My husband has left me out the blue

[Nikjayne]

Hi, I’ve only been married for 2 years and my husband worshipped the ground I walked on, all my family and friends could not believe how lucky I was that he doted on me, he was constantly telling me I was his best friend and soulmate, 4 weeks ago he said he had fallen out of love with me and he was leaving, that 10 min conversation was how he chose to end our marriage, he has completely cut me out his life, he works in London Monday to Friday and he said he could not get the home/work balance right anymore, I’m distraught

Hi all this is my first post so here goes! I feel your pain, my husband of 5 years (together for 8) told me 2 days before Xmas he was leaving. I naturally am devastated! He is blaming it on my 14 year old son (his step son) they have always struggled to bond but my husband has still always treated him like his own! Only the last few months my son has been very difficult and things got quite bad between them! and it's been hard to keep everyone happy we also have a 6 year old together! The thing is I am convinced he has someone else and it's tearing me apart! He absolutely denies it but I just have this nagging gut feeling. He has moved in with his nan and is being so nice it's annoying because I just want to scream and shout at him. Has anyone else experienced anything like this? And should I trust my gut instinct?

You should start your own thread, @Tommy2012, rather than hijack someone else's.

Tommy welcome to mumsnet. It would be good for you to start your own post as you've posted into someone else's post. The relationships topic is a great place to get advice on the type of thing......

Oh OP

Reading this was like a mirror of my ex fiancé (although no previous children)

He’d had a string of long term relationships but no one was ‘marriage material’ until he met me! Immediately shoved me up onto such a high pedestal he could barely cope with his feelings and proposed after 4 months!

He was charismatic and intelligent with an international job and he was 5 years older than me! I thought 🤔 he’s obviously very reliable and put together!

Almost two years in, and a few months before our wedding, he just decided I wasn’t the girl he’d thought I was. Out of nowhere!
I told him he was crazy - you don’t ‘know’ someone a few weeks into a relationship so what he saw now was me- not the fabricated perfection he’d seen right at the start!

On reflection he was very controlling and very good at picking at me whilst making it sound like a compliment.

Him- (eying my 10st 5’9 super lean 23 year old body) Did you lose more weight? Well done 😁 - just need to work on toning the backs of those legs now- no body likes a bride with cellulite!

Lucky escape!

So I’m still struggling with how he has treated me, I messaged him a few days ago about starting divorce proceedings and he still did not reply, I thought he would be happy aboutva divorce, it’s slowly destroying me that he is not giving me a second thought and I can’t bear the fact that I will never see him again, it’s just too painful, I never questioned his love for me but now I’m not sure it could have been real for him to move on so quickly

This is awful but does remind me of my end of marriage - exh met someone else and dropped me like a hot potato didnt communicate , cared nothing for me. It was hard to take after 14 yrs of marriage. Its going to be hard just take each day as it comes and be good to yourself. Do things that make you feel good facials nails etc. Exercise helped me it made me feel good physically and mentally racing out your nervous energy on exercise bike is great! Its a grief you are going through but it will pass. Counselling might help it did for me helped me think about what i wanted from life. Wishing you well. PS Exh OW was a right bunny boiler - he lives alone whilst i now have a new partner and a DS!

@lozzerbmc, we were only married for 2 years and up until the weekend that he left he was constantly contacting me during the week (he worked in London mon-fri), was always telling me I was his best friend and soul mate, I think he grew close to a woman he worked with and always hated cheating, it’s possibly been a drunken mistake then thought he might aswell carry it on, I think about him constantly and don’t know how he can hate me so much