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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dilemma on this weird Tinder situation

482 replies

Tyrianstoe · 13/01/2018 17:34

Had to nickname change as I'm a regular and to be fair I'm embarrassed. Split up with my ex 2 weeks ago (his fault, broke my trust) and in a fit of anger and suspicion set up a Tinder account on Thursday night to see if he's on there as that's where we met. Anyway, was swiping through and I saw this lovely looking guy who had a very funny profile that mentioned a very obscure band that I love so swiped guiltily right. Don't know why I feel bad because my ex is a lying arsehole, but I'm aware it's too soon. This guy messaged me! So I said 'I like that band loads, nobody has heard of them' and we swapped messages. Then I thought I'm being a bit of a dick here so I deleted my Tinder but said if he wanted to message me off there he could and gave him my number. Thinking he wouldn't.

He found me on WhatsApp. He was telling me about his little boy who is going for an assessment for a disability, I write the assessments as a job so he was asking me what to expect. Then, this is where it gets weird...he asks me where I come from. Told him. He's from the same town. Not too weird. So asks where I live now, I live in another town not far away. He moved to my town 5 days ago. This morning he mentioned he lived opposite an emergency services station. So do I. He told me the name of his street. My house looks onto that street! I can see his house from mine.

So I do t know whether this is just too bizarre and I stop messaging him but...I don't want to! He seems sound. He doesn't use any words on my banned list, is retraining to do a job I'd love to do, likes the same music, doesn't put xxx on anything, doesn't use lol and doesn't call me Hun/babe Grin I'm mad aren't I? This has got big fat rebound all over it. But my interest is piqued. Slap me with a wet fish!

OP posts:
CheapSausagesAndSpam · 14/01/2018 11:39

This is ace! It's like something from a Helen Fielding novel where everyone lives conveniently close to one another!

WellThisIsShit · 14/01/2018 12:04

Yay! That sounds great Xmas Grin

To the posters who think it sounds to many coincidences and is therefore stalker-ish, I am being slow but I don’t get it?

Where does the evil intent happen exactly? Confused probably missing something extremely obvious but in bemused!

WellThisIsShit · 14/01/2018 12:05

Oops sorry, that was my last Christmas hat emoji of the season, it being mid January now!

MyOtherProfile · 14/01/2018 12:12

Wow this is great. Sounds like you could be good mates at the very least.

Heartofglass12345 · 14/01/2018 13:07

I love this! Grin
I came out of an 8 year relationship with someone who would not commit. I was like right i'm just going to have fun, not interested in anything serious.
I joined POF and after about 2 months of being single, met someone on there who was probably the nicest man i've ever met. He really liked me, i liked him but wasnt ready for anything serious so let him down gently as i knew he was looking to settle down.
A couple of weeks later i thought, hang on now, stop being a dick! So i messaged him and the rest is history! We got married a year after we met, and our son was born a week later!
That was nearly 5 years ago, we have another son and i'm so glad i met him!

Tyrianstoe · 14/01/2018 13:17

Awww heartofglass that's a lovely story!

OP posts:
Tyrianstoe · 14/01/2018 13:18

We have been messaging on and off all day and we have so much similarity in our lives. Even down to our insomnia. He's so open. I wonder I this is what he's always like?

OP posts:
hesterton · 14/01/2018 13:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tyrianstoe · 14/01/2018 13:37

Yes, you are right. I'm going to back off a bit until Tuesday. I feel a bit apprehensive about the coincidences. They are so weird.

OP posts:
DNB · 14/01/2018 13:41

I don’t think “run” when I read this either! I’d be excited and quite like the coincidences but that’s just me ... have fun! Smile

OverTheParapet · 14/01/2018 13:54

Following for blatant Ginger Date Success Grin

mytoesaregettingfatter · 14/01/2018 14:02

Oh I love this!! I hope you get married and live happily ever after with lots of chubby ginger babies.

I met my dh at an office job in a city. Turned out he grew up in a house right behind my school. He went to a different school but knowing the proximity of how close we were in our town was weird!

MoNigheanDonn · 14/01/2018 14:11

Following cos I'm nosy Grin good luck op!

ru345 · 14/01/2018 14:24

Definitely go for it! I joined pof Boxing Day met guy 2nd Jan! We lived in the same street had the same (unusual) and colour car went to the same pubs and clubs at same time when younger like the same foods etc and we are already exclusive (is that the name for leaving OLD and not looking for someone else?). The more time we are spending together the more we are finding out we experienced same things lived in same street how weird as not big! It's only 12 days but 4 dates and feels like I have known this guy for years....go and meet your Mr Right! But want a full report back here!!!

DeathByMascara · 14/01/2018 14:26

Ginger love 😍

LittleMouseontheDairy · 14/01/2018 15:57

‘Nom nom’ is awful too. I think my relationship with an ex died the day I first read him use that phrase over text.

Good luck! Sounds positive...

VivaLeBeaver · 14/01/2018 16:07

This sounds promising. I married my rebound date.

Tyrianstoe · 14/01/2018 16:32

And anyone who uses 'Bants'.

I would not be able to contain my dagger eyes!

OP posts:
gingerbreadmam · 14/01/2018 16:47

Loving this thread. Good luck for Tuesday op although it doesn't sound like you need it.

I wonder if you are local to me from your posts and banned words.

prettywhiteguitar · 14/01/2018 17:03

I'm #excited ! You are so #blessed he is your neighbour!! Go for it Hun !

I have to suck it up when some very good friends of mine use hun, I love them and I don't understand why they use it in text and WhatsApp, one of them is s primary school teacher #wtf

rememberthetime · 14/01/2018 17:21

Don't worry about coincidences...they are what draw us to people in the first place.

My partner and I couldn't believe the coincidences when we met. similar interests, love of the same sport, similar attitudes to family, going out, politics etc.

But the one that really got us was that I grew up in another country in a suburb with the exact same name as the suburb he grew up in on the other side of the world.

Its the weird coincidences that are the best ones.

Smithm59 · 14/01/2018 17:27

I would be worried that this guy has stalker like qualities. It seems a bit wired that he moved to ur town and same address

MyBrilliantDisguise · 14/01/2018 17:29

He didn't move there because of her, Smith. He happens to be living near her.

DriggleDraggle · 14/01/2018 17:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

luckiestgirl · 14/01/2018 17:56

It’s bantz actually I think

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