Brave Babes Battle Bus: Sunshine, Roses and Mocktails All Round

[SweetLathyrus]

Hi, I'm SweetLathyrus, Sweet for short, and I've been on and off Gerald the Brave Babes Battle Bus since 2014. Over the years, lots of us have maintained the thread, most of all the lovely Mouse, who has been here since the early days, and still scurries onboard when she can.

The bus is a place of support, safety and occasional silliness for those of us struggling with our relationship with alcohol. Some of us are sober, some are trying to be, some are moderating and aren't ready to give up alcohol just yet.

So whatever your reason for questioning the whys and WTFs of your drinking, hop on board, make yourselves comfortable and join in. Driers and Triers, all welcome.

Summer offers all kinds of challenges for those of us trying to change our relationship to alcohol, pub gardens, summer holidays, school holidays, and apparently there's a big football tournament too. If you want to read where the bus has been so far this year here's the link to the
last thread

And in case you want to know how it all started, here is the link to JWN's original, inspiring thread

The Bus is a bit of a Mumsnet institution, but it has an open door policy, no cliques, no judgement, and the welcome is always warm. So hop on and join us.

If we could limit ourselves none of us would be here on this thread.
It will pass it promise. Now go drink some water. Go on...☺

Coconut I find things like appletise help I got some nice non alcoholic drinks from m & s the other day as well

How did you do coconut? Maybe you white knuckled it through (and are glad you did); maybe you found that actually the craving subsided (for that is what was going on when you thought that 'moderating' was a good idea); maybe you had 'just one'; maybe you had a few (but less than mirmal, natch); maybe you just thought fuck it and reverted to normal.

It doesn't matter. You're welcome here. The main thing is - what did you learn? And how will that help you tomorrow?

Hi Coconut and Devon. Welcome :)

Extremely very bad night last night. Went to pub with g/f and could quite easily have sunk a pint. Lots has happened which has stressed me out and I'm finding quite a few things testing. Anyway I got through it. But I feel like I'm close to falling off the bus The euphoria of quitting to the testing has run out and my memory function is appalling. Worse than when hungover which I'm having difficulty understanding? I thought I would be super-quick and fresh but I'm exhausted and head is muddled? Can anyone explain that?
Anyway - 13 days sober and 2 weeks this morning since my blip

I failed. I told myself if I was still craving it at 9pm I'd have a few, I was clock watching from 8.15 and the moment the clock hit 9 I pretty much ran to the kitchen and finished a double within 10 mins. I had 3 doubles and went to bed at 11 as I'd finished the bottle I had left and knew if I stayed up I would have walked to the local asda to get some more. I also added two litre bottles to my online shop due tomorrow. Woke up this morning feeling very annoyed at myself. I have removed the bottles from the online shop because if it's not in the house I have a better chance of succeeding. I managed 2 days so least I can be pleased with myself about that. Day 1 again today...

@iron, the thing to focus on is despite how bad you wanted to drink you didn't. That's amazing.

Just checking in. Hi to newbies. Feel shit when I drink, feel shit when I don't at the moment so lurking rather than posting as have nothing remotely helpful to offer.
Off to London today for work

Dh being really unhelpful, he's not a drinker at all but seems to prefer me when I drink and when I told him I want to quit basically his face fell and he seemed disappointed. He was the one last night when I told him I really wanted a drink saying we'll you've done 2 nights so reward yourself, and saying that because I managed to go to bed last night I've proved I don't have a problem, but he doesn't seem to get that if there had been more alcohol in the house I would have kept going....

Coconut - if you're ready then I can't recommend Jason Vale's book 'Kick the drink... easily!' more. Download it..

Coconutcreampie my dh has found me stopping alcohol challenging tbh he never minded me drinking too much. He is supportive but it's a lot for people to get used to around you. No one likes change...

Coconutcreampie and devon welcome and keep trying day one. It doesn't matter how many day 1s you have just keep trying. I am so pleased to not drink - feel very grateful to not have the daliy wine conversation. The shame. The worry about the consequences of all of this.

Podcasts (bubble hour and mother recovering) and sober blogs mummys a secret drinker helped me hugly. My mindset around alcohol was completely off and needed a huge 're think.

Every time you have time time off. A day off whatever it is you are banking up sober experiences.

I honestly didn't feel great for a while after stopping drinking. No bounce. But little by little.... I was depressed I am not now.

Keep trying xx

Iron sorry that last bit was for you. I started to take a good multi vitamin and vitamin c as honestly the first 4 weeks I felt Ill with various colds etc.

Thanks Saywhen I'll look into all of that :) I'm putting lots of weight on which I don't want to do...

Iron i gained initially (the sugar which is the lessor evil!) But that calmed down after a while. I am now 8lb less that when I stopped drinking.

You are doing brilliantly. I remember being disappointed I didn't feel amazing in that first month. But gradually for me things got better and better. Xx

Evening all. 3rd time attempting to ride the bus or rather stay on. Serious this time.

Day 3 and actually not feeling too bad. Day 1 & 2 were awful but both myself and DH doing it so supporting each other. I drink far more than he does but he will easily drink every night if I do so both in the habit.

I had an awful pain in my stomach last night - read it could be alcohol affected my stomach lining so drank green tea with Manuka Honey. Seemed to do the trick and doesnt hurt so much today.

