Dating Thread 135 - Will Harry Ever Meet Sally?

[Kinunir]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

lolol at sticky outy tummy. I think it's a sign they just don't look after themselves well (is normally alcohol).

my honest opinion, if you don't feel it now, it won't come. Whole of online dating is built on shallow principles tbh

What’s MB?

What’s MB? confused

Slip and slide
Hiding the sausage
A bit of how's your father
2 minutes of squelching noises

AKA doing the deed

MB = MooseBurgers - see Kin's description above!

DaffoDeffo - I never feel it! I always have to keep my eyes shut when I have sex with blokes my own age these days - and the last one was 5 years younger than me!!!!!!! I'm wondering if there will ever be anyone I fancy of a similar age. There isn't anyone in real life either. Sigh.

how old are you margo?

I do know what you mean! Who do you fancy in real life (like off the telly or anything)

I find most men over 40 unattractive and I'm nearly 40 myself ffs!

Margo I’m laughing at ‘big sticky out tummy’, I know what you mean though, we at find different things atractive and unattractive, I’m not a fan of sticky out tummies either.

Kin great moose burgers definition Hiding the sausage

I think my head has recovered from last night. Mr Campervan has messaged me this morning which is a good sign, I always worry after MB as I read so often about men just vanishing.

user your right, I think one men reach 40 they start to change quite a bit (not all of them), usually I date older men but I think this is where I have gone wrong. This is my first iron in a while that’s under 40, his belly is starting to stick out

Late 40s. Off the TV, I fancy Jon Hamm, Chris Noth and Pierce Brosnan.

I go to the gym, get my hair done, paint my toenails and generally look presentable. I'm not an athlete or a super-model and I'm realistic about my chances about finding anyone who looks like any of the people I fancy. Which then makes me think I will never find anyone I fancy, so maybe I should just settle for someone who is a good person and who I can manage to have sex with, if I close my eyes!

Yay, Love - glad you got MB and a next day message too.

There has to be a bit of physical attraction for me but I find that grows as you get to know one another, have things in common and laugh together. Laughter is definitely my aphrodisiac!

Can you have good sex with someone you don't fancy on some level Margo?

Yes, I can Kin but I've never been able to do the whole mind & body connection thing, so I think I come at it from a slightly different perspective to a lot of people.

I'm wondering if I should be jealous of you in that case. I can turn the emotion on and off but intellectual stimulation is my aphrodisiac.

I can't, Kin, I've been there and the difference is maybe not so much in the moment as you're able to go more with the sensations, but it's afterwards when you feel a bit icky. That said, I find people attractive for very different reasons that just classic good looks. And over 40 is fine by me. I dated someone twice my age once who had the body of a 40 year old and he was terribly sexy!
I'm currently mantra-ing rules 3 and 4 of this thread, because Mr. Mafia is so bloody amazing. We've spent 18 hours together and that's only 2 dates! 6 hours talking on the first and then the second date went from 5pm to 5am! The last three hours of that, after the bars had closed were just a good old fashioned make out session in a car followed by a trip to McD for a gross breakfast! Felt like an American teen!
I'm not into sleeping with anyone for quite a long time, as I know it doesn't have a great effect on my emotions! Get too attached etc. So I'm wondering what the hell we're going to do on the next date as there's so much passion already from both sides. Can't believe it actually. He ticks all the boxes! How long is unreasonably long to hold off on, um... MB?

Margo - I'm intrigued by this. I'm late 40s too and I've found that when looking at profiles online there are men around my age that I find attractive - unfortunately, so far there's either something that puts me off them, or they just aren't interested in me.

I wouldn't date someone who I found unattractive, but I think attraction can develop if you click with someone (or at least that's what I hope). I'd not be interested in a big belly either.

I don't think it is a good thing at all. You end up just with the mechanics, rather than anything truly meaningful.

Glad to hear that dogzdinner - gives me hope!

We've all got to keep hoping Margo

Carousel - what are you looking for with Mr Mafia? Are you looking for a relationship? Is he looking for a relationship? Have you had that conversation? What do you know about him? I think the decision to have sex depends a bit on what expectations are. It will be different for a FWB type relationship to that where you are looking to go long-term.

yes I find it interesting too as I'm also in that age range

last bloke I had something with was lovely but I just couldn't get on with him physically. I think I really do not like beards, there is something about them that puts me off (despite that, I do quite like hairy men).

bloke before that (last year) was incredibly hot - looked after himself and took pride in his body but we didn't click at all relationship wise. I would still fancy him though but he's one of the few people I've fancied in a very long time.

I tend not to find men traditionally attractive any more. I'd struggle to think of someone off the telly I fancy. I think men change late 40s/50 tbh - it's almost like a man menopause where things start getting droopy, saggy, bellies really come out. Given we potentially go through the same thing, our skin gets less elastic, little bellies harder to lose - I do think you have to see past it to a certain extent and hope that the attraction develops but it's definitely not as easy as it was when we were 21!

Hi all again. Loving the: DTD = Mooseburger = hide the sausage chat!

Regarding fancying people margo, maybe you've just got fancy fatigue? lol

I'm new to dating, and I've found myself looking at everyone and thinking a) do I fancy them? and b) do I recognise them from OLD?

It's like when you are newly pregnant (or trying to be) and all you see are babies and prams everywhere.

I think it probably varies regionally too. My local area has a high proportion of men who don't really take very good care of themselves - so by late 40s/50s they're looking a lot older and really not attractive.

I find when I go to London there are attractive, healthy-looking older men everywhere!

I find when I go to London there are attractive, healthy-looking older men everywhere!

I thought that was you eyeing me up dogz!