Every time I read a thread like this one it reminds me that I want to start a thread about the embarrassing things we thought/expected when the kids were young which when they’re older make us cringe. Not pfb stuff but stuff we had expectations about.
When my DC was small I was horrified that my SIL appeared not to be interested in him because she didn’t ask after him that much, didn’t remember important things etc etc, in retrospect she was childless and it really wasn’t that important in the scheme of things because however perfect I think my child was they weren’t that important to other people because A, they’re not their child, and B, most of this stuff isn’t that important in the scheme of things.
And now my SIL has children of her own and real life issues to deal with, and I think about how I reacted because of how I thought she should have reacted and it’s embarrassing.
A one year old doesn’t know that they’re a one year old. They don’t know and they don’t care. The party, the birthday, the cards, the memories are all for your sake not his. And probably even when they’re two they won’t understand that much.
But what’s important is the relationship which your children develop with their family over time, you know, a lifetime.
My teenager would laugh now if I told him the expectations I had when he was a baby and he’d think I’d lost the plot. 
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PS: I don’t have any of his first birthday cards - they were cards, lovely at the time, but who were they for.....???