DRY 18

[vxa2]

Link to old thread www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2841743-DRY-17

@nowstrong well done and hope the week goes well

How's everyone doing? I'm happy that I don't seem to think about alcohol during the week now. So even if I drink too much when I do drink (though my next goal is to moderate that!) I've slashed what I drink.

I'm continuing to lose weight even after my week of gorging myself. Makes sense as I'm no longer having all the calories I was drinking and all the munchies that went with it. My friend is doing dry October and I can't believe the change in her face after just 2 weeks. Her skin and eyes look amazing. It's incredible how aging and dehydrating alcohol is.

Hi Musti and Sowhatifidosnore!
I've been thinking a lot about the whys and whens of my drinking, also about my social habits. In all honesty I think that I'm the heaviest drinker in my social group of friends. This HAS to change. I am slowly getting there. To less and then to none. At least I've kicked my daily habit (when I got home in the evening my first gesture was to reach for the vino) so that really is something to celebrate (with a hot chocolate perhaps).
The next problem will solely be my will power when in a group (family) who might cheer me on to have "just" the one… not sure that I'll be able to manage that. So I clearly have to get my mindset in order.
It's strange how I can now be with friends and not drink, or just have one glass but with my closest family member, other than my children, with whom I feel morally responsible not to over drink, I'm worried.
Will churn this over and over in my mind and see what I come out with. I will definitively keep you informed of my progress or fall. Then I will either pick myself up and continue, lesson learnt, or have another hot chocolate to celebrate.
As to physical aspect, being properly hydrated really does make a difference. Especially when you are no longer a spring chicken, like myself. The under eye bags are really getting better.
Hugs to all.
x

Gosh this thread had slipped back a few pages.

How is everyone?

I must confess to really fancying a drink tonight. I could (in theory) have a small bottle or even 2 of my beloved red wine with the medication I take and I know I wouldn't go beyond that.

But I've been dry for 7 weeks on Sunday I've been feeling good and I've lost a stone.

I never intended to be completley teetotal, just want it to be the exception and not the normality?

I'm just worried that if I do have my 2 small bottles and I do lose weight next week and my blood tests are all fine, will I then fancy the same again next week? Will it creep up to 3 small bottles?

I'm on a medication that is strictly 6 units of alcohol a week and none on the days I take it.....

But I genuinely fancy a glass and know it won't become a bottle!!

Decisions, decisions.

Hi @crunchymum well done! I'm managing to just drink at weekends when out no problem so far. I don't even think about it in the week. Had just over a bottle last night and was a bit hungover today. Didn't fancy drinking on Friday even though I was out with friends who were drinking as I wanted to be fresh for Saturday.

Hello, sorry to have been so absent, but I notice that we haven't really moved a lot lately. Short update. Not really too happy about being completely dry as I have had a few slips (or slurps). So my promise to be dry until Christmas is a bit wonky, but I'm still trying. However, one big thing for me is that I have really kicked the drinking alone habit. I now always have a cup of tea, or whatever, when I get home after work and no longer reach for anything stronger. That really is a very positive thing for me, as I then tended to have another one, or two, as you do...
The other thing that I have noticed is that I now also drink a lot of water when out socially. So I have really cut down from sometimes one bottle of wine (plus) on my own on a regular basis, to just one glass, sometimes, depending on the week and my social agenda.
I'm sleeping SO much better, feel less bloated and I'm not even worried about the coming weekend, which will be entirely alcohol free as I will be at home relaxing and not socializing. I might have a friend drop in, but even they are getting used to being served tea.
So. I've haven't yet managed to become teetotal, but I'm getting there. More importantly, I'm in control. It's just nice to be able to write it down. It makes it more real. I am wondering if I should write a "dry" diary.
Keep up the good work everyone and I hope that you are all well.
x

Day 1 (2.5 years sober, then I fell off the wagon around March this year)

Hi

I’d like to join the thread please. My drinking has spiralled out of control. Drinking to blackout stage, waking up and continuing the next day. This used to be an every now and then thing but it’s now happening once or more a week.

I’m worried that I’ve caused serious damage to myself. I was going to wait until January to start but after having to miss my nephews birthday party today due to a horrendous hangover I know I need to start now.

X

Will you be starting a DRY19? Would love to join x

i have inly not drank for 24 hours.. but i need too change im sick of feeling embarrassed ashamed too luck at my phone.. my partner is at the end of his teather with me.. plus ive just fpund out im expecting baby number 1! so i need too change my habits.. i dont get withdrawals so im lucky there.. but i cant remember the last time i had a full night sleep.. so im glad i have come aceoss this thread! c

Back here now. I am starting to drink daily again so downloaded the app and going alcohol free during the week again. How's everyone doing?

Day 1 was fine. Had a few twinge around dinner time but was ok. Did my workout just before dinner so that helped. once I've eaten I don't really feel like drinking so I'm scheduling dinner early this week to see how it goes.

Have been lurking and want to join the thread. Have namechanged. In my 40s and have been drinking since my teenage years. Gradually has built up to me normalising it so much that I am drinking a bottle of wine most nights plus more if I am working, staying in a hotel, on a plane etc. Tried dry January and did ok but broke it for a night out and then kept breaking it in the second half. Manage to hide it from the real world - my friends and family know I drink a lot - but not that I drink so much alone. Have often passed out on the sofa and woken at 2am and gone to bed. Often fall asleep before end of films etc. Have hidden bottles in the past. Has just become such a normalised part of life. But I am fed up now. Need to recognise it is not healthy and stop. Have always tried to cut down and moderate but this is no longer enough. Am on day 2

Well done @heyelp I know how hard the two days after drinking all the time is. I was similar last year plus experiencing blackouts as when I went out I drunk so much more since I could easily drink 1-2 bottles a night as standard.

