The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Go Sober For October?

[Mouseface]

Hello, 'tis me, Mouseface, welcome to the Bus, aka Gerarld.

We're a bus full of various Babes, from those who are as dry the Sahara, those who drink in moderation, those who binge drink and can go for weeks without a drop and then fall arse over tit (pardon the french!) straight off the bus and into the sidecar, and then we have Babes who try every single day to give up.

The thing is, we all do 'this' ONE DAY AT A TIME and with passion too. You have to WANT to stop with every fibre of your being.

And that's what this bus is about. We support each other. No matter how many times you fall of the Bus, we'll always be here to scoop you back up and listen.

So, come and join us. Lurk, or grab a seat, make sure you're comfy and enjoy the journey as we talk about the dreaded drink, plus everything from how expensive Tena Lady's are, to what's in the slow cooker!

We don't judge, this isn't a competition, it's our lives.

And if you'd like to read the last thread, HERE IT IS

Plus, if you'd like to see where the Bus started out, you can RIGHT HERE

Hope to see you soon xx

Baked that’s brilliant x

Annabel I know exactly how you feel. I feel like I am trapped in the ultimate vicious circle. My ‘D’H sent me to my parents because of my drinking which I totally understand and think was fair enough. However, because I miss the DC so desperately, I’m drinking really heavily to blot that out because that’s the only coping mechanism I know.
But DH won’t let me come home if I’m drinking this heavily. I really want to get this detox started.
What worries in the longer term is that DH will try to sabotage everything. I do think he genuinely hates my drinking. However, the one decent period of sobriety I’ve managed outside of pregnancy, it reached a point where he was practically begging me to have ‘just one’ because I think he felt completely thrown by the fact that I was sober and he was drinking every day and could no longer do the victim thing about his alcoholic wife.
If I get to rehab, this is something that we will have to sort out before I come home.

Oh gosh Ms* sounds like you have a DH "problem " in addition to alcohol.
I havent mentioned this but DH and I came very close to divorce the first time I stopped .
I realised I had squashed down my true feelings towards him by drinking -it was a tough few months but that dynamic has now changed.
Xx

I can completely relate to that MsHoolie and Pink - stopping/trying to stop drinking really messes with the dynamic in my relationship too. I've posted on here about it before. DH is a drinker too -and our relationship was built on drinking together. The thing is, I think we both want to stop, but he finds it harder, and I do find that he gets on my nerves more when I'm sober. I don't think it helps that I'm perimenopausal. Anyway I had a major setback last night - six bottles of beer and a whole bottle of red . Felt like shit this morning.... but can already feel my resolve not to drink today wavering...

mshoolie and flowers, I have the same problem with my 'd'h, I was af Monday to Thursday this week, he was offering me a drink every time he got one (so very frequently) and was huffy when I said no thanks.
Last night I had 2 glasses of wine, his relief was palpable. Today he made me a G&T at 1pm, unasked for. I tipped it down the sink when he went out of the room and topped the glass up with tonic.
It makes me wonder how our marriage can continue when he tries to sabotage my health. Bastard.

Sorry, and pink too

Thanks guys. It’s good to know that I’m not the only one in this situation. If I do get my rehab, this is something that will absolutely have to be dealt with before I come home because there is no way I am going to maintain long term sobriety otherwise. And the reality is that it may mean us separating as I’m pretty sure DH has absolutely no desire to stop or even significantly cut down his alcohol use.

Hi all. MrsHoolie..I'm so sorry for the shit you're going through and I truly hope you come put the other side with a lovely life
I was going to be af today but my dd is refusing to speak to me and I'm worried she'll never forgive me. I also have a young ds...I'm terrified she's going to tell someone I've started drinking again and he'll get taken away from me.
I'm now blocking those thoughts out with alcohol and know I'm being so horribly selfish and stupid. I'd gone five months totally af and now have had two weeks on and off drinking in the evenings.
Tomorrow I'm starting again. I'm not risking losing my children because of alcohol.
I've been reading everyone's posts over the past few days and will continue to do so as it helps.

Annabel a lot of my job involves child protection. The fact that you have had 5 months af is brilliant. It’s extremely unlikely that your children will be removed because you recognise that you have a problem and you are trying to put it right.
Unfortunately, there are millions of children living in homes where their parents have drug or alcohol problems.
In the vast majority of cases, it is seen as more traumatic for the child to remove them than to remain with their parents when there is no obvious physical risk to them.
The fact that you recognise that you have a problem will be seen as a huge plus. I wish you all the best. Addiction sucks, it really does

Morning babes, just checking in & wishing strength to all. I'm still just plodding on, I sometimes drink and regret it so get back to being af. I'm just so bloody tired all the time and this really affects my sobriety- it's not a big problem and being aware of it helps.
Not complaining either, there are lots of people in much more difficult situations then me but I notice that I'm grumpy with the kids far more then I should be. No real answer to this, my children are small, non sleeping and Ds has additional needs, pity I'm not rich then I could have a nanny / cleaner / cook / sexy gardener, now that WOULD cheer me up!

