He's gone back to her again!!

[youloveitorhateit]

A month ago I found out my boyfriend of 3 years had been sleeping with someone else, she had no idea about me (apparently) had heard from a friend he had a girlfriend and then messaged me on Facebook, she said he texts and calls her all the time and sent me screen shots of messages of him even saying he was in love with her, how he misses her so much and wants to be with her. He’s been seeing her at least once a week for a few months.

I forgave him because I’m an idiot. Yesterday I found out he has been seeing her again, and even after all the trouble of her finding out about me even delivered flowers at her front door. I know I probably shouldn’t of but this afternoon I’ve text her a load of abuse but I can’t help feeling like such a mug, we spoke on the phone weeks back and she promised never to speak to him again. He’s coming home from work and refusing to talk about it because he’s “tired” he just doesn’t give a shit does he? I’ve asked him over and over if he loves her and he smiles and says “not really”. It hurts more the fact it’s the same girl he’s going back to!

I’m going to have to leave him now aren’t I someone give me a kick up the ass before I end up making myself look even more stupid!

“I feel like he must give a shit about me else he would be with her?”

He is with her

Every chance he gets

He’s like a pig in shit, come on op, don’t you have any sensible rl friends who can take your phone off you and delete him from everything and block him?

They are both playing you. You are allowing them to do this.

You, young woman, deserve to have kind, honest, loving relationships.

Get a fucking grip and block the pair of them.

You deserve better.

Problem is, you clearly don't believe it. Otherwise you'd already have been long gone.

Wake the hell up. He is treating you like shit now because you're letting him. Block him, block him, block him. Refuse to engage. Find someone worth your time and effort.

I forgave him because I’m an idiot
Yet you are still wanting to be with him? Someone who'll screw around.
Why are you posting OP, when people are advising you what to do, you want to stay a loser.
You'll have an unhappy life and be looking over your shoulder all the time, and asking so many women to leave your fella alone.
Are you not worth more than this?

You want her to block him and have no contact because that will make it easier for you if you stick with him??

So you want him to stay with you because he can’t have her, not because he actually loves and respects you??

C’mon kid! Please do not give this guy another second of your time. You’ve wasted years already. If you stay, I guarantee he will eventually drop you like a hot shit, for her, or someone else. And you will feel even worse than you do now.

Take the little bit of power you have left and cut him dead as of right now.

Why would you want his manky double-dipping penis anywhere near you after this?! If she is also shagging her ex (lovely) god knows what's going around this triangle. Of course he won't say he wants to be with her. He'd get bored with just one woman fawning over him and he stays with you every night for free. Bin him off!

If I were you, I’d message her saying you’ve thought about it, and he’s actually not worth shit, he’s not even fit or good in bed, and he’s a serial cheater so she can have him. Tell her no hard feelings, and wish her good luck.

Then block him, never speak to him again, and tell your parents.
It’ll make her doubt whether he’s anything worth fighting over, and you get to keep your self respect. You’re also sticking two fingers up at him.

You will be happy again, and meet someone else. There’s no future with this guy, it’s going one way, sooner or later

Oh god don’t say the line about him not being fit or good in bed

Please please do not take him back.

It will feel horrible for a few days, weeks maybe but you will come out of this stronger

If you stay with him he'll continue to treat you like dirt, he won't respect you and you'll drive yourself insane with insecurity and the inability to trust him.

Don't play his game. Don't try and read between the lines. Don't keep feeding his pathetic little ego by even giving him a second more of your time.

Walk away.

Even if he does love you and not her...it doesn’t matter. He’s treating you horribly. He’s still messaging her and seeing her. He knows how upset you are and is still going on like this.

Even if he stopped seeing her tomorrow and pledged undying love for you, you should still ditch him. He’s showing you he is a liar and a cheat and someone who puts himself first. That won’t change just because he ditches his other girlfriend. He’s a scumbag and not trustworthy.

I dare say we will hear from you down the line, talking about your baby’s father cheating on you AGAIN. Pull yourself together and get some self respect. He DOES NOT LOVE YOU. He is treating you as a thing to have sex with until the real thing comes along. Though he’ll no doubt cheat on her too. By any chance does he benefit financially from the, so called, relationship with you? Are you spending more on him than he does you?

I feel like he must give a shit about me else he would be with her

No, he knows that he can fuck who he likes and as long as he spins you a load of bollocks you’ll still drop your knickers for him. That really is the long and short of it. He’s with you because you’ll put up with anything.

