Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My Date Last Night. Help me make sense of it.

228 replies

Conway007 · 25/10/2018 15:18

I recently met a guy on OLD. After a few messages, we exchange numbers and spoke on the phone. He then texted to ask if he could take me out on a date. I agreed, he booked a table at a very posh restaurant (his choice) and the date was last night. I arrived before he did and was taken to our table. When I asked where he was, he told me that he was stuck in the traffic but on his way. He was one hour late!

I was expecting an athletic, tall and good-looking man as described in his profile and the pictures that he sent before we met. Instead, a fat, short bald man walked towards me - I tried my best to keep my disappointment to myself. He was scruffy and before sitting down said he was going to the toilet (nothing wrong with that). I could not understand why he would conceal his disability before we met, not that it would have mattered.

As soon as he came back, he started eating the bread which was on the table - he was eating so quickly. When our main course came (went straight for main as I wanted to get out), he ate using his hands and sometimes cutlery, he was dipping bread into all sorts of things. After he had completed his own food, he asked if I had finished, I told him that I had had enough. He asked if he could taste. In the end, he took my plate and polished everything. When the waiters took the bread away he demanded that they bring the bread back.

If that was not embarrassing enough, I returned from the toilet to see him counting carefully folded notes all over the table. The money was folded up in a little plastic bag. I suggested him that we should share the bill. He agreed and asked him to stop counting the money as I would pay the balance on my card.

We paid and I couldn't wait to get out the place quickly. I think he asked if I wanted to go to the cinema.

Why would a person conceal their disabilities? Why would a person lied about what they look like if they actually wanted to meet?

OP posts:
Sinalley1 · 25/10/2018 16:24

Def not a meal first time, only a quick coffee...because i think you know in the first 10 secs whether or not if you will never sleep with them (not necessarily, if you ever will). So, what's the point of a dinner if that's out of the window?

You need to be incredibly efficient with internet dating. it's a numbers game.

PasswordRejection · 25/10/2018 16:24

A friend of mine is 5'11". She once arranged a date with someone on a dating site who claimed to be 6'2". On the way to the date he called her and asked if she was really 5'11". When she said yes he asked if she was wearing heals. She turned up and he was about 5'8" Confused. He then told her that he doesn't date woman taller than him Confused

People are strange.

LemonBreeland · 25/10/2018 16:27

I wouldn't have waited an hour for someone. Traffic is often bad, and should be planned for when leaving.

universe00 · 25/10/2018 16:29

Sounds like an absolute nightmare !
What a idiot block him and never speak to him again

Trinity66 · 25/10/2018 16:29

FaceTime next time before meeting.

Legtime him more like

AdaColeman · 25/10/2018 16:32

When he said that he was athletic, perhaps he plays tiddely-winks professionally? Did you not ask him what sports he played?

Always arrange to meet for coffee on the first date, and never wait more than ten minutes.

I can understand him eating the bread though.

Sallygoroundthemoon · 25/10/2018 16:33

A surprise Douglas Bader...
Brilliant Grin.
Am laughing out loud on the train and being looked at.

Lweji · 25/10/2018 16:35

Maybe he was late 1 hour because he parked in Mayfair? It's possible, but not easy.

Money in a plastic bag...
Drug dealer, you think? Or builder? (not bodybuilder, clearly)

Also, you don't know he's younger than you. Have you asked him for proof of ID?

thenightsky · 25/10/2018 16:37

Is everyone else drooling over the menus at Scotts of Mayfair?

Justmuddlingalong · 25/10/2018 16:37

Maybe she chopped his leg in half and counted the rings?

user1467718508 · 25/10/2018 16:38

Was his conversation good?

Belina · 25/10/2018 16:38

i would of never paid half for this date

HollowTalk · 25/10/2018 16:39

I wouldn't have paid, either!

Conway007 · 25/10/2018 16:40

@Lweji, he said he is a professional guy, without going into details, he works with children since uni.

The whole time I was waiting he kept in touch by telephone. I was about to walk out when he walked in.

According to his profile, he is one year younger than me. I have no proof

OP posts:
ThunderInMyHeart · 25/10/2018 16:43

When I asked where he was...

That would have been enough for me. Not to even give someone a heads up when you're going to be late doesn't really scream 'keeper'.

I've been there though, OP. OLD is a bugger. Add it to the 'hilarious anecdotes' section of your brain.

BlancheM · 25/10/2018 16:43

You just made me laugh like I'm Jimmy Carr, can you not? I'm in public!

Lionsandtiger · 25/10/2018 16:47

Sounds like a crap date OP. I would be really pissed off that he was rude and wasted your evening and money on a date with him when he lied so much on his profile. Definitely do short coffee or one drink dates for a first meeting.

Hubblebubbletripletrouble · 25/10/2018 16:50

I’m still confused about how you know he has no legs?!

QuimReaper · 25/10/2018 16:51

Maybe he was taller when he still had legs

Grin Grin

SummerGems · 25/10/2018 16:51

The fake photo would be an instant deal breaker, surely?

I think that jumping to the conclusion that someone has false legs on account of the fact he parked in Mayfair (do you actually know that’s where he parked or did he just say that?) is a bit of an odd conclusion to jump to.

Having said that, I do think that it’s pertinent to mention a disability before you meet up if that disability is very life-changing, and I speak as someone who has a disability which couldn’t be hidden.

I certainly understand that people wouldn’t want to mention it on a dating profile, but once you’ve got to the point of talking to someone and arranging to meet up I think that you need to be somewhat honest about yourself. Some disabilities do have an impact on the kind of life you can live or the kind of needs you might have, which could potentially impact on a long-term relationship. If you don’t already know the person then you might not want to consider that as a factor you take into account when purely dating.

TBH though reading so many stories on MN about online dating I do wonder how anyone manages to do it or why they’d even try. Grin

ThunderInMyHeart · 25/10/2018 16:57

Counting money out of a plastic bag,..Mike Ashley?!

JeSuisPrest · 25/10/2018 16:59

I'm crying at some of these replies.Grin

AnyFucker · 25/10/2018 17:02

How much was the bill ?

JeSuisPrest · 25/10/2018 17:03

@ThunderInMyHeart

Counting money out of a plastic bag,..Mike Ashley?!

Did he have his coffee served in a massive cup?

Conway007 · 25/10/2018 17:03

@ThunderIn, I was flabbergasted when I returned from the toilet - money was spread all over the table, £20, £10, £5... I thought I was dreaming. The restaurant was packed as well...

It was like a scene from a horror film that was playing before my eyes.

OP posts: