Husband spying on me

[Crazycake]

Dh has been asking every day this week if there's been any parcels in the post, when I've asked what he's waiting for he's been very aloof. I went on the laptop yesterday (shared computer) and he'd sent an email to amazon asking where his parcel was. I have never had a reason to snoop but something didn't sit right. I put the link into the search bar in google and he's ordered what looks like a USB stick but it's a motion detector spy cam with sound. I don't know what to do!

It might not be for you...is he having any troubles at work?

Can you ask him? How he reacts would be telling

What do you think he'll say when he reads this thread?

That's a good point. He may be monitoring what you post on here.

Are you sure he intends to spy on you?

Perhaps it's someone else? Someone at work?

It maybe for someone else to spy on. Get one for yourself as well.

We went out for dinner last night and he outright lied to me. I asked him what he was waiting for and he said it was a USB stick, he said his old one keeps wiping his work!

So now what, @Crazycake?

You have some very serious thinking to do.

He knows all of my passwords, I have nothing to hide.

That isn't the point.....the point is respectful boundaries and personal space/privacy

I doubt he thinks you're cheating or the like.....more like he gets a perverted thrill at the thought of watching your every move, hearing every word without you knowing.
Like the men who take nude pics/videos of their partners without their consent whilst they're asleep, there is no reason why they do it.
They do it for the kicks, the sense of power and control it gives them to be a fly on the wall, knowing every tiny thing you do, being privy to your most personal/private conversations with friends/family/gp etc.

Any info gleaned will be used to manipulate you because they're already 'one step ahead' of you and have had time to formulate their plan.
It can be used to gaslight you.

If he's cheating/planning on leaving you then this 'insider' info would be invaluable to him.

You'd never be able to trust your instincts/intuition regards him because he'd have beat you to it and learnt how to cover his tracks

He's basically violating the last bit of personal space/privacy you have - and he's point blank lying to you about it.
He doesn't value you as an individual with her own rights and freedoms cos he owns you in his warped mind.

Do you have any issues/problems in your relationship?

He's lying to you - and either planning to spy on you or somebody else.
Yuck. Have my first ever LTB.

Wow. That is one creepy lying spying guy.

Also... this is a small thing, but you seem to use the word "snoop" when you talk about the possibility of looking at his stuff. But when he does it, you just call it "looking through my phone."

If you've been with him 10 years then I'm worried you may see his behaviour as much more normal than it actually is. This guy is scary.

Maybe he doesn't know it's a spy USB? I have ordered things in the past and have ended up ordering the worng thing.

Maybe he doesn't know it's a spy USB?

Of course he knows!

Well, now you know what to look out for, you'll be aware of it and can take your time deciding what to do. It may pop up in your house, or he may have a reason to use it at work. When you see it you'll have a better idea what he is worrying about.

Of course he knows!

How do you know did he tell you?

This is very odd. I wonder if he has keylogger on your laptop? I agree with PP you need to get it checked out, or better still, buy your own bloody laptop, and don't tell him the password.

Are you sure he hasn't read this thread?

Does he have any reason to suspect you are up to anything?

Why immediately LTB? He could be one but he may have different reasons to do it and doesn't want to involve his wife in it. As he is so secretive, I would suggest OP to change all her passwords.

Errr... yes, he knows.

He ordered it.

It will have been a hell of a lot more expensive than a USB stick and will have had its description IN THE TITLE.

He has been utterly shifty about it all week according to the OP.

Dextersilver, your planet sounds lovely and I would like to visit it sometime. But the rest of us are stuck on this one.

Well I guess it's a wait and see thing then. It will come to light soon I hope OP. Fingers crossed all is good.

Are you sure that he hasn't simply ordered, very quickly, what he believes IS a simple USB stick?

Until he lied to you i had thought maybe he was ordering it for a friend. Possibly their suspicious of their partner and know they couldn't have it delivered to their house or share their amazon account. So gave the money to your partner to order it. Could of been why he was so antsy about it arriving if friend keeps asking him.

Until he lied. Now all bets are off you need to check his account and seee when its arriving and be there.

You don't think he's going to set it up secretly in the bedroom to film you and him/porn, and release it on the internet, or blackmail you, do you?

Does he watch porn? Is he in a, you show me yours and I'll show you mine "Readers' Wives" group? Omg.

My skin is crawling, I think you should be very, very careful.
Make plans to run.

Cancel the order on amazon. If the parcel comes throw it away.

What sort of work is he in? I'm aware of a 'massage therapist' who was filming himself abusing his clients without their knowledge.

Either that or he is planning to use it without your knowledge, neither of which are attractive prospects.

The only possible explanation of this which wouldn't be creepy is if they were experiencing thefts at work and it was an effort to catch the culprit. But if that was the case why lie?

Id change all your passwords and i'd check if his still work. Also check for key logger on your pc. Good luck!

Wait until it comes, plug it in and wave and say "your parcel is here"