Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My Date Last Night. Help me make sense of it.

228 replies

Conway007 · 25/10/2018 15:18

I recently met a guy on OLD. After a few messages, we exchange numbers and spoke on the phone. He then texted to ask if he could take me out on a date. I agreed, he booked a table at a very posh restaurant (his choice) and the date was last night. I arrived before he did and was taken to our table. When I asked where he was, he told me that he was stuck in the traffic but on his way. He was one hour late!

I was expecting an athletic, tall and good-looking man as described in his profile and the pictures that he sent before we met. Instead, a fat, short bald man walked towards me - I tried my best to keep my disappointment to myself. He was scruffy and before sitting down said he was going to the toilet (nothing wrong with that). I could not understand why he would conceal his disability before we met, not that it would have mattered.

As soon as he came back, he started eating the bread which was on the table - he was eating so quickly. When our main course came (went straight for main as I wanted to get out), he ate using his hands and sometimes cutlery, he was dipping bread into all sorts of things. After he had completed his own food, he asked if I had finished, I told him that I had had enough. He asked if he could taste. In the end, he took my plate and polished everything. When the waiters took the bread away he demanded that they bring the bread back.

If that was not embarrassing enough, I returned from the toilet to see him counting carefully folded notes all over the table. The money was folded up in a little plastic bag. I suggested him that we should share the bill. He agreed and asked him to stop counting the money as I would pay the balance on my card.

We paid and I couldn't wait to get out the place quickly. I think he asked if I wanted to go to the cinema.

Why would a person conceal their disabilities? Why would a person lied about what they look like if they actually wanted to meet?

OP posts:
shouldidoitspoilt · 25/10/2018 15:43

Was it nigella lawson ex husband? He's small and old 😂😂

SendintheArdwolves · 25/10/2018 15:43

What's to make sense of? You had a bad date with a guy who lied on his profile.

Sorry you had a shit night. Next time, agree to a coffee, and leave if he's more than 20 minute late.

shockthemonkey · 25/10/2018 15:45

You've been watching too many TV detective dramas

ilovepixie · 25/10/2018 15:46

I went on a date with a man off a dating site and during dinner he told me he wanted to shit on my chest! And another who wanted to take me dogging! Yours sounds quite normal lol.

shockthemonkey · 25/10/2018 15:46

Cormoran Strike???

catsmother · 25/10/2018 15:47

Loads of people on OLD aren't who they say they are and false descriptions/'borrowed' photos are rife as a means of getting their feet in the door ... working on the risky assumption they'll be less likely to be rejected in person as many people - like you OP!! - are too polite to tell them to get to fuck for treating you like an idiot.
It doesn't make much sense to me either ... when you've been deceived, anything serious is very unlikely to develop as a result. Surely an awkward hour of someone else's company when you know that you've tricked them into joining you can't be at all fulfilling?!? It must have been excruciating.
In future, ask for a photo with them doing something ... like standing in front of today's schedule on the TV ... so you know it's genuine.

UtterlyDesperate · 25/10/2018 15:47

ilovepixie I think we met the same man. Or there's more than one of them that thinks this makes good first date conversation... Grin

GlasgowWorrier · 25/10/2018 15:48

He can afford to park in Mayfair. I think he was just trying to stealth boast there.

I'm struggling to see how you jumped to the conclusion that he had no legs because he walked 'with difficulty'. Did he clink like the Tin Man when he came in or something?

RatUnholyRolyPoly · 25/10/2018 15:48

Surely an awkward hour of someone else's company when you know that you've tricked them into joining you can't be at all fulfilling?!?

The cynic in me thinks that sometimes they're hoping you're stupid enough that you might get drunk in that hour. VERY drunk.

Nonotmenori · 25/10/2018 15:50

I park in Mayfair all the time... completely misses point..

I'd block and move on. If he wasn't honest and upfront then it'll never work.

Fairenuff · 25/10/2018 15:52

I would have gone to the toilet and left. If he can leave you waiting for an hour, you can skip off home early.

FilledSoda · 25/10/2018 15:53

How was the food ?

MrsBrownsGirlies · 25/10/2018 15:54

Anyone can park in Mayfair if you either feed the meter or it's out of hours and free Hmm

Justmuddlingalong · 25/10/2018 15:54

Why would you wait an hour? 60 minutes is a looong time to hang around for someone you're meeting for the 1st time. 10 minutes, 15 max in future, no matter how athletic, tall and good looking a profile is, or how posh the restaurant.

Womanlikeme · 25/10/2018 15:55

Never go out for a meal on a first date! I have disliked some dates on sight with a heart sinking feeling but only had to stay for a quick coffee before I could get away. Would have been easier in your situation.

Conway007 · 25/10/2018 15:55

@RatUnholy, no alcohol was involved as he was driving and he did not wanted to get wine for me anyway... I hated myself for waiting for an hour.

OP posts:
Coconutspongexo · 25/10/2018 15:55

Lots of people conceal their disabilities mostly due to arseholes making comments on them...

SheCameFromGreeceSheHadaThirst · 25/10/2018 15:55

Ah, the OP has joined MN specifically to share this excellent tale of presumed false-leg syndrome with us. We are truly blessed Smile

TatianaLarina · 25/10/2018 15:56

It’s incredibly British to have a whole meal with someone who has posted a fake profile.

On eBay he’d be items not as described.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes · 25/10/2018 15:56

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SadVillageGirl · 25/10/2018 15:56

Have you heard from him since last night?

dontalltalkatonce · 25/10/2018 15:58

A) Don't go to an expensive restaurant for dinner on a first date. B) Leave if they are more than 15 minutes late.

Tighnabruaich · 25/10/2018 15:58

Did he apologise for being so late?

Itsnotabingthingisit · 25/10/2018 15:58

I kind of think anyone who waits an hour for a date, then doesn't walk out immediately when it's apparent the date has lied on their profile , deserves everything shitty that comes after that.

Sorry.

Bluntness100 · 25/10/2018 16:00

What do you mean he didn't want to get wine for uou? Why can't you get your own wine?