My partner is going to get us evicted because of dog mess in the garden

[SomeRandomGuy]

Hey all,

Long story short been with my partner 9 years. 5 years ago we were approached and asked if we wanted to rescue to staffies. I'm not a dog person, never have been, but my partner fell in love with them. So, I agreed to introduce dogs into our family provided the dogs care was down to her.

She agreed.

Fast forward 1 year later and our garden is full of dog poop. Every time I asked her to clean it she would complain her back hurts, or she's had a busy day. She doesn't work, and about all she does is walk down the road to get food and take the kid to school which is around the corner. She sometimes washes up and cleans the house but most times she's watching Jeremy Kyle or sleeping.

She wasn't always like this. But the past 2 years she has been.

We got evicted form our private rented place because of the dog mess. Neighbors complained to our landlord and the landlord warned us to clean the dog mess. My partner done nothing about it.

We got a new property and I begged her to keep ontop of the dog mess. She said she would. But this didn't happen. Been here 2 years and she has cleaned the garden twice.

We had rats living in our entry because of the poop and next door have rats too because of the mess in our garden. Today the rat man from the council came to install rat traps in her garden and took photos of our garden.

I urged my partner to sort the garden out but it's just exploded in arguments. It's my fault apparently for not helping her around the house. The arguments are silly.

But, we're now about to be evicted if this isn't sorted. She's still sat downstairs watching TV not even interested.

We have a 10 year old, and he's got to go through all this.

I called the council myself and explained that I don't want to be evicted and that the problem is my partner doesn't want to clean up her dogs mess.

Some might say why don't I clean the mess. I'm not a dog person. I puke even going near poop. Call me a whimp, but that's one of the reasons why I refuse to have dogs. The agreement was I'd be happy with them in our family so long as she keeps ontop of them.

They sit in their crate all day. One limps because they rarely go for walks. I begged her to give them to someone who can look after them but once again another argument.

Please , any advice? I can't even speak to her about this calmly without her kicking off and blaming me in some way.

Do you know who gave her the rescues? She's done a crap job of looking after them. I'd be contacting them and telling them you're worried about the dogs. Being in love with a dog is not enough, the care is even more important. Those dogs need to go back to rescue. Your oh is not good enough. And if this was happening in my house id be livid at her.

they are part of your family dynamic and you need to step up and take care of them

No they aren't. They are the DP's hobby. She has decided not to look after them. Its her responsibility.

You don't take on living things that need a lot of care and then decide someone else can do it instead.

MrsDV, because he's been living there all that time while she's mistreated those dogs. He should have reported her long ago. If she wouldn't clear the mess, he should have done - he lived there, too. He could have left years ago but didn't - he preferred to stay and to moan about it.

I have 3 small dogs and I clean our garden a minimum of every other day

me too but I dont expect my OH or DCs to do it for me.

What are you going to do about the immediate issue of eviction? If you're joking tenants then you are both responsible. If she won't sort it out then you will have to, either yourself or pay someone to clear it this time. You can't have a second eviction against you because of something that is easily sorted.

Actually yes, it's probably beyond one person now- you need a professional.

Fucking hell, bin her and re home the dogs ! She sounds awful !!

Is this a genuine thread? I wonder.....

If it is, OP you are a grown man with animals in your care, regardless of whether you chose them or not, so you are complicit and responsible for their neglect too. Neither of you wants to clean up after them and neither of you do - you have chosen not to, so you have actively made a choice to neglect. To be honest, you deserve to be evicted.

Phoning the RSPCA was the right thing to do. You are clearly not capable of looking after these dogs and why it's taken this thread to make you realise I really cannot fathom. The sooner the dogs go, the better. You may be prosecuted for neglect.

If the dogs go (and if they don't) you must get the garden cleaned. There are 2 options;

1. You or partner or both of you do it. There is to be no blaming the other and failing to take responsibility.
2. YOu pay someone to come and do it.

Either 1 or 2 MUST happen. If neither of you will do it, you must pay up. If you don't do this, then any chance of avoiding eviction will be removed.

