Dating thread 130: dates with more issues than Vogue - mad March hares every one of 'em

[BeenThereDating]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread

ignoring Yes I need a dose of "dialasoldier" too .

Morning all

I have just caught up on the thread and found the conversation about ghosting really interesting. I think I am in a minority but I always try to treat people I interact with on OLD as I would like to be treated myself. So if I strike up a conversation with somebody and I just don't feel it I will let them know rather than ghosting. Same when I have a date with a guy I don't ghost them as I don't like it when it happens to me.

So my date with Mr Bull was the biggest anti climax ever and probably the worst first date I have had. He turned up 15 minutes late with no hint of an apology, he was a disappointment in the looks department (his profile pictures are super flattering) and the date just seemed to get worse the longer it went on. One highlight was him explaining in laborious detail his Tinder experiences to date including telling me that he swipes right on everybody and sees what matches he gets back. Obviously, that made me feel really special. He suggested meeting again and I politely declined.

Date with Mr SA has been rearranged for tomorrow but after my experience with Mr Bull I am going more in hope than expectation.

The next few weeks are a bit busy and I won't have much time for dating so not actively trying to instigate new irons at the moment.

I’ve my date with MrMoves later this week, but if that’s a non starter then I’m going to park OLD and half arsedly ride out my Match subscription.

Not feeling it at all right now.

Morning all, as ever so much going on!

Spring - so glad you had a great 3rd date with MrKnottyCaptain

Third - good news about the 2nd date

Kin - are you excited about MB with Miss Keen?

So sorry to hear about the no shows - what rude, wankers those people are.

I have 2nd date with Mr Wales this evening, which shall be dinner. We've had lots of chat & texts over the weekend. He seems keen and decent - so far. I'm a bit excited!!!!

Cover Good luck with your date with Mr Moves. I totally get what you mean about not feeling OLD.

Margo Mr Wales sounds very promising. I hope tonight goes as well as you expect. Look forward to hearing your update from it.

seniorita eugh. God loves a trier though right?

vistaverde I don't ghost as such, but if they don't initiate conversation and I am not totally feeling it I leave it at that. That is only if I haven't met the person though. The first tinder date I had, I wrote to him and told him I liked him etc but there was I didn't feel we had chemistry and left it at that. We still talk as he is a really nice guy.

So I have a few new irons:

Mr Policeman: he is very hot, and seems sweet. Lives 40 miles away. Not sure if it will develop into anything more.

Mr Just come out of a relationship: he was really upfront, said doesn't want anything serious. We have moved to whats app. Again lives an hour drive away.

Mr Frenchie: I like this dude. Will see how it goes.

Mr Mysterious: was talking to this guy for ages but his ,messages have dropped right off, despite supposed to be meeting on Saturday. Not terribly attractive conventionally, but he has something about him.

Mr Dutch/ English: haven't had contact since Saturday, I would meet him again.

Have a nice day everyone. i am so tired, i woke up in the night to the stench of dog diarrohea throughout my house. Then he was sick. Nice way to start a new week!

Cover Fingers crossed that MrMoves is the reason you give up OLD (in a positive way).

Margo What do you think? Will there be dancing after your dinner with Mr Wales?

pud Sounds like some potential among the new irons - can you pick an early front runner yet?

Kin - whoop, whoop! I won't be "dancing" after dinner with Mr Wales, as I like him and want to see if he may have longer-term potential.

pudding - so many irons!!!!!! Who are you meeting first/next?

I think pudding has pinched all the irons and needs to share

I have 2 irons at the moment, I don’t think Mr Camper will turn into anything. Mr local has been messaging a lot and we just drove past each other, he just messaged me to ask if I had seen him as he spotted me (I go to the gym in his town). Still no date though.

Other than that it’s all pretty quite, the odd message from people that are not suitable, live too far away, too young or just not my type. Banging my head against a brick wall. I’m going away in a few weeks for Easter so I might take a break from OLD until I get back unless Mr local asks me out.

Love could you somehow get MrLocal to the ask? I can sometimes guide the conversation to where I say crap like "sounds like we should discuss this over coffee/wine - what do you think?" or "I'd love to see that, when could you show me? (not his dick!)" or if I think they're warm "If you asked me, I would say yes".

