Looking for some perspective from you nice people. This is likely to be long. Sorry.
I've been seeing somebody for 5 short weeks, we met on OLD.
We messaged for a couple of days, spoke on the phone and decided to meet up 3 days later. It was Instant chemistry when we met.
For context on OLD over the last couple of years I've been catfished 3 times, stood up numerous times and had guys turn up to dates who looked nothing like their photos. So It's fair to say I'm wary. He also knew about all of this.
After we met up I looked up his FB profile ( he'd mentioned his surname ) which was completely locked down with only a profile photo visible.
So I also googled him. I found a press release with a quote in it from him, this confirmed he worked where he said he did.
I also found an entry on Companies House, this gave an address and a date of birth. I was able to deduce that it was likely to be him, which confirmed he lived in the area he said he did and also confirmed the age thé dating site said he was.
Given my past OLD issues I found this information hugely reassuring as I liked him and it meant I could relax a bit and start to get to know him.
Cut to Sunday night just gone, he phoned me, we were having a laugh and a chat and the subject of birthdays came up as it was mine in the next couple of days. I don't know why I did it but I dropped into the conversation that I knew his date of birth and it all ended up with me confessing that I'd googled him after out first date. He seemed fine with it during our conversation and we went on to arrange a 5th date for this Saturday coming.
I went to bed and sent a short goodnight text on WhatsApp( we've got into the habit of goodnight and good morning messages )
Next morning I saw the message hadn't been delivered to his phone or read and just knew it was because of my googling admission.
He sent me a message yesterday morning saying I'd fucked everything up by googling him and he'd only ever been honest with me.
I was really surprised at his reaction given he was fine during our conversation the night before.
I fully expect to be googled by anyone I go on a date with and have no problem with it.
I google lots of people, my new landlord most recently ( given that I'm handing over a large sum of money to him every month ) that kind of thing. Never for nefarious purposes.
Obviously I've apologised for doing this and explained my reasons behind it but he won't talk to me now. I know I can't make him but feel its an over reaction on his part. Doesn't everyone do this? These are information records on the internet that are public, anyone can access them.
Plus I'm gutted I've seemingly ruined a possible relationship with the first man I've liked in quite a while.