I think my husband has hacked my phone

[recall]

I think that my husband has hacked my phone. We are talking about getting divorced and I went to see my solicitor on Friday and he knew, plus one or two other things.

He said that someone had told him this information about me via text messages. However, once I'd given it some thought, I could reference this precise information from two recent chats in Messenger.

Also, on recently my phone has started playing up ...going blank ...and having trouble charging it. I can charge it and it suddenly runs out of power and goes off. I believe this can be a symptom of having spy software running in the background.

Anyone had experience with this or have any advice ?

Buy a cheap phone and put your sim in it.

Reset to factory settings, reset all passwords

Oh horrible. Yes get cheap phone.

Pls don't tell me you've written this post on the mobile app??

I would conveniently "lose" that phone and buy a cheap no thrills

Does he know (or could he guess) your passwords for FB/Messenger, and could just log in via his own device? If so, change all your passwords.

How old is the phone? My phone kept suddenly dying, it had a fault somewhere internally, and needed a new battery, nothing to do with anyone having put spyware on it.

Oh you could have such fun with this. Start making up some interesting shit for him to find out!!

Yes have bought a cheap phone. I'm not at all tech unfortunately...will it not come across on my SIM card ? ( I know I know ...I'm clueless )

Get a new phone, a new SIM card a new number, change your email address, your mobile provider will be able to help you, block him on everything.

I'm going into Apple tomorrow to get help. Unfortunately my number is a very old established number that I use for my work ..I may need to keep it as a work phone but get a new phone for me .

SIMs basically store numbers etc. Not apps or anything malicious.

He’s probably set up find friends on your phone and is tracking you

He has downloaded something onto your phone hence it draining so quickly. Very easy to do apparently!

Look up spyera.com will give you an idea of what technology is out there, grim reading unfortunately

Change even for work - it sounds like it has a tracking app too so if its on he knows where you are - its also illegal and considered abusive by the Police - if you feel so inclined you can take the phone into the police. But before going that far get everything out of the house that you want or is of value or pertains to shared finances

Make sure that he is not recording your conversations at home. Voice recording devices are cheap and small, inconspicuous.

Buy new phone
Take old one into Apple and ask them to check
If there is something, use old phone to send him on a wild goose chase

Right ok ..thank you
Will go to police, there has been some domestic violence also.

Nice chap

Or your phone might just be buggered.

possibly but there are too many coincidences...it happens to become extremely buggered on the same day I have private meeting with my solicitor regarding divorce.

I have just tried to make an appointment with Apple to get some support and a message flagged up saying someone was using my Apple ID on a device in London ...we live in Devon

My husband frequently lies to me and is extremely manipulative

You need to cancel everything. Deactivate it all. Buy a new phone, get a new number, set up new secure passwords that he can’t guess. Don’t use birthdates etc, set up new email account - all of it. I’d also recommend getting new bank cards and changing all online passcodes for banking stuff. Go into an Apple store with your phone (just walk in and wait) explain what’s happened and tell them you want a new phone with everything different. Then contact your work with your new number. Before you go to the store write down all of your important contact numbers. It’s worth starting from scratch because it sounds like he has hacked you.

Get rid of the phone and get a cheap android. For this new phone make a new email address etc. Even your Mumsnet account. He probably has access to your email, Facebook accounts etc so you need to reinvent yourself basically.

Has he had physical access to your phone? Text messages can usually be accessed remotely, but spyware needs to be installed; is your iPhone jailbroken? In your logs is there any unexplained use of data (spyware uses huge amounts as it is constantly sending logs).

There is an app that can check btw, but with the Apple ID log in it might be that your iCloud is being targeted as this is harder to detect (if you use it).

You need your email to change most passwords so your first job is to change your email password, preferably using a work or friends computer in case your own has a key logger on it.. Use your now secure email to change all your other passwords and remove second numbers for security. Your DH could have used his own number to be the security checker so any changes are sent to or authorised by him too.

For now, go into settings then battery. Here you will see a list of apps installed on your phone that are using your battery. The spyware if there's any, will be on there. It could be called anything though so delete anything suspicious.

Lots of good advice above.

You do NOT need to change your SIM, phone number or email address.

DO: first check that there is no spyware installed. Wait until you know there is nothing installed to change all your passwords.
DO change passwords for email, bank accounts, facebook, icloud, voicemail and any online account you can think of.

Make sure that your phone can only be unlocked with your retina or fingerprint (no pin or pattern).

Deactive findmyphone/findmyfriends, and other remotely linked accounts (for instance web whatsapp?).

Also, take your c9nversations outside of the house, it is very easy to hide little microphones around. Lastly, if you want to keep your privacy, pass your phone bill/bank statements to paperless if not already done.