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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Is sending a naked picture cheating?

106 replies

Tilly30 · 04/09/2018 23:24

My boyfriend of 4 years sent a picture of his d*ck to another women along with sex talk etc. He denies that it’s cheating and I should be lucky as it could of been worse. Do you think it’s a form of cheating? Or am I going crazy?! Ever since then the trust has completely gone and I can’t seem to trust him. HELP!

OP posts:
MeMyselfand · 04/09/2018 23:26

Yeah it's cheating. Ask him if he is alright with you sexting and sending naked pictures to other guys

Kleptronic · 04/09/2018 23:28

Look at it this way, if he'd posted a picture of his dick in her letterbox, what would you think?

spottybetty · 04/09/2018 23:29

Ha ha. Of course it’s cheating!

Original poster
Tilly30 · 04/09/2018 23:30

At least I’m not going crazy! Just so hard to get the trust back x

OP posts:
Singlenotsingle · 04/09/2018 23:30

Well my dp would be horrified if I did it! (No dick, obvs!)

Booop · 04/09/2018 23:31

Oh tell him to do one. who cares if it's cheating. What sort of a nob (sorry about the pun) sends dick pictures. For that he would be out the door.

DC06 · 04/09/2018 23:31

It's definitely cheating. Sorry but you don't deserve that. I've had an ex who cheated on me and the once the trust has gone it's almost impossible to get back x

Booop · 04/09/2018 23:32

and as you do care if course it's cheating.

bluemoonchances · 04/09/2018 23:33

He sends dick pics and sex chat to someone else, and then rather than grovel with apologies because of his behaviour he instead tells you that's it's not cheating and tries to make you feel like your over reacting ??!!
You deserve better OP. Move on and find someone who deserves you.

Doingreat · 04/09/2018 23:35

Oh god. Sending the dick pic is bad enough. But that comment he made that you're lucky it wasn't worse... that's vile. You're so so lucky he didn't get the opportunity to cheat on you. And if he did it would be your fault for not being lucky enough. He sounds so ENTITLED.

Why the hell are you with this loser? He's minimising his disgusting behaviour. He doesn't sound remotely sorry.

There's a reason the trust has gone. Your instinct is telling you he's not to be trusted.

LARLARLAND · 04/09/2018 23:36

It is cheating and you are in no way lucky that he is your boyfriend.

BinkyandBunty · 04/09/2018 23:36

I agree with bluemoon, the gaslighting is even worse than the cheating.

Telling you you're lucky? What a giant fuckwit he is.

NothingOnTellyAgain · 04/09/2018 23:38

Yes of course it's cheating.

Sorry.

Dimael · 04/09/2018 23:38

Ok so he hasn’t physically touched anyone that we know of but it’s not acceptable really. How would he like you sending photos to other men? I don’t think so. His comments are what get me the most about this. He is a manipulator. He is trying to make you think you are overreacting and this is what worries me. Get him dumped!

Original poster
Tilly30 · 04/09/2018 23:38

Thank you everyone. Really appreciate the honest advice. Has anyone forgiven an ex for cheating and how is your relationship now?

OP posts:
Scabetty · 04/09/2018 23:40

How disrespectful. You deserve better than this arrogant shite. He has broken your trust and your feelings are normal.

NonaGrey · 04/09/2018 23:41

He denies that it’s cheating and I should be lucky as it could of been worse.

Not exactly overcome with remorse is he?

I’d have thrown him out for that comment alone.

NeepNeepNeep · 04/09/2018 23:41

Why bother getting the trust back? What a knob. Pun intended. Ditch him.

stevesmithsmum · 04/09/2018 23:43

I should be lucky as it could of been worse

Wow! You’re sooooo lucky! Your bf is a disrespectful dickhead.

AtrociousCircumstance · 04/09/2018 23:48

You’re scraping the bottom of the barrel if you stay with this betraying scumbag.

Lucked · 04/09/2018 23:49

I don’t think I could trust someone doing this sort of behaviour anyway BUT even worse your partner doesn’t even think it’s a big deal so no you can’t trust him ever.

PolkaDoting · 04/09/2018 23:49

So you’re thinking of forgiving him?

Mrskeats · 04/09/2018 23:51

Come on op. You know the answer.

shuthefrontdoor · 04/09/2018 23:52

I'd tell him it is going to be worse and pack his bags for him! Disrespectful shit x

wheresthehope · 04/09/2018 23:56

Don't forgive him for this or he will do it again!
What do they call it? gaslighting!
You can do better!