Am I a “slut”?

[SShaming]

NC because I’m a regular MNer and don’t want people to know!

I have been single for the first time in over a decade.

This past year has been filled with dates, almost relationships and generally testing the waters again.

One of my dating partners turned into a FWB. And recently I met someone who is lovely but a lot younger than me and so I have zero expectations of it turning into anything serious.

I am having no strings sex with both men. Not exactly regularly with either but enough for me to feel that my sex drive is being satisfied.

Neither men have asked to be exclusive and I have been completely upfront that I’m just having fun after a difficult LTR.

However, I told my sister about it and she was really shocked and asked whether I was worried about being a slut!

I was annoyed by her use of language but at the same time wondered if there is something in what she is saying.

Yeah slut is a misogynistic term; your sister is not right to use it.

Assuming you're using protection, sounds like you're having a good time; carry on

Nope, you're not that. If a man was doing it, he wouldn't be given derogatory terms, not at least by other men anyway.

Enjoying safe, consensual sex is fine in my eyes.

No, definitely not a slut.

I do agree with PP though re condoms. A good friend of mine took to online dating with enthusiasm after splitting with her DH in her forties and had lots of fun.

Apparently condoms didn't occur to her and she now has something very unpleasant

Do you think you are a slut? If not, then no. it doesn't matter what anybody else thinks.

Good grief, if you're a slut then that makes me the biggest slagheap in the universe!

You're good OP. Be safe and have fun 😁

You are allowed to do what yo want and in no way at you that word S*!
if you were a man no one would think or say anything about your actions , you go girl and enjoy yourself!! x

Go for it! Enjoy yourself and ignore your (probably jealous) sister. As long as you are honest and no one of getting hurt then what's the problem?!!

That term is sexist bollocks! It's your body and you can shag who you want.

As long as your doing it safely it's your body and your life. However if I'm being honest I think if it was my sister or friend I'd raise an eyebrow if you'd told me you'd had both in one day. But that's just my opinion and not a judgement by any means.

Wow, just come back to this thread and amazed at the positive responses! Thank you!

Definitely using condoms and also everyone got tested before anything happened. But not taking any chances.

I am really just having a bit of fun after over ten long years of bad/no sex. If I meet someone special then I’ll cross that bridge then.

Meanwhile, I’m done with a serious relationship. For now at least.

No a slut.

No woman is a slut.

You are an adult who conducts her sexual life the way that she enjoys it.

Slut needs to be buried, awful, awful word.

Not a slut.
I would say it's the right thing to make sure both men know you are sleeping with others at the same time, but that's just my view. Not being exclusive is a good indication of that, but it's not exactly the same as telling them 'there's another bloke sleeping with me too'.

If they both know this, and are ok with it, then what you do is your business.

Sounds absolutely bloody ideal to me!! As long as everyone is safe and everyone is being honest, who cares. Is she jealous?!

I hate the word slut, it’s awful misogynistic.

If you are dealing honestly and responsibly with your partners that’s no one’s business but your own.

However I do mean “it’s no one’s business”. I find people sometimes overshare about sex.

It’s private, you don’t need to tell her, particularly if she’s going to make you feel bad about yourself.

That’s an awful and misogynistic word.
No, there’s nothing wrong with what you’re doing. Enjoy yourself and the freedom of no stings sex.

No but maybe she's jealous! If they're both men are aware of the situation then there's no problem. However it'd be sensible to get tested regularly even if you're using condoms.

Nope, nothing to worry about at all. I used to do the same (and still would, given the opportunity). It's not how many people you have sex with, it's how you treat them: if you are kind, upfront, courteous etc you can do fifteen men in a night and still be an entirely ethical person.
Whereas someone who claims a moral high ground for having only ever had one sexual partner might be treating that one partner like shit...

Aslong as you are being sensible about your sexual health and assuming you are a grown woman, able to make your own choices, its really no one else business.

Would she called you that if you were a man dating two women? I doubt it.

Horrible word - ignore it. No one has any right to call you anything.

Sounds like you're having fun. Keep having safe fun is my view! If you want a relationship it will come along at the right time. If you don't then just keep enjoying yourself! Your DSis is just jealous! :)

Actually, I'd happily conduct my love life in the same way. I dont want a serious relationship. Casual dating and sex sound pretty good to me.

I’d definitely tell your sister to eff off with her internalised misogyny. You’re happy with your life, the guys you’re seeing are happy with the situation so it’s all good. Don’t let her bring you down.

I have a 23 year old daughter who has the same positive attitude to enjoying sex as you. It is great to read the opinions of those here who support you - you most definitely are not a slut.

It's an obnoxious word that is simply an insult - means nothing, it's just offensive.

I really hope you told her to get fucked
Awful word & no, it doesn't relate to you in the slightest.