Dating thread 130: dates with more issues than Vogue - mad March hares every one of 'em

[BeenThereDating]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread

Love I think I'd prefer a cock shot over DIY close ups . Maybe it was his way of showing you his house in a stealth boast kind of way.

Runs I vaguely recall a recent thread where someone was stood up (after a few good dates) owing to a family member being rushed off to hospital. He never reappeared if I recall. The internet dating basket of excuses is a full old basket with plenty of choice where morals and ethics play no part...

In your shoes I'd not chase and then IF he appears I'd have the twat radar tuned to high.

Jelly don't give up hope. I used to do a few days at a time and then leave it for a bit. It can be bruising but you are in control, so if it is getting too much, leave it for a bit.

Kitten I don't think you can have kissing on a first date as a cut and dried rule. If you didn't feel ready, then its fine not to do it. You are the boss of your body, not anyone else and so it is up to you to decide how and when you feel you want to share a kiss.

So I had 4th date with Mr Wales. It was fabulous. We DTD and it was AMAZING! (I have not had sex for longer than I care to admit!) 5th date booked for tomorrow.

MargoLoveMB Awesome news!!!!!

I really can’t see me ever kissing on a first date. But then I’ve never been on a first date with someone I’ve though PHWOAR about, so who knows.....

Margo really happy for you. And rabidly jealous, obvs.

Cover, if you knew how long my dry spell has been you wouldn't be jealous!!!!! He seems a good person too, just in case you all think I was only after one thing!

love thats so funny 10 photos... jheeze. i can just imagine the replies “uh huh” ... “oh” ...

kitten ive only kissed on one first date, with my ex but we’d known each other in person for months before, and our first date we got drunk. but otherwise, things like going for coffee, really dont get me thinking “mmm lets kiss”. im more interested in seeing if we are compatible personality wise, and can they hold a conversation.

i didnt kiss my current iron properly till our 3rd date. anything before that is like kissing a stranger to me, something you’d do if drunk but not sober.

im seeing MrF tonight after we struggled to meet over the weekend. i guess this is our 6th time meeting. im just going with the flow, i dont know how long he is planning to stay here.

or should i say 6th time meeting outside of the gym..

I am more than happy to initiate a dry spell competition, Margo........
1 year, 1 month and 20 days.
throws down gauntlet

Plus I’m still in it. Woe. Though judging by the offers I’ve been getting on POF I could end it imminently. If I was prepared to significantly lower my standards.....

Margo that's great. Fingers crossed for a brilliant next date.

Hope it goes well tonight Esk1mo.

I usually kiss on the first date if I find them attractive. Mr French and I had probably the most chaste kiss I've ever had on a first date though. He has been messaging a fair bit and they are long messages. I'm not one for endless conversations over text so am just replying as and when I can. Looking forward to seeing him again, though until it actually happens I'm not investing and thought in it.

Cover - don't lower your standards!!!!!! I could double your gauntlet and throw down another one!

Esk1mo - have a lovely date tonight.

Pudding - I don't think you should get back in touch with MrFWB again, tempting though he may be. Onwards!

Hey Daters - Ive been lurking for a couple of months and wanted to de-lurk but to type a half decent message on my phone would mean lots of swear words, autocorrect fails and probably more wine than would be healthy at this time of day - so Ive borrowed works laptop to say Hi and introduce myself!!

I separated from ex of 12yrs last xmas, had a midlife crisis which involved tattoos, piercings, new car, city breaks and getting on pof - had a couple of months of fun dating, looking for something a bit more than fwb but nowt serious and then I met Mr Cockney. Many red flags, lovebombs, future faking and 8mths later I managed to extricate myself just before xmas (theme??) and now I've been back on pof for a couple of months.
Had a fair few dates but other than one big spark leading to 4 dates and an awesome helping of MB's but no repeat order :( I've not met anyone who I've wanted to go on a 2nd date with.

only thing I've got on the cards atm is an old friend from my yoof has found me on pof and we're going out for dinner on sunday - but I'm looking it as a catch up rather than a date (even though he gave me my very 1st MB back in the day as a favour - he was v hot and it was a lovely way to find my appetite

sorry for the epic essay - hope you don't mind me joining in and chipping in with tales of woe and hopefully whoa - it's nice to meet you all

Love that made me laugh, sorry. Stil he might be useful to know if you ever need some DIY

Margo sounds great. And I'm a little jealous.

Cover keep those standards high! I have a friend/one time date that keeps offering to end my dry spell. Tempting but I'm not going there.

esk1mo good luck with your date.

If my cancelled date ever gets in touch again I'll be very very wary of him.
Meanwhile Mr Eyes has asked for date 3.
And I have no problem with a kiss on a first date if I like them. I might've had a full on public snog on the dancefloor with Mr Hat on Sat evening.

Margo high five! All sounds very promising.

cover jeez I thought three months was a lot! I am out with the local cats queening of a night. I am suprised you cannot hear me from the UK :) I don't mind some sexual chat, but not straight away.

Anyway, turns out I am talking to a bit of a celebrity in the Parkour world. Would it be wrong to link it on here? He is so bouncy, like a spring ;) He has the most amazing videos in India, Canada, all over Europe in cities basically jumping around buildings. He is also very naughty.

Hi Barmcake

Runs - was it a good snog with Mr Hat? Love a bit of public snogging now & then. 3rd date with Mr Eyes!!!! How much do you like him?

Thanks all for clarifying the ‘wink’ sitch. I’ll have a look later see if there’s any I can chat to.
I’ll also look up the wink convo on here!
I think I’m just at a low ebb generally, recent unexpected redundancy came out of the blue, I am temping but exhausted with fibromyalgia and small kids and trying to secure a job etc think my self esteem has taken a huge blow, due to exhaustion/ stress/ weather I’ve eaten shitloads and am at my biggest since my post baby heavyweight years.
80 quid right?! I signed up thinking it was for three months at half the price then when i received the acknowledgment it turned out o be six months at 80 something. Some kind of con I reckon but have had so much going on couldn’t be arsed to try and speak to some faceless multinational so have just resigned myself to six months of rejection 🤣
And yes to whoever mentioned it, I’m definitely getting the vibe that I’m in the older age bracket now , I’m getting winks aplenty from boys and grandfathers...

Jelly if your self-esteem is at a low ebb, now may not be the time to be looking to date. I'd suggest working on yourself first or else there is a chance anyone you meet will be of a lower quality than you truly deserve.

Jelly, sounds like you have a lot on your plate at the moment and perhaps adding another person you have to think about and consider may not be the best idea. Can you suspend your dating account for a bit, so that you don't waste the £80 and come back to it, when things have calmed down a bit?

Hello all. I'm new here. Nice to meet you all.

Although I'm in London, it's been a challenge to find the type of relationship I'm looking for at the moment. A guy interested in basically just having fun, and is intelligent and confident and professional. Guys in their late 40s and early 50's often seem to want to date much younger, or maybe it's just the sites I've looked on.

Beginning to wonder if I'm looking for something that doesn't exist, if that makes sense.

I meant to say it was interesting to read Bant's rationale for winking. I've typically ignored winks as it's felt lazy to me.

Guys in their late 40s and early 50's often seem to want to date much younger

I feel so dirty now; why do I like older women!?

Current pessimistic view is that these men need an ego boost but that's probably a bit harsh. I'm a bit jaded. :)

Then again, that's also hypocritical as I wouldn't date a younger man. I like men with life experience..

Thanks Smeaton. Will check it out :)