Dating thread 130: dates with more issues than Vogue - mad March hares every one of 'em

[BeenThereDating]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread

Tinder is on fire today but really I'm just using it as a way to not get over-invested.
Although 4th date for KnottyCaptain this weekend and sleepover after that. All going well.
Trying to chant the "must not give too many fucks" mantra from Amy Young.

Thank you to whoever posted that link. I'm guilty of watching it everyday to keep my fuck-giving in check!!!

tom i felt the same when i read it, it helped me to set some boundaries, and to not go “all-out” for men you barely know!

i actually might re-read it just for good measure.. there’s another one “F**k Him! Nice Girls Always Finish Single”

Haha! Sounds like he'll probably live Humping is actually more often excitement/overstimulation mediated rather than overtly sexual behaviour, which is why kids are often the targets (compared to adults they're noisy, unpredictable, flappy, jump around a lot etc.).

Thanks esk1mo, I’ll look that one up. I agree about not going all out for men you barely know. I’ve definitely been over investing very early on, but won’t be doing that again.

Smeaton that’s true. We are in a rural area, he’s in the village next to mine (I’m right on the edge almost in his village), we are likely to bump into each other, he already spotted me today when I was out. On the other hand it would be good for MB as I could easily pop over to his without having to worry about child care (I can leave my kids for a shot time). Most of my irons have been 20 miles away so it’s been hard to arrange dates, at least I can meet up with him in the local pub.

That was me spring I have a crush on her! Sounds like it's going well and you're chilled :)

Thanks again vet you star!

No worries. I understand dogs far better than I understand men!!

It's so hard keeping up with you! I can't nanecheck you all but thank you so much for confirming my thoughts about finishing things with the guy who didn't want anything physical. I did it yesterday and was told I needed to slow down and maybe 'intimacy could come in a few weeks or a month or two'. It wasn't even just intimacy I wanted - this guy actively avoided sitting next to me in case we touched!

So thank you to everyone - I knew it was the right thing to do but needed the confirmation from you all as you know what it's like. My RL friends looked at me as though I was an idiot for breaking up with someone for that reason, there's a general feeling I'm too fussy I think. I want to tell them all I am the prize!

last

Hello! I was wondering if I could join. I fairly recently ended a 9 month relationship with someone who appeared to be kind and lovely but ended up being a nightmare. We met on Match and had a lot in common but the more I got to know him, the more of a nightmare he became!

I'm trying guardian soulmates and e harmony now. Eharmony appears super frustrating and I can see it is trying to match me with people in high powered jobs (I just happen to be in one now but giving it up very soon) and that's actually not what works with me! I appear to have had no activity - I'm not sure anyone has actually even clicked on my profile and I'm not even quite sure how it works!

Guardian soulmates I'm having a bit more luck and meeting someone tonight for a quick drink after work and chatting with a few other people so fingers crossed.

Sorry to hear some of you have been stung by married men - honestly what are they like!

kin!!!
Yay and thank goodness. Hope you had a fab time and delicious MB were enjoyed. I bet it’s good to feel less hungry again

popcorn absolutely you are not being too fussy and did the right thing! He has a problem I’d say, it goes way beyond just sex. Physical intimacy of all types is a definate must and you deserve to be with someone who loves to kiss, cuddle, snuggle on the sofa, hold hand and MB 10 times a night

Welcome daffo! You have a drinks date today?
Good luck and let us know how it goes!

Kin Great news - 👍

Thanks last and Val - I just need to somehow drive home and do a day's work on no sleep now

Kin hopefully adrenaline will see you through

Do you like her kin? Will you see her again? Is it just FWB type thing or are you dating? #overinvested

kin 🙌🏻🎉🎉

That and coffee Val

Early days yet last but she's certainly interesting and shares some, erm, similar tastes to me

Thanks esk1mo. Oh to be 21 again like you're fella... I was a relative lightweight in comparison

kin you're great what good news!

kin you're great

What are you after? An autograph?

Glad to hear Kin had a good night!

I had a fab 2nd date with Mr Wales. He is very funny & seems lovely. Slight concern that he lives over an hour away. He travels quite a lot for his job and doesn't seem phased by it.

We have 3rd date tonight - but there shall not be MB, even though it was all I could do not to rip his clothes off last night. Trying to set the tone right!

Yay Kin

TomHardy: the WMLB book was a revelation for me...... some things I had been getting right but some things I had been getting so so wrong i was almost shouting at myself as I was reading it..... eye opening.

If you get a chance check out Matthew Hussey too on you tube. He is amazing and has some great advice too x

That’s great margo! Nice to read of some positive stuff happening and decent dates after a run of the crappy posts