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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Would you believe this woman who's claiming my partner cheated on me?

104 replies

Fran6581 · 23/09/2018 17:25

She contacted me via FB telling me she'd been seeing my partner until she found out about me, she humiliated me by copying my friends & family in the message. He denied the affair but 3 weeks on, he's talking to her again & he claims they're just friends.

OP posts:
HollowTalk · 23/09/2018 17:27

Did you post about this recently?

To be honest, I would believe someone - I don't believe the world is full of women who'd say that when it wasn't true.

WineGummyBear · 23/09/2018 17:27

There's not enough information to say. How do they know one another? How has your partner reacted? How does he account for her message if they are not having an affair?

Sorry OP, it all sounds rubbish

Notamorningperson84 · 23/09/2018 17:29

I can't see why he'd stay friends with someone who lied about that. So yeah, I think she was telling the truth. Also also think they're still more than just friends.

Sorry OP Flowers

whiskeysourpuss · 23/09/2018 17:30

You need to give this up - this is at least the 4th post about this I've seen recently!

He's a douchebag! You'd be better off without him - no one is going to tell you otherwise.

Haireverywhere · 23/09/2018 17:33

Obviously could be wrong but yes I would believe her. Why would he stay friends with her if she's lying and trying to humiliate you and him and destroy your marriage? It's more likely to me she's telling the truth and they had what she thought was a break up and she outed him, but ultimately has feelings for him and he's working his way back in. She was hurt and angry and lashed out to humiliate him, not you I think.

Artofpretending · 23/09/2018 17:34

You posted about this before and everyone said the same sorry. Yes he is cheating plus he sounds horrible anyway.

StrippedOfDeposit · 23/09/2018 17:34

How many more times does this have to happen before you realise he’s guilty as sin and he’s not going to stop cheating on you?! I wish you the strength to leave him.

mooncuplanding · 23/09/2018 17:36

Why won't you leave him?

WellThisIsShit · 23/09/2018 17:39

She is irrelevant.

Look at his behaviour. Tells you all you need to know. Honest, loving partners who aren’t cheating do not behave like that.

Why do you want to be with someone who is causing you pain?

gylly · 23/09/2018 17:40

Even if he is telling the truth he clearly doesn't love you. If a male friend of mine lied and told dh that we were having an affair I would realise that the "friend" is an enemy of my marriage and would not have anything to do with him.

Thingsdogetbetter · 23/09/2018 17:40

Again? It's not going to change reality no matter how much you post about it.

Either he cheated and doesn't give a fuck about you by remaining friends with the ow. OR he didn't cheat and doesn't give a fuck about you by staying friends with a woman who lied about sleeping with him to hurt you.

All possibilities in this end with him not giving a fuck about you. I'd be very surprised if they were just friends now.

Getting concerned about your mh OP. You don't like the advice given on any of previous threads, but keep posting in the vain hope that someone will say what you want to hear: that he loves you and only you. They won't because it's obvious to everyone but you that he is taking you for a mug and you are more than enabling him.

You know he's a cheat, he cheated on your friend with you in the first place. Your obsessive love for him is not going to change reality. He cheats.

foodiefil · 23/09/2018 17:41

He's talking to her again even though she told you and your friends/family they were having an affair?

Wow he has no respect for you at all.

HE is your problem not HER

Alfiemoon1 · 23/09/2018 17:43

Have you posted this before? I can’t see why someone would claim to be having an affair with your dh if it wasn’t true. Why would he want to be friends with someone who has falsely accused him of having an affair ???

Artofpretending · 23/09/2018 17:43

I think you do believe her but for some reason you are choosing to stay with him and going through agonies over it because you know he is a scumbag.

RatRolyPoly · 23/09/2018 17:46

Again? Why??

Bottom line is who cares if it's the truth?Your "boyfriend" isn't all that into you, which might be sad if he wasn't such a total waste of space.

Ophelialovescats · 23/09/2018 17:47

Who is she?
A work colleague?
Why would he talk to someone who does that ?

Gemini69 · 23/09/2018 17:55

She humiliates you and embarrasses you by sending a message telling everyone he was having a relationship with her....

and he is STILL in contact with HER...

he cares not one iota for you or your family or friends... he wants HER

SparklyMagpie · 23/09/2018 18:08

Oh ffs!

Did you have trouble acknowledging the same replies from the million other threads you have started about this?

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 23/09/2018 18:10

It's deja vu, all over again :)

ArtemisWeatherwax · 23/09/2018 18:13

Perhaps one day he'll drive off in his bus and leave you to it.

SandyY2K · 23/09/2018 18:24

This sounds very familiar. Is your partner a bus driver and lives opposite you?

HereIgoagainxx · 23/09/2018 18:28

Why do you want to hold on to a cheater? Do you think because another woman wants him that he is some big prize? You need to pick your self esteem off the floor and get rid of his cheating arse for good .

You will never trust him. Find a man you can trust.

AnyFucker · 23/09/2018 18:34

Wake up, ffs

PrincessWire · 23/09/2018 18:37

Is this the bus driver again?

If this is for real then yes, he cheated. He posted about it on MN.

hammeringinmyhead · 23/09/2018 18:39

Come on. You know what's going on.

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