Dating thread 130: dates with more issues than Vogue - mad March hares every one of 'em

[BeenThereDating]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread

pudding show us, show us, show us

hello to the newbies and welcome hope this thread keeps you sane and offers a welcomed distraction.

or a welcome distraction, even.

HEy yes I think I should take a break, I had a bad sleep last night which makes me extra emotional which doesn’t help but I am feeling a bit vulnerable, maybe I’ll suspend my wink responses for now. If I’m inactive on the site I get no views, winks or messages, I only get attention if I’ve been online so there’s no risk of anyone contacting me and taking advantage of my low self esteem!
there’s no option to suspend (that I can see) you can only cancel or not.

Oh can I ask another question? I'm a size 16-18 at the moment. I fully accept that's too big for some men. I'm comfortable in my own skin, although I am determined to be healthy by the end of the year. I don't feel bad for being fat. Is there any disadvantage in actually telling men my size early on in the email exchanges, maybe even before I've sent a photo? There's types of men I don't like so I don't see them not being attracted to someone my size as any different. Perspective appreciated.

@been you're right, I do need to, and I'm purposefully not making too many plans for after the next two weeks. Unfortunately my diary filled up without be realising, as well as having a few commitments I have to stick to. So can't really do anything about those.

Interesting to see opinions about when to kiss. I'm with you @esk it feels like kissing a stranger. Those I have kissed on 'first dates' have been those I've been friends with for a few months and it just developed into something more. Glad to hear though that it's not necessarily something that has to be done and I'm not alone in this :D

Pudding ❤️😍❤️

Oh wow Pudding loving Pedro and his free-running!

Falcon I have met many men who prefer larger women, I had a FB for a while who thought I was too skinny as he liked his women a 16+. Everyone likes different things, for me I prefer slimmer men unless they are really tall, covered in tattoos with a beard . I’m a size 10 and it doesn’t get me anywhere, still here waiting for someone to find me atractive inside and out.

Maybe I shouldn't have posted that here, should I get it removed?

Falcon as you rightly say, if you are happy with your size, then that is really all that matters. Look around at your friends and no two people are the same size, so there is someone for everyone. I like big, chunky, rugby player types with short hair - so pretty much the exact opposite of Love!

Remember, one of the rules at the top says "You are a prize" - not matter what your size! (I added the last bit.)

Pudding it is a bit outing!

Falcon I'm a 14 having once been a toned 10. I was nervous at the thought of foisting my curvier body on the dating world but when I did I got a lot of compliments from very attractive men. I'm now in a relationship with a really fit guy who runs and cycles daily and he loves my curves and says so all the time.

been I have asked admin to remove it. I should have sent it in PM ;)

pudding wow! I like a man who can move and he's got some great moves .
Mr Hat is an amazing dancer which is why I find him very attractive.
Margo it was a very good snog with Mr Hat and there was more when I dropped him home. It was difficult to leave.
Not sure about going on date 3 with Mr Eyes. We had a nice time on Sunday but part of me has already discounted him because we have so little in common.

Falcon it's not just you. I'm 50 and I'm fed up of seeing profiles of guys the same age wanting to date women 38-48. I think at my age, that age really doesn't matter that much. I'm happy to date older or younger - all I ask is that they have a bit of life left in them!
And don't worry about your size. I have a friend who jokes that he would never date me, even if I was the last woman left. I'm too skinny for him - I'm size 12, so not that thin. If being thin was important to men then I should have lots of offers but I don't.
If you're comfortable with your size that's all that matters because that is what will give you confidence.

Hold the front page.

Mr Parkour has no intention of meeting up I feel, he just likes to message and get his ego massaged.

But i have a new iron, probably meeting Thursday night. Italian guy here on business, comes every few months. Did I say he was gorgeous?

Falcon I get you have concerns, but own it. Everyone has differing things they like. I have a friend she must be a size 26, she has a much much younger good looking boyfriend who absolutely worships her. I think most men like some curves. I ashamedly read the daily mail (just the comments, don't hate me.....only to have a laugh). The comments for Kelly Brook are always much more complimentary than when it is Davina Mccall. Just saying ;)

I agree that winking isn't lazy imo. I think guys wink at you if they're interested and then once you wink back they message. I wouldn't expect a stranger to write a long message when you may not reply.

Falcon you do know that size 16 is the UK average, don't you?

www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/size-16-36dd-34-inch-10032782

And to echo what pudding said, Kelly Brook > Davina McCall

i missed Pedro

I sent you a pm esk1mo in case you missed it!

Thanks all for the feedback about size.

I'm comfortable in my own skin and probably because I'm back on track with my fitness, I feel better than I have for a very long time. I know that WMLB talks about being confident in your own skin too. I agree with it.

I guess my question really was is there anything bad that can come out of being upfront about it because there are men who don't like a +sized women.

The funny thing I've noticed though is the men who have been said no, and there have been a few have been a bit overweight themselves. Guess they don't want to be labelled fat by insinuation ;)

I always had the impression about winkers is that they did a mass search and just hit wink at anyone within a certain criteria. A bit like someone on Tinder swiping right a lot and then see who comes back to them. Obviously not the case!

Falcon I’m the the same size as you (also working my way back to a 12 at a glacial pace) and it’s not put anyone I’ve met off, far from it; all bar 1 have wanted to see me again.

When I do a search though, the majority of the guys I like the look of are either trying to date younger or thinner. So I’m simultaneously practicing patience and ranting on here

Will catch up properly later, but def PM me Mr Parkour Pud 😈

Falcon, I'm on POF and I have photos up which clearly show my size. I'm very curvy and a size 14/16 depending on the shop. I go to the gym at least 4 times a week and feel fairly body happy. Because I have photos up, no one who likes very slim or petite women is going to contact me because they can see what shape I am. For what it's worth, I have not had one single negative comment about my size/shape.

Even if you didn't want your face showing, could you post a photo of you that has been taken from behind, or with your head down or turned slightly? That way, everyone knows where they stand and you won't need to worry about whether or not your size might be an issue.