Right have been up since 5, I need to stop whinging since it doesn't help. I have some cold apple juice in the fridge for tonight and some nice cheese (where are you mouse? ) so no need for skanky wine or filthy hangovers. Love to all and today I will not be drinking.

Slingsanderrors
I hear you. My DP is also an enabler. He wants me to drink to justify his own behaviour.
guggenheim
I've been awake since 5.30 aswell. The clocks changing always mess with my body clock. The only thing I'm convinced of is that it's Sunday.

mshoolies (and others) it's awful when you don't think you have the support that you need, and yet it's important not to try and solve everything at once. Start with the most important - YOU - not drinking, looking after yourself, getting whatever help you can grab. Then, you can make more logical and thought through decisions later on.

Looking at the whole messy picture would throw me into a panic, solved only by an all too familiar answer.... one thing at a time, one day at a time.

Just to give you hope. Today is Richard's birthday. Those who have been on the thread a while will remember my battle to save his life because of alcoholism. For new Babes, my well educated and intelligent brother was,quite lierally,in the gutter. He lost everything. His body was covered in sores. He stank. He had the shakes. He hadnt eaten in days. He could barely walk. He ended up in a Salvation Army Lifehouse where he lived fr two years. Fast forward and he is now living and working in China teaching English. He is well and happy. Hope this doesnt out him but I wanted to show it can be done.

Happy Birthday Richard. A true inspiration x

Dementedma...that's such a story of hope and inspiration. I'll remember that whenever I feel hopeless and stuck. Well I've been to the local shop and have returned with just fruit and salad.. No wine! Today is my start again day after these stupid two weeks of drinking most evenings and awful hangovers the next day. Dd spent last night at her friends so I'm hoping when she comes back she'll be ready to talk to me again. But if she doesn't I'm not using it as a reason to drink tonight.

Morning lovelies,

well, for all my fine talk over the last few months - I got very drunk on Champagne last night and feel like utter shit today
It was a long evening with great food and I woke in the night feeling sick, a feeling I have not had in a long, long time now.
Lesson learned then, wine of any type is not for me. I thought after all these months I'd be able to sip champagne sensibly and be all grown up about it, but no I was tipping it back and today I'm I feel like my insides are being eaten by acid.

I need to up my game, I've become complacent and the odd beer is becoming a more regular thing. Stupid me.

Happy birthday to the handsome and inspirational Richard, I'm so glad he's doing well, it's clearly been a long road to walk, how wonderful

Hope everyone is doing OK today, I need a bath and a bacon sandwich and lots and lots of coffee. Thought these days were behind me. They are from today but already I'm thinking a drink with dinner later will sort me out, silly thinking but hey.

Have a good day all.

Thanks mint
ma what an inspirational story. I read about Richard while lurking here, so glad he's well and happy.

demented I think I may have something in my eye. How did he manage to get sober?

ma
Your brother is an inspiration! He's quite cute too

So last night I had two sips of Procecco and then chucked it down the sink. It seems this viral thing I had had absolutely killed any craving for alcohol! In fact just thinking about it makes me queasy. This happened 12 years ago with larger. I've never been able to drink it since.

He is rather cute Mint isn't he? I'm single now, so...

Your virus sounds awful mint but has had it's positives with putting you off booze I guess.

I managed a fry and a shower and still feel shit. I've let myself down, bugger.

He's single ladies....shall I put a word in?

It was a long road mrshoolie. The Salvation Army did the hard work, got him detoxed and back on his feet. After living in the main building he moved into supported accommodation and began working in the local community. He built a community garden, did a lot of loca@ history and worked at a mental health project. Then he got his own council flat bit it was very very rural and he had far too much time on his hands....there was a slip up and he realised that he was in danger of heading right back to the streets. He took a holiday in Greece and fell instantly in love with the place. Did a course in teaching in English but there was no work in Greece and he got an offer from China. It was abig big decision. So far away if things went wrong again, but he has lived and worked in China before so was familiar with the culture and language. So he went. So far,so good. Loving it, keeping well and sober and happy. I have just spoken to him on wechat. Thank you all for your ki d regards and for all the help I have had. Richard travels on the bus in spirit. There IS another life to be had on the other side....there is!

ma
He's bloody amazing. He's my new crush next to Cillian Murphy.
Tell him Happy Birthday from me.
LuxuryWoman2017
Oh now, a fairy tale ending here would be nice. 😄

Loving the Richard love on here....lux shall I matchmake?

Please ma is he tall? 😀

Lux and Richard - it's got a ring to it!