I can't forget about a guy I met on holiday?

[gaynor83]

I went on holiday a couple of months ago, and met a really great Australian guy. We met up a few times, really got on and there was amazing chemistry. We did have sex, I wouldn't usually but I figured it may be the only chance we would get.
I just figured it was a holiday fling.
He added me on Facebook, and when we got home we chatted loads for a few weeks and he was really keen to Skype too.
Then it petered out and after a few weeks I messaged him..he replied but took ages. Seemed still friendly and chatty but as he took so long I let the conversation end, I didn't want to bug him.
I just can't stop thinking of him, and miss chatting to him so much. He's constantly online on Facebook and it really hurts that he doesn't message me or respond quickly as he used to.
I know it's so silly as he is so far away...but I can't help how I feel 😓.
I've got family near where he lives, I'd been considering visiting and letting him know I'd be around..would just love to see him again. I know I should let it go...but would it seem really weird to him if I told him I was thinking of visiting, and see what he says?
I'm not usually like this, but I just don't want to let it go.

I think you should stop focusing so much energy on him. You don´t need to block him or defriend him or anything like that. Just stop contacting him and let him sit there on your friends list doing nothing. Focus on other stuff going on in your life instead. Then, sometime in the future, if you decide to go to Australia, you can send him a message and ask if he´d fancy meeting up. Maybe at that time he will. If you push him for contact now, he won´t.

Maybe go to Australia anyway don't tell him but make a point of posting hot pics of yourself there on the beach on facebook..make him jealous and annoyed you didn't tell him

He really didn't seem the type to just have girls lined up, but I suppose I don't know him well.
Well if I do go there it won't be until March or so. Maybe I'll hit him up if I do.
I guess he probably thinks nothing would come of it, so what's the point. Maybe that's true,but it seems a shame. He also has family here, and will be visiting them next Christmas, he said.

He is a bit younger than me,and I thought he was really attractive!

I’d put him out of your mind for now, maybe even have a break from men for a bit and then start fresh when you feel ready!

I understand it’s hard the love of my life lives in Sydney atm so it won’t work for me either.

Sorry to hear that. It's just so bloody far away isn't it.

It sounds like a nothing to lose type of situation and long distance relationships require honesty so I reckon I’d probably just ask him straight out. “I really like you and I enjoyed our time together so much, I know it sounds crazy given we’re so far away but do you think there is any chance of this turning into something more long term?”
If he says no, at least you’ll know. And if he says look me up when you’re in town then at least you know to get in touch with him if you do go there in future.

I'm just a bit shy to say that to him...maybe I will pluck up the courage though.
I think he would be happy if I went there, but I don't want to do it if he's lost interest.
Think maybe I'm leave off the contact for now, see if he does, and decide later.

Have you said to him “I miss you?”
Maybe try that and see how it goes down.

We only really spent a couple of days together so I don't want to seem full on...might try that in a little while though if we don't end up talking ...

Oh god please don't do that!

Plenty of uni students have holiday shags that it's no big dea to add to social media.

I think it was something different to him than what it was to you.

I think you need to let it go. Seriously.

I honestly don’t think you should, I don’t think it’ll do you any favours especially if you’re rejected OP

I really wouldn´t send him a message asking if he is missing you or confessing feelings on anything like that. If he felt the same, the contact would still be there. He has moved on. Let it go.

Clearly you do better with meeting men naturally in real life, rather than online. Plus, you want to travel. So challlenge yourself to go backbacking in a country you want to see (not Australia) and sign up for activity weekends in the UK. Join clubs for things you'd like to be able to do - scuba diving, tennis, canoeing... whatever takes your fancy. You just might meet another man who is your type. For something casual or more. But at least he'll be in the same country.

Sounds like you're going to go. It's very obvious that he's not interested.
Prepare yourself then for some major hurt. An extensive cockup is on the horizon for you, you poor deluded child.

Ah. I had thought it was more than a couple of days. In that case sorry but it’s a very different story.

Of course he's perfect, and amazing, and attractive and didn't seem the type for casual sex.
You spent a couple of days with him, he could be whatever.
Maybe he really is great, but he lives on the other side of the world and its never going to happen.

Do yourself a favour, log him firmly in your nice memories and move on.

Yeah all right @MrSnrubYesThatsIt.... I think she gets it.

Find someone local and tangible who is there in the flesh.

Thanks for being so nice...most of you :)
I'm not deluded, I'll not be going.
Guess it's just something else to put down to bad experience. Really should stop putting my heart on the line, but it's hard when it's the way you're made.

Was it a ‘ bad experience’ though? Did he promise to run away with you and live happily ever after?
Can’t you just be happy about the fun you had? :)

Sorry, how long did you actually know him??

No I guess it wasn't a bad one, I've just been giving myself the hard time really.
Just knew him for a couple days whilst away, then a few weeks of chatting online when we came back. Nothing really. I'm just quite an emotional person it's not good really.

You didn't know him at all then!

Honestly, for your own sake you need to see this for what it was - a holiday shag.

It's a fun memory! Something to remember fondly (unless he was rubbish). And that's it!

MrSnRub you can put your claws away now fucking hell