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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Battling on!

981 replies

lollipop7 · 31/10/2017 20:06

So I'm starting a new thread following on from 0I don't know what to do" as we're almost full.
Blimey! How did that happen!

Seems lots of you are rather ruddy marvellous and want to keep going on this journey with me so I'm opening a new chapter.
Will be back with a proper update later 💐

OP posts:
Original poster
lollipop7 · 12/01/2018 21:11

I also started Freedom Programme today.
I loved it. My group is fabulous and I think I will make lifelong friends

OP posts:
Sadmum23 · 12/01/2018 21:47

Glad interview went well - even if it does not result in a job interview the experience is useful. Brilliant that you have started Freedom
programme, this will give you confidence. Onwards and upwards - stay strong . You will look back on this time and think did you do but realise it was part of your journey to a better life.

Original poster
lollipop7 · 12/01/2018 22:10

@Sadmum23 💐
Thank you. I have a feeling you are right

OP posts:
Bekabeech · 13/01/2018 04:20

Two lots of good news today/yesterday.

Being brave is often just struggling on (that or stupidity).

Original poster
lollipop7 · 13/01/2018 07:37

Just gone on eBay and he’s selling my jewellery. Including my, engagement ring which I wanted to keep for my daughter.

Such a toad.

OP posts:
GrabbyMcGrabby · 13/01/2018 08:05

That's shitty. Can you report them as stolen goods to eBay?

Original poster
lollipop7 · 13/01/2018 08:14

I’ve told the police.
He was warned not to do this as he’d be charged with theft and he has gone ahead regardless

He’d flog his grandmother if he could

OP posts:
MrsBertBibby · 13/01/2018 08:32

Screenshot taken?

Original poster
lollipop7 · 13/01/2018 08:36

Yes.
Several.

😡😡😡🤬🤬🤬🤬😡😡😡😡

OP posts:
RandomMess · 13/01/2018 08:52

You can also report to EBay quote the police reference number. However perhaps if they are sold via eBay you stand a better chance of getting them back than some cash down the pub job!

MrsBertBibby · 13/01/2018 08:57

What a massive shit he is Lollipop.

Idontmeanto · 13/01/2018 09:30

😢 I thought the police were all set to supervise recovery of your stuff from the house. Is there any chance of speeding this up, even if stuff goes into storage?!

Original poster
lollipop7 · 13/01/2018 09:54

I’m getting that done in February now. The police are helping me and will be there on the day.

In a way I’m actually hoping he manages to flog some of it then he will be in hot water. He was told at interview he’d be charged with theft if he pulled a stunt like this.

It’s the second engagement ring he’s put up on eBay in seven years. That should tell you something.
#missedthatredflagdidnti 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

OP posts:
Slingsanderrors · 13/01/2018 10:52

missedthatredflagdidnti

Hindsight is a wonderful thing lollipop, but he’s digging himself deeper and deeper into a hole. Give him enough rope.........

Mustang27 · 13/01/2018 11:02

It's not that you missed it they are just so good at twisting it and making everything you do their fault when you are in their space all the time. Only the clarity of being away from their constant poison lets you see how bad it is.

Let him do his thing and it will only further cement how much of a shit he is. His daughter won't forgive him for that.

rainbowstardrops · 13/01/2018 11:28

He’s continuing to stoop to new lows - the stupid arse.
Let him dig himself his hole and eventual he'll fall in. Angry

dizzy174 · 13/01/2018 13:04

have you heard from his employer yet lolli? I agree with previous posters in that if you give him enough rope he will hang himself! and doing a pretty good job so far.

Original poster
lollipop7 · 13/01/2018 13:07

They’re investigating the matter currently, @dizzy.

It’s amazing how flagrant his behaviour is

OP posts:
Ellie56 · 14/01/2018 00:40

He must be deranged. Nobody of sound mind is that stupid are they?

QueenDaisy · 14/01/2018 10:51

How much investigating do they need to do, he went on Paternity Leave quite a few months after you’d left him, he certainly wasn’t looking after you or baby lollipop while he was off work.

Idontmeanto · 14/01/2018 11:35

I suspect it’s something so rare it’s not in an HR handbook. Especially with legal stuff still in progress. He can probably argue that taking time to work with his solicitor on getting his paternity acknowledged is looking after the baby, until it’s proved otherwise😢

Original poster
lollipop7 · 14/01/2018 12:32

When completing the four you have to state you are not on,y the child’s biological father but that you are also going to be actively looking after / bonding with the baby during that period and that you are in an enduring intimate or family relationship with the child’s mother.

So two out of those three boxes he ticked in full knowledge that he was not eligible.
To me it’s a clear case of fraud and gross misconduct, which is summary dismissal

But he - like most of these abusers are - seems to have as many lives as a cat.

My prediction is tomorrow that

  • the police tell me the CPS decided he won’t be charged with anything
  • I find out I didn’t get the job
  • he keeps his job
  • some more random shit hits the fan...

Still I’ve had plenty of practice.

Also I need help for a new thread title. Votes please on

  • The Saga Continues
  • Cometh the Hour Cometh the Lollipop. (My personal favourite. Laced with irony 😂)
  • FFS How Come He’s Still Standing?
  • Doing it for the Kids

Or any other suggestions welcomed as I am starting Thread Three later today!

OP posts:
Idontmeanto · 14/01/2018 12:34

Definately cometh the hour cometh the Lollipop! There will be no need of irony by the end😘

MushroomSoup · 14/01/2018 12:42

I agree. That’s your title!

dizzy174 · 14/01/2018 13:49

me too!