No, he knows that he can fuck who he likes and as long as he spins you a load of bollocks you’ll still drop your knickers for him. That really is the long and short of it. He’s with you because you’ll put up with anything

this ....

Right then, this is gonna be long and wanky but here goes

You are in love with a dream of a life and a future with someone who loves you passionately and you desperately desperately want this man to be the person to give you it. You want him to say ‘i am so sorry, i will never let you feel hurt like this again, because you’re amazing and i love and respect you so much and from now on i will cherish you’. You want him to rescue you from how hurt and reeling you are.

He won’t. He is not a hero. He is not marriage or father material. Off shagging someone else because “attention”? How much “attention” do you think you’ll be able to give him when you are heavily pregnant/post partum/worn out from the daily grind? He will do it again and again and again. When someone tells you who they are, do them and yourself a massive favour and believe them.

Now here comes the mariah carey bit. He is not a hero who can say this stuff to you and promise you this amazing future and mean it, but there is a hero in your life who can. And that person is you. You can promise yourself the future you want with someone who respects and deserves you. You can vow to be kind to and cherish yourself and never let yourself feel hurt like this again. Those things can and will happen for you, BUT they won’t, not the way you want them to, with this man. So the first step towards that feeling of relief, that ‘thank god everything’s gonna be ok, i’m getting my happy ever after’ is to tell him, in no uncertain terms, that your relationship is over, he is never to contact you or your friends or your family ever again, and you have to mean it.

You are the person who is going to give you the happy secure loving future you want. And it starts with binning this absolute howling bellend right off.

@MissVanjie
🙌🏼
PREACH!
Read and re read OP

@MissVanjie 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

OP PLEASE read and re read and read again what @MissVanjie Just said

It will all be ok, but not with him

@MissVanije

Wish I had this with my ex from someone.
OP - you’ve gambled and lost so you think that if you just keep playing you will get your losses back (and maybe some).

You won’t. You will lose more of your previous time, energy and emotion.

Relationships are hard but they should also be enjoyable and loving. Affairs do happen to couples. If you want a grown up relationship -move on, because they sound like a pair of school kids a d you are getting to the same level

“Affairs happen . .”

Sorry - ignore that bit. I was writing something else and decided to delete it, but missed a bit!

Block him on everything and tell your parents, so he cannot try and weasel his way back in. It hurts but do try and have some dignity. That OW really owes you nothing and your real issue is with that shitgibbon, not her!

Sorry he is such a knob.

Do not make this about her.
Sadly this isn't about you either.

He is just an unfaithful, unloyal, egotistical wankers who frankly doesn't seem to care about either of you much at all.

He's only worried about your parents knowing because he knows how badly he treats you and how badly they will think of him
He doesn't seem to give a shit about what you think you.

Oh, and sorry but pls get checked for sti's

Oh my god. Why would you want to be with someone who treats you like shit and has been having sex with another woman?

You are better than this OP. Everyone is!

There will always be another way for them to contact, She promised once and went back on her word. And if it's not her it could be anyone else that gives him any attention.

You will only ever second guess your entire relationship if you try to continue.

Tell your parents, YOU block him, not her. You are worth so much more.

For heaven's sake, is this what you wanted from your life?

Thank you all. I’ve just been sat here drinking tea and refreshing this thread in bits I don’t even feel like eating, the past couple of weeks all I’ve felt is that horrible sick feeling every time I wake up. I’ve text and told him to pick up his stuff from my house tomorrow, my mum will be home from work soon and I’m just going to tell her everything. I hadn’t told her already because I wasn’t sure if I was going to stay with him, he will never be allowed in my parents house again now.

I seen a comment about if I spend money on him more than he does me, I do spend a lot of money on him and he pretty much lives at my mums house with me, he’s still living at his mums but they don’t get on so every night he is at mine. He turns up at all sorts of hours and ignores me a lot so chances are OW isn’t the only girl.

OW says she isn’t interested in him either (apparently wants her ex back) I know they have spoke on the phone tonight and she’s told him if he texts or rings her again she will be forwarding it all to me because she isn’t interested, he’s sent her texts begging her and all sorts so he obviously doesn’t give a shit if I see them.

Just re read what I’ve just wrote

He doesn’t get on with his family so he’s at my house every single night, he doesn’t want me to tell my parents not because of what they think, but because he knows he will no longer have a place to stay. That’s what he’s gaining out of our relationship. Can’t believe this