I did dry Sept last year and then only drank when I went out. I stopped thinking about alcohol at home and lost loads of weight and looked years younger. Then the Christmas parties and celebrations started and I started to drink too often again and again, starting to miss it of I didn't have it daily. When I drank I would finish the bottle etc.

I am actually really honest with my friends as find they support but don't judge. I found this thread really useful and also downloading an app where I had to put in whether I had a drink or not. It sounds silly but it really helps.

I felt so free for those 3ish months of not thinking about having a drink every night and I had so much more time to do the things I enjoyed.

Good luck and keep posting here every day, good or bad as I find it really helps.

Thanks @Musti. Thanks for replying. I agree it helps to do it with others. I do have the drink aware app and tried using it before but I didn’t have the feeling of urgency or resolve so it never worked. I think the thing that has helped here is that I have always thought people with an alcohol problem were those that were lying in the street drinking all hours of the day. I have started to realise that this is not true! But that is what society tells us is a problem drinker. Now I have realised that one bottle a day is simply not normal and you can have an alcohol problem even if you wait to start until the evenings. Also I have a high stress full time job with 2 kids and an ex DH - so am looking after them alone. I guess it is how I coped. And I was coping with the job - no days off, could handle the hangovers, no illness etc - so again kidded myself that everything was ok. It’s not!!!!! It’s scary now I read this and realise my drinking was out of control.

Didn’t sleep well last night. Getting sweats and waking up in the night a lot. I just hope that will pass with time. Darent go and have a liver check. One day at a time.

Thanks all for the support x

@heyelp yes. I am a professional mother of 4, have a pretty busy and normal life and not what anybody would think is an alcoholic. But drinking that much every night is a problem. I know why I did it, to help make dinner times with 4 little kids easier and to anaesthetise my relationship abuse problems. But it's become a very unhealthy habit and one that i have to change. My friends knowledge and encouragement help a lot.

What I found really helped was to avoid situations that usually meant drinking and doing more fun stuff that required me driving or being sober as I usually did the opposite!

Anyway, I look forward to getting back on track - so bring on a great and healthy and fun 2019!

Fully agree @Musti. Mine was indeed to wind down from the stress of the day and to then start up again with a full time mum job at home. You are lucky that you have understanding friends. Alcohol has become so much part of my persona now that I don’t think my friends would take me seriously if I told them. The first step is finally realising you have a problem. I think that has finally dawned on me. I really did think all was fine because was functioning. Now just to follow through on that realisation. I have been reading lots from people on here saying things like - you do a few days AF and then think - oh - I didn’t really have a problem and can drink moderately again. I am just confident now that I can’t. I have never been a moderate drinker. Once I start a bottle I finish the damn thing. And if there is a bit left I would finish it in the morning. I simply can’t have an open bottle of wine winking at me from the fridge. It needs finishing. And if I go on a plane short haul I drink wine because it is feee. And not just one small bottle. And if I do an overnight flight I pass out with wine - my excuse being that it puts me to sleep so is good. I rarely eat sweet things - I realise now it is because of the alcohol! Even when pregnant I would have the odd glass of red wine. Nothing excessive but still the odd glass here and there with dinner. I simply must now kick the habit and go cold turkey. I haven’t told my new DP (we don’t live together) because my pride won’t let me. He knows I drink a lot - but I hide the amount I drink alone from him (we are not together in the week). I think he will be shocked if I go completely dry but I think I really need to now.

Yes , When I did dry Sept I thought if I couldn't keep to social drinking (1-2x a week then I'll go completely dry). And completely dry is probably easier as it won't continually restart the cycle. However, I managed quite easily until Christmas so if I go back to only drinking when I'm out, that's fine, as most nights I'm at home. If you travel with work and entertain or have to eat out with work then it's harder but easier if you cut it out altogether.

Found last night a lot easier. Didn't even think about it. Slept brilliantly too. I'm looking forward to losing some lbs!

Me too @Musti! Day 3. Feeling brilliant in the sunshine. Made myself a seedlip and tonic in a lovely glass with ice and fresh mint!!! Bought loads of lovely non alcoholic drinks and that makes it feel as if I am treating myself to something. Am worrying about the weekend as will see my DP. Will just tell him am not drinking. I also need to lose a few lbs round the middle. Looking forward to that bit too....

I can’t say I am not thinking about it though. Am aware all the time. Still felt a bit sweaty overnight and woke a couple of times but hoping that will calm down soon

@heyelp brilliant! Could you do an activity with him that isn't usually related to drinking but is fun? I would just tell him that you drink too much so have to cut it out. That's what I've told the guy I'm seeing and he's very supportive.

Yep. He will be fine with it. I really am resolute now. I think reading this thread a switch just clicked. That a bottle of wine a night (plus more when away with work) is just too much. Stupid that I didn’t realise it sooner. There must be a lot of functioning people with alcohol problems around.

Uffff can’t believe it’s only day 3. It’s pathetic.

It's not pathetic. The first few days are the hardest. Another day here and I don't even feel like it. Think I have a bit of hayfever so my head feels fuzzy so that may be why, but I'm taking it!