Namechanged for obvious reasons so I could give full honest account
Yes I was married when I met my now husband.
I had been married for 2.5 years but had been together for 14 in total.
My now husband wasn’t married but had been with his partner for 10 years.
For both of us these were our jest relationships from school and both had turned out bad and we had seemingly accepted the way it was not knowing any better.
I won’t comment on my partners ex as I didn’t know her well enough so all I’ve got to go on is what he told me about her an that’s just one sided.
My ex was abusive, financially and emotionally and the week I finally left him he raped me too.
He was a bully to our dog and I desperately wanted children but knew I couldn’t with him as he was so nasty.
I don’t regret it at all and have learnt since how a loving and respectful relationship can be and we have a wonderful baby.
I am more sad for the hurt our affair caused on my husbands ex as to me she was innocent (despite DH telling me otherwise).
Our affair lasted 5 months.
We broke up from our exes on the same day.
We hadn’t planned it that way and there was no discussion that we would be together but the day he called me to tell me that he had left her, I realised I could be strong too and to stop living a lie.
I went home and told him the same day.
I then locked myself in he spare room all night as he got violent and angry and I was scared.
The next morning I packed anything of mine that I could fit in my car and drive to my mums with my dog and asked if I could live with her again.
She had no idea how bad things had got.
The months following were hard as my ex was constantly turning up at my mums house.
He refused to sell the house and delayed the divorce and then I found out he had been stealing money from me for years and had secret loans that were in my name, so I didn’t come out with much.
The only thing I’m really sad about is that I left a few sentimental things in the loft which i will never get back and have probably been chucked long ago.