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Original poster

BF won a fortune..and dumped me.

106 replies

HennaTattoo · 15/02/2018 21:56

So that's pretty much it. We've been an item for a couple of years now. He's been in and out of jobs and I've bailed him out and loaned him money more often than I can remember. I've supported him through depression. I have 3 children and work part time so couldn't really afford to feed him and loan him money. But I did because I loved him.
He gave me the speech about it wasn't working for him and the timings not right etc. I found out that on the morning before he finished with me, he'd won £220,000. I cannot believe it. I feel like I've been punched. He's obviously used me all this time, I thought he loved me. He's bragging about how he can " think of himself now rather than other people". I feel sick.

OP posts:
Parrish · 15/02/2018 21:57

So sorry. But you are well rid of the cock lodger.

LizB62A · 15/02/2018 21:59

You'll recover financially - he'll always been an arse though and I'd bet money that he'll burn through that £220k really quickly

Just remember how you feel now if he comes crawling back saying he's made a terrible mistake and loves you really.....

FuckItPassMeTheWine · 15/02/2018 21:59

Karma will catch up with him OP, it's real . Secondly him winning the money has done you a massive favour as it's shown you his true colours otherwise you could have wasted more years and more money supporting this man. You've had a lucky escape from that arsehole FlowersWinexx

LovingLola · 15/02/2018 22:00

I think be glad for your children's sake that he is out of their lives. He sounds like a total loser.

greendale17 · 15/02/2018 22:01

I guarantee OP that he will blow the lot and be back to being broke within a year

hollowtree · 15/02/2018 22:04

I don't even know what I would do if I were you! I'd want to rip his face off.

Don't do that though- easier said than done.

Like PP have said you have actually had a lucky escape

ThePinkOcelot · 15/02/2018 22:04

What a bastard!

GeekyWombat · 15/02/2018 22:07

You’ve had a lucky escape but I’m sure it doesn’t feel it now. He clearly didn’t tell you about the win, who did? Are you sure it’s true?

bunbunny · 15/02/2018 22:17

I'd send him an invoice for all the times that he's taken money or food or whatever from you (particularly when you couldn't afford it). You did it because you were in love and thought it was mutual. If he was just using you then he should repay his debts.

Or you could really freak him out - did he still owe you any money at the point that he bought the winning ticket/made the winning bet/did something that involved spending a little money to win a lot? In which case, I'd argue that it was a joint expense as it was partly your money that paid for it (because if they owe people money it's not right that they fritter it on basically gambling in the hope that they win big - ok so it worked for your dp but it doesn't in the huge majority of cases) and thus you should have half of it.

OK so you might not see a penny but would be nice to give him a scare in the mean time - and if you get anything from him it would be a bonus that you deserve after he has treated you so badly...

Thistlebelle · 15/02/2018 22:19

Make sure you don’t take him back.

Ever

pigshavecurlytails · 15/02/2018 22:22

You'll have the last laugh. that money will be gone in a year and you can enjoy not taking him back.

speakout · 15/02/2018 22:24

That was lucky for you OP.
He will blow the money in 18 months and be back to square won.

That win has done you a big favour in allowing you to see his true colours and getting him out of your life.

You are the winner here.

BastardGoDarkly · 15/02/2018 22:24

Oh, what a cunt.

Honestly though, this is a blessing in disguise.

Flowers
GertNBert · 15/02/2018 22:25

Lucky escape.

(I think you were a bit daft spending money on him when you couldn't afford especially when you have kids. ).

Original poster
HennaTattoo · 15/02/2018 22:25

He did tell me about the win. Can't say what exactly as it's pretty outing but sad to say it's 100% true. I said Id been used. He just told me he'd helped me as well!! Can't even think how. I was too upset to talk really, and he had this oh so smug look, just awful. I can't believe it.

OP posts:
Mrsramsayscat · 15/02/2018 22:28

If I could, I would "like" fuckitpass's comment!

MrsZippyLake · 15/02/2018 22:29

It might not feel like it right now but you've had a lucky break. Good riddance to bad rubbish!!

abilockhart · 15/02/2018 22:30

I have 3 children and work part time so couldn't really afford to feed him and loan him money. But I did because I loved him.

It's a very good day for your kids that this loser has bolted.

Poppiesway1 · 15/02/2018 22:30

My exdp inherited well over 300k and blew it all with nothing to show for it. We had started to get back together just before he inherited the money, suddenly he went off again, started going out with a much younger colleague, very long holidays in Australia and Mexico, brought an Audi TT.

never gave a penny to our DC, has never paid any maintenance or contributed to our dc. And no longer has any money and has started to ask to borrow money from me!!

You are well rid. May not feel like it but he won’t drag you down any more and has shown his true colours. Just like my ex. I don’t know what I was thinking when I’d agreed to try again!!

CharisMater · 15/02/2018 22:34

How sickening. But he was always this crappy person, a user, now you get to start the next phase of your life sooner.

I don't blame you for being upset though!

NoKnownFather · 15/02/2018 22:34

That's a low way act, so sorry for you Henna no wonder you can't believe it! At least you has shown his true colours and as other's have said, I think the money will be gone within a year too....please don't take him back when the time comes.

At least you can hold your head high as you stood by him during rough times. Be kind to yourself you did nothing wrong.

RidingWindhorses · 15/02/2018 22:37

The win has done you a favour: shown you his true colours.

VaguelyAware · 15/02/2018 22:37

A lot of people who win relatively large amounts on the lottery, tend to lose it quickly. Your XP sounds like he has very little financial sense or thought for the future, he'll likely burn through it pretty quickly. His smug face won't last... keep your head up, don't let him see you're upset any more, & you will be fine. He might not be, he sounds like a right idiot.

UpstartCrow · 15/02/2018 22:38

Bide your time. He's shit with money and people, so unless he buys himself a whole new personality, he'll be someone's cocklodger again at some point.

Think about how you will blow him off when he comes back and says 'Look, hear me out, what it is, is...'

GummyGoddess · 15/02/2018 22:40

He's been in and out of jobs, he's going to burn through all that money very quickly and be broke and jobless within a few years. Back to square one, but he won't have a girlfriend who loves and supports him so his situation will actually be worse.

Ignore for now and make a mental note to check in a year or so. I'm certain that I will be proven right and you can then have the last laugh if he doesn't try to worm his way back into your life before then.