Do not get any more animals of any description.

Issues to do with your relationship with partner are something else altogether. You need to take responsibility for the garden and the dogs because you are an adult and they are your responsibility - no leaving it to the other person. Man up!

Sounds like something on the dog rescuers programme.
Clean up the mess for your kids sake and sign over the dogs to the RSPCA.

Is this real?

If you really really can't clean it up, pay someone to do it. Getting evicted from your second home and dragging a child through that for the sake of not pick up dog poo.

Beg to differ the First MrsDV, he agreed to the dogs, so he needs to step up and take responsibility as well. Bloody hate twats who think they can absolve responsibility for another living creature because they made it clear they wouldn't be poo picking because they didn't want a pet. You agree to a pet you take joint responsibility or have the guts to say no to your partner.

God i am so glad you called the rspca. Reading about those dogs actually made my eyes well up. Please let us know what happens to them.

Is this a wind up? Surely if there is so much poop your dogs must be treading on it and walking shit in to your home every time?

Your DC cannot play in the garden. Your DP watches Jeremy Kyle all day. And you're allowing all this to happen.

This must be a joke. If not you'll soon be featuring on your partners favourite show.

I agree that both are responsible.

You couldn't refuse to feed a child because you hadn't wanted to have one. If you found yourself in the home with a child present, and if someone else isn't feeding them, you are responsible to do so. It is being a grown-up, rather than a responsibility refuser.
You wouldn't refuse to change a babies nappy because you don't like poo....and this is the same.

OP needed to either refuse to have the dogs or once they were there, accept responsibility for them too. His partner has turned out to be neglectful, but so has he.

My mind boggles at adult behaviour which refuses all responsibility, especially towards other living beings. Presumably, if any of these dogs died or has died, OP would somehow think he bore no responsibility for it. If his kids or anyone else caught a horrible illness due to the dog poo, presumably he wouldn't think he had any role to play in it all. Amazing.

But he has called the RSPCA (assuming this whole thread is real in the first place) so that is a good thing.....better late than never.

And OP sorry, but you sound like the neighbours from hell!

You're sitting there waiting for your mum to come and rescue you...
If only the poor 10 year old had that option

What happened 2 years ago to prompt the change in your partner? Re your garden - shit must be piled on top of rotten shit - A-SHIT-TIP! - poor dogs have gone lame through lack of exercise or hopping on one leg through their own shite...

So you are going to your mothers - what about the child?

Why didn't you stick to your guns in the first place and say no to having the dogs at all? You said you're not a dog person so why have dogs? I think animals are a family thing. Me and my dh love dogs and he would go and buy one tomorrow however, I have said no for now as our girls are 6 and 1 so I'm busy with them through the day and he works away Monday to Friday so 90% of walking and cleaning up are down to me and I feel I have enough in right now.

Where the mess is concerned whether you like it or not you are going to have to do something if she won't. Get the dogs rehomed if she kicks up a stink tell her she can feel free to follow them - I would. Then start the clean up.

I'm sorry but I'd choose picking up a garden full of dog shit over losing my home and my child's home any day

Sorry- but I wouldn't be cleaning up someone else's dogs'shit. Boak, boak, boak. Nothing to do with growing a pair.

Well done for reporting to RSPCA

Oh what a lot of old bollocks this is.

Don't leave your son with this appalling waste of space and those miserable neglected dogs! If she can't look after animals I don't fancy the child's chances without you there as well.

Actually, is he yours? You say you've been together 9 years and he's 10. If he's not yours you probably can't just take him.

You have a ten year old child with her, except you’ve only been in a relationship for 9 years. I find that interesting.

You don’t like dogs yet agreed to have them as part of your family provided your partner care for them, but partner does nothing but sit about watching tv. Except that the housework gets done, the child is looked after and the shopping is done too. None of it seemingly by you. Find this interesting too.

You’re also apparently waiting for your mum to come pick you up. If you’ve been in a relationship for at least 9 years I’m going to assume you’re mid to late 20’s at the very youngest, bit old to be relying on mummy for a taxi service is it not?