I do feel really bloated though . I didn’t expect to lose weight straight away but my stomach is so bloated I look pregnant. Could this be my body adjusting to no alcohol? I havent eaten any more food to compensate the non drinking - in fact just drinking the same amount of water as I always have done.

Anyway planning on staying on the bus now I’ve bought a long haul ticket.

And yet another fail. All my usual triggers and I can't stop succumbing. I'll be back if I manage another day 1. Thank you.

Hi babes - and welcome to all newbies. Old timer here but a bit like Ma am not feeling much of an inspiration at the moment so not posting much. Wanted to welcome you all though.

Devon - come back whether you make another day 1 soon or not. Plenty of us in the sidecar. Just being here will make more day 1's, day 2's and then weeks and months possible - but until then nobody will judge you.

Coconut well done for taking the bottles out of your online shop! `i would definitely chalk that up as a win. How are you tonight?

Timetochange - is time of the month re: bloating? Or could just be your digestion adjusting to lack of sugar in booze? I have no idea but I also have random periods of bloating and I'm of an HRT age so no clue. Peppermint tea helps me

Venus - you were lovely to me when I set up my own business, a real support, so sorry you are having a bit of a struggle on the work front. That's why I rejoined an agency in the end I think. I don't cope well with uncertainty, but I know you are well-established and respected. I honestly think summer (especially a hot one like this) makes a difference. Are there any groups you can join for freelancers in your industry? I am in a couple on LinkedIn and Facebook and they do quite often generate leads. Am often surprised at how generous people can be in passing on contacts for things that are not quite right for them but that may suit other contractors. OR maybe it is time for your big new idea... would love to hear more!

Have been reading back but lack the memory to NC you all but wanted to offer a big hug to MsHoolies especially - I remember you so well and often thought of you so great to have you back. Your key worker sounds fab - has she sorted that bitch social worker out yet? I can't get over how you always manage to offer support and encouragement to others no matter what you are going through. You WILL get through this and you are an inspiration

Iron - I am also separated after a long marriage (5 months tomorrow since the bastard left) and although life is better without him in the main, my drinking is haywire at the moment as are my moods. I do not miss HIM at all but coming to terms with being single at 50 (51 tomorrow, fucking hell) is an emotional rollercoaster, being a single mum to moody teens is a challenge, coping with a demanding job with no home back up is exhausting - and the uncertainty about which way WB will jump from one week to the next (nice/nasty/involved with kids/absent) is also a headfuck. Sorry about the language. But anyway, drinking a lot. Which is hardly enhancing my ability to cope.

The oddest thing is that some of my oldest friends have been absolutely shit and massively unsupportive despite badgering me to leave him for years (whereas some brand new ones have been lovely over and above the call of duty). I know there are a few of us on here who have split up from long-term partners - it would be interesting to compare notes.

Ironically probably won't drink tomorrow on my birthday as have to drive - am going to cinema with kids in the evening. To see Incredibles 2. So hopefully can channel my inner superhero. If she's still in there. No capes though.

Lots of love to all of you and sorry to those I haven't namechecked but I do read all your posts and cheer you on inside...

Hi @time, there's none in my house and I feel relatively calm, not even really craving any right now, I know in the coming days it will get harder as I've coped for a few nights off before, it's normally around day 3 I start to struggle most so I guess we will find out Friday night.

Happy birthday for 4 minutes time. Sounds like you have a lovely one planned.

Happy birthday looking xx

Happy Birthday hope. Your first birthday in a long time as a free woman. That's some present you have given yourself babe!
Have a great day

Hi all ... having a shit day so far. At doctors and the automatic booking system fucked up my appointment so been here an hour and have a meeti g with my boss which I am now late for. Want to cry.

Happy birthday hope your day improves x

I'm so cross. Just written a long post and lost it.

Iron It was ages until I felt a real improvement from stopping. I sleep and eat much better now.

Coconut There's certain drinks I can't have in the house now and I'm 6 months in. It's much easier without temptation in the next room.

Devon You can post whether you make day 1 or not. We'll support you whatever.

Time Well done getting to day 3. It's good you and DH are supporting each other. I don't know about the bloating. It's not something I had when I stopped but everyone's different.

Happy birthday Looking! All the best people are born around now. It's my birthday tomorrow! I want to see the Incredibles 2. I'm going to wait until it comes on mini mornings and take DS. I hope your days getting better.

Venus I hope work picks up for you soon. It's stressful when it's not going right. It'd be great if you could get a new project going though.

Twattage How are you getting on? Not seen you post for a bit.

Hello to Ma, Alfie, everyone else.

I'm not up to much. I've bought some AF kopparberg for Friday. Not got anything planned as it's the last day of term for DS and he's had a busy week and it's meant to rain all day. We'll do something on the weekend instead.

I have not been on the thread for a while- too ashamed. Situation has got worse. A bottle of wine a night during the week and find it hard not to start drinking at about midday at the weekend. Worried that I am killing myself slowly.... Marriage is in tatters- drinking a consequence of this, not a cause.

Reading this thread gives me hope

Hi all. No time to read posts - will tom 🤗.
Just wanted to check in to say it's my 2 week abstainaverssary. I'm well chuffed