 on the wedding. It's £70 alone to go and see the registrar to put up a notice of wedding. Then you have to pay for the registry office, and the price of that is dependent on where you are getting married. Where we are getting married, our registry office is £250 for a Monday... The budget just makes fuck all sense.

Anyway, your original question. There are loads of beautiful rings for £1000. Plain solitaire is a common enough design and plenty of jewellers stock lovely ones.

Perhaps you just need to reassess your priorities...

Also endorsing Moissanite! My engagement ring is Moissanite from the above linked website in 18ct White Gold and the quality is brilliant unlike my wedding ring from Samuels that has had to be replated almost annually since it went on my finger (lesson learnt there).

I feel wholly uneasy about cheap conflict diamonds, and the price for a conflict free diamond in the style I wanted was frankly astronomical and simply not worth it to me. Moissanite is beautiful, inclusion free and simply stunning. I’ve added a gorgeous pendant to my collection, and earrings are next. As silly as it sounds, I don’t worry about wearing them abroad (we like to travel to some dicey parts of the world), and I don’t have to pay anything extra on my home insurance because they’re under the single item value limit. So many pluses for us.

We used the money we saved on not buying a ridiculously priced engagement ring, and having a small wedding to go on a series of luxury cruises

As if .

What a joke.

Get the wedding ring first and then save up for the engagement ring it if is that important long term.

I wouldn’t wear a ring I didn’t like!
If I were in your shoes I would use the full budget to buy a nice wedding ring.