Ex husband is dating a 16 year old, is it legal?

[SLA1978]

He is 43. I feel a bit sick about the whole thing... Is it legal? He is very open about it, so I assume it is.

Our children are supposed to be at his Friday-Monday, but she is frequently there at the weekends. I really don't feel comfortable about them being there.

I feel like I need to 'help' this girl... I don't think he would hurt her or anything, but I think it's fucking odd. She is still at school (only just gone into the sixth form though).

I don't really know what to do :(

I remember a girl in my class at school being in a relationship with a friend of her Mothers when she was sixteen. The girl was stunningly beautiful and thought she was so sophisticated to be wined and dined by the man her Mother thought was babysitting her. Her Mother would go on holiday with her new man and my friend would be bright eyed and delighted telling me about her wonderful boyfriend. Her Dad got custody and suddenly she was only able to have contact with her boyfriend during her time with her Mum (she had a very protective Father who would have hit the roof if he knew what went on!). As it was short visits with her Mum the relationship fizzled out and she started dating one of the boys in the year above. They are married now.

I remember wondering what on earth she saw in her 'boyfriend' (I thought 40 was ancient at sixteen and couldn't understand her interest in this old man). She had shown me a photo of him in an expensive suit and her in a very expensive evening dress that I would never expect to see on a sixteen year old. He was very handsome and looked like the cat that had caught the cream and knew it! It creeped me out even then, especially as the Mum and her boyfriend had been friends for years with the Mum regularly using her 'friend' for childcare from when this girl was tiny. It didn't surprise me when she said they had started their relationship just as she turned fourteen. I think she was blinded by lust and all the expensive gifts that he gave her. I feel sick now thinking about it.

I hope as an adult she has thrown the book at him!

If I remember right he had children too. This will fizzle out, unfortunately your ex has shown a taste for young girls that will likely continue now that he is 'single'. I wouldn't be too sure that the girl is sixteen though, especially as young girls have a tendency to lie about their age. I also would be shocked at her sitting exams at this time of year, more like she has bunked off school to spend time with him....

It's legal, but will be frowned upon. Also I can see why it feels strange. When they are out together people will think he is her dad. I knew a young girl, 18 who was dating a man old enough to be her dad, he was late 40's/early 50's. He looked like a perv, because he was dating someone so young. Although it's legal it comes across as a bit pervy. Must be hard for you to take In seeing him with someone so young.