Margo Maybe I will see Mr Dutch/ English on Friday, but I am not going to chase him.

Saturday will be Mr Mysterious but if he doesn't seem a bit more enthusiastic this week I might cancel and go have some fun with Mr Frenchie.

The Policeman seems nice, but with his shift patterns, my child care and living an hour away might be tough.

Lets see :)

wow so many posts to catch up on. glad you have all those irons pudding - keep your mind of MrA.

interesting chat about ghosting. im not too fussed if something fizzles out, but id hate for it to happen after DTD. i remember when i moved away for uni , i was in a 4 year relationship (since age 15) and he ghosted me! just didnt reply to me for over 6 weeks, i had to assume i was single.

MrF has just left im slighty hungover and didnt get much sleep, multiple MB, the joys of dating a younger man

hope he doesnt ghost me now ...

Margo you are right, I will try and get a date out of him, I am in his town most mornings so could easily meet for coffee after the gym, he’s self employed and often isn’t at work in the mornings. I forgot I have a date thursday night with Mr Cake, I don’t really want to go so I need a excuse to get out of it. I’m having a tooth pulled out tomorrow so can’t do coffee with Mr local as my mouth will be numb, I might try for wed or thur

esk1mo - clearly a good night with MrF!!!!!! How much younger?

@pudding21
God loves a trier though right?

Sorry, maybe I wasn't clear - he didn't know it was me. The username was hotgurl4u and the photo was of my knees (on these sites you most definitely DO NOT have to put your face, but I did need a photo in order to view other photos or something).

He wasn't trying to get back with me. God forbid!

Anyway, last night on OKC:

1. guy who asks me if I would set aside my principles and see a married guy as a FWB. "You are an intelligent woman, think about it first!" he said. "ooh, patronised by a married man looking for sex on the internet. My life is complete" I replied.

2. a guy I thought I had communicated with before but couldn't quite remember any facts. Started by asking him if he had disappeared before, yes, he said, he took a break from 'this ghastly site'. I told him it was impolite to just disappear and asked if he was always so rude. He said "it's not real life", I said no, I'm a bot, not a real person, to which he replied "sounds about right", so I asked him if he was going to stop being a twat and chat, he said let's chat, I said OK, you first. I get "what exactly are you looking for" - should really have stopped there. Didn't though, chatted a bit, was all very familiar. then I said 'right I'm off to bed' and he replied 'kisses and cuddles to you' - bleurgh!
   And then I remembered. He was the one who, when I signed off to go to bed the last time, sent me inappropriate messages 'knowing' I had gone to bed. And I had removed, blocked and reported him.
   
   So, I reminded him of this and told him never to bother me again. The messages and his profile are gone this morning. I may be blocked I suppose. Thank god.

No replies from either of the guys I contacted first.

After asking on here about the messaging ( will I / won't I ? ) I did send a funny little message and bugger all back . Why go to the trouble of phoning someone, chatting for over an hour THEN asking to meet then you just disappear ? What a knob . His loss !

Bloody that's so annoying. I don't mind someone disappearing if you've only been chatting online but if you've been phoning/meeting then if you contact them again I'd much rather be told that they don't want to continue than be left waiting for a reply that never comes.

margo 7 years but we are both in our 20s so sort of acceptable, ive never even considered someone that much younger before!

bloody what an idiot! surely he’s wasting his own time as well!?

Oh my esk1mo, that makes him 20, 21 or 22, isn't that still 5 times a night territory?! I am tired just thinking about it!!!!!

Just what I want when I’m thinking about jacking it all in: another message from James. He’s stopped working for me though...

isn't that still 5 times a night territory?!

It gets better with age actually Margo - late 40s here and I only need to go to the loo 3 times a night

Cover that message sounds like he's not been in touch before? Is it definitely the same guy?

Kin - very good! MissKeen, will be delighted.

esk1mo 7 years is nowt ;) My ex FWB had the stamina of a lion, I won't tell you what our record over 24 hours was.......

bloody all I can imagine when they do that is they are talking to more than one person at the same time and hedge their bets. None the less its annoying and rude!

Mr Not looking for anything serious is getting more interesting. he wasn't really on the radar last night.

pudding tell me, i want to know

margo yes, hes 21