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Original poster

3 years and not met his kids or mum and dad

104 replies

chloeblower · 03/12/2018 16:26

met my partner after a messy divorce of 20 years ,

he has 3 boys and i have one girl, he stays with us when he hasnt got his kids but when he has them we dont see him at all.

at first it wasnt an issue as i thought that would his time with his kids he had been broken from. the first xmas we were together he had dinner at his mum and dads with his kids and was his mums birthday on boxing day he went round there to with is kids . wasnt that long in the relationship so didnt really make anything of it.

then last xmas he had them xmas eve so we booked xmas day out the 3 of us, stll going to his mums boxing day with his kids and us not getting a invite. ( felt hurt ) as it wasnt a normal day .

through this year we have fell out on and of about meeting the kids and his mum and dad but it never has happened. said we would go for something to eat with his parents and its never happened.

we had booked a nice restaurant this year for all of us but he decided i would be too expensive for all of us so that got cancelled and he was going to do something at home, nothing set on stone and still hadn't met the kids yet so that would be awkward. so in the end ive invited myself to a family member me and my daughter.

i have mentioned to him if hes going to his mums again but i dont thinks he being honest with me, just doesnt like taking about it.
his older son goes when the other two do and his girfriend goes who i also have never met

when i tell my friends they say it isnt right? im starting to feel not good about the situation

the kids arent babies neither 18, 16.14

OP posts:
PotteringAlong · 03/12/2018 16:27

It’s weird, and a massive massive red flag.

Thankyounext · 03/12/2018 16:29

Do you think they know about you?

UnicornSlaughters · 03/12/2018 16:31

I'm very sorry but I don't think they know you exist. He's wasting your time.

Loopytiles · 03/12/2018 16:32

Not that into you?

Why have you continued to let him spend time with your DC when this isn’t reciprocated?

Original poster
chloeblower · 03/12/2018 16:33

they do know about me

OP posts:
Original poster
chloeblower · 03/12/2018 16:34

we do things as a family the 3 of us, holidays etc been way 3 times this year

OP posts:
Original poster
chloeblower · 03/12/2018 16:35

something a miss for sure

OP posts:
desperatesux · 03/12/2018 16:35

How do you know if you haven't met them ?

desperatesux · 03/12/2018 16:36

So he can afford 3 holidays but not a meal out ? V v fishy

userxx · 03/12/2018 16:38

Hmmmmm something isn't quite right here. 3 years is a really long time not to have met his family. I have met my boyfriends after 3 months.

PotteringAlong · 03/12/2018 16:39

How do you know they know about you?

kayakingmum · 03/12/2018 16:42

Maybe they don't want to spend time with you/don't like the idea of Dad being with another woman. If that is the case, why does it matter?
In my opinion the main thing is the three of you are happy together.

ThunderInMyHeart · 03/12/2018 16:45

Huuuuuuuge red flag. This is beyond weird.

Original poster
chloeblower · 03/12/2018 16:50

i paid for my holidays he didnt

OP posts:
desperatesux · 03/12/2018 16:51

Did you pay for him for the holidays too ?

Original poster
chloeblower · 03/12/2018 16:51

because we speak a number of times on the phone and they seen a facebook pic of 3 of us on holiday and one of them showed it him

OP posts:
Whyislarryhappy · 03/12/2018 16:52

Bit strange indeed. Maybe try get his parents number and give a call, say you'd like to meet ect. We what happens. 3 Years is a long time to be with someone and not meet their family

Original poster
chloeblower · 03/12/2018 16:52

no i dont pay we went halfs so included my daughter to

OP posts:
CanSurvive · 03/12/2018 16:55

Unless you were there, he can say “DC showed me a pic on Facebook of us on holiday”. And it’s all bollocks. Sorry his kids and family really don’t know you exist. He either has a complete other family or he has no intention of ever being a family with you.

Readingonthetrain · 03/12/2018 16:56

Sounds like he’s leading a double life. Are you sure he isn’t married? What about his birthday- who does he spend it with? I can understand his kids might not want to meet you, but I would have thought his parents would have been at least curious. If you dig I suspect you’ll find you are the OW. Sorry.

Readingonthetrain · 03/12/2018 16:58

There was a thread the other about an OW and you can apparently select who sees what on your fb thread. So he could make sure that his wife (and I’m going to assume he has one)/parents/kids couldn’t see anything about you on fb and vice versa.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 03/12/2018 17:00

Well dodgy

Rayn · 03/12/2018 17:04

I agree. Think he is still married. What does his social media pages show. Does he put pics of you on there together x

Trinity66 · 03/12/2018 17:05

That sounds really odd. My first thought was he must still be married but if you're 100% his son saw your FB picture then i don't know

AgentJohnson · 03/12/2018 17:05

The question isn’t ‘why has he not done x,y or z?’ but ‘why the hell you’ve continued to swallow his lame arse excuses’?

There is a reason he hasn’t introduced you to his family and if you continue to accept his excuses, you will continue to be, none the wiser.