Engagement ring confusion

[Blueflower22]

Hello ladies,

I am wondering what I should do as I am in a scenario where dp can't afford to get me an engagement ring that I actually like. Anything in his price range isn't that nice, I don't really want to say I don't like anything because I don't want to hurt his feelings. So I'm not sure what to do, because at the same time I don't want a ring that I'm not keen on and that I don't like at all, but I don't want to delay the wedding even more because it's already going to take him three months to save up for a ring in his price range. Any advice? Has anyone been in this situation?

There is no 'confusion' here, you are being a spoilt brat.

I think you should be honest and let him know what you think.

Er, don't have an engagement ring, they are not a requirement!

Get what you’re given, or contribute.
Rings are a luxury not a necessity.

I received an engagement ring on our first wedding anniversary - and I chose it myself and paid the bulk of it - we were students. No problem.

Do you really need a ring? There might be more important things to consider here.

Also agree with ravenmum - you have to be able to broach difficult subjects with this man without it causing a big problem... it's key to a happy marriage. Be honest. You know 1k is A LOT of money but you really can't see a ring you like in the style you want for 1k. So you'd like to both save up a bit until you do see something you like - in the meantime, you'd like to go full steam ahead with the wedding (assuming you do want to go ahead with the wedding) because being married to him is the most important thing.

Christ. I'm more than happy with my £120 ring that I helped pay for, I'm shocked that there is nothing in that price range that you like.

You would be better off having a £100 ring rather than wasting £1k on one you don't really like.

OP I think yo need to psot some pictures of the rings you like. You're saying a simple solataire but refusing anything under 1K. I think you're fussier than you admit

My engagement ring was around 1.5k but if he had given me one worth 50 quid I wouldn't have been bothered

It's the sentiment that is most important

You could have one made for £1K. Get it made with a fake stone you can replace later if you want it to look like you have a bigger solitaire than you can afford. Nobody would notice there are really good fakes about.

Also your £200 wedding budget - does thst include wedding bands? You split the cost of a cheap wedding and two cheap bands but HE has to save to buy you a princess ring??

Two options. You can choose one in his budget and then replace it when you have the cash ( my mil had at least 3 engagement rings over the years upgrading each time!) Or don't have one, just put the money towards a nice wedding ring. My mum never had an engagement ring. It hasn't impacted the marriage which is the important bit.

£1k will buy a lot of ring for your money. Mine was £1k down from £2k in the sale at Ernest Jones. Just be canny about buying it, and choose it together.

Look at eBay. FH paid £1,600 for mine and took it to a shop for valuation. It was valued at £6,200!

Go to an auction. I got a vintage 0.5ct solitaire for £127

You can get beautiful unique rings on etsy that don't cost high street prices?

My (late) fiancé was advised by well-meaning friends - NB he was working in the City at this point so not mixing with ppl for whom disposable cash was an issue* - that a month's salary was an acceptable figure for an engagement ring.
I think in the end it was about £20 from Past Times, it was a silver replica of one of Anne Boleyn's rings with garnets and amethysts and I loved it.

DH (who is very much alive and a different one, in case anyone is confused) bought me something similar price, green amber set in silver. from a lovely shop in Whitby on holiday.
I'd be terrified of having an expensive engagement ring in case I lost it. I have dreadful form for losing jewellery, I take it off when I'm baking or gardening and ... yeah.
*this is not a nasty generalisation, his mates where he worked at the time were all single and minted.

Ha! I thought that you were going to say that his budget was £50.

A piece of advice for you op - please don't marry someone that will always fall short of your expectations. For his sake as much as your own.

Poor bloke. Hopefully you'll both find someone you're more suited to. Someone rich for you, and someone who loves him for who he is not what he can spend on an engagement ring for him.
Here have a while you ponder your prima Donna tendencies.

Chuckling at the advert for rings at the bottom of the page - its almost like you can find rings anywhere

Agree with PPs is there something more to this?

I would certainly not put off a wedding to the man I loved because of a bit of jewellery, but if you really do want a ring, there are plenty of good quality and 'noticeable' second-hand ones well within the £1K budget mentioned upthread, for example these:

carolefranks.com/view.php?prod_id=4218
carolefranks.com/view.php?prod_id=4476

They are just from one website, for speed. Plenty of other good second-hand jewellers available.

I had a really pretty second hand ring for £160. Some bastard burgled us and stole it so I got a new one on the insurance for about £580 which is very nice but the original was much prettier. I doubt I would ever get £160 for it.

I really cannot see the point of impoverishing yourselves for something that is so easy to lose. If you like rings you can collect a few eternity rings etc at a time in your life when you have less important stuff to pay out on.