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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

social services took my beautiful children

473 replies

user1491683745 · 08/04/2017 21:41

it really is not fair to do it to someone who absolutely loves and adores them they really need me and are probably so unhappy i am so done with life and really really want them with me

OP posts:
Floggingmolly · 08/04/2017 22:38

Seriously, op, your child has apparently reached out for help and you're wondering why he has "done this to you"?

SpiritedLondon · 08/04/2017 22:38

Well if the police have been and removed the children they may well have used their powers of police protection which is an emergency power rather than a court order. It only lasts 72 hours which gives the local authority an opportunity to go to court to seek an order ( if the " significant harm" hasn't been addressed) This is usually done " with notice" which means you will be told about the court date and will have a chance to be represented there. The main issue is that your child has been making repeated disclosures.....I'm concerned that you don't seem to be bothered about that. Do they relate to you or your partner? Have you decided that they are not true because I can assure you that loving a child does not automatically ensure they are protected.

LovingLola · 08/04/2017 22:39

Has he been in trouble at home or school and you or your partner have disciplined him? If that is the case do you think he has tried to get back at you by calling Childline? What ages are your other children?

Floggingmolly · 08/04/2017 22:40

Were the allegations against you or your partner, op?

AnnieAnoniMouse · 08/04/2017 22:41

I think (or hope at least) she means 'they', not he. As in why are SS doing this. Not her DS. (She probably has an annoying phone that thinks it knows better!)

MichaelSheensNextDW · 08/04/2017 22:41

Your defensiveness and focus on how you upset you and your partner doesn't put you a good light, sorry.
You haven't expressed any concern about how shocking and confusing it must have been for your children to suddenly be removed by strangers to go to an unfamiliar place.
You haven't expressed any concern about why your son was 'using childline' over a period of weeks; he could have been harmed in some way by your partner or a friend who comes round.

NancyWake · 08/04/2017 22:43

Sounds like it was an EPO. Something in your home environment is an immediate danger to your children. Is it your partner? Is he mentally or physically abusive? Do either of you have addiction issues?

user1489677782 · 08/04/2017 22:43

AnnieAnonimouse - Totally agree that SS can get things so very wrong. Another issue is that no matter what the outcome is they can not accept that they got it wrong and apologise. That is so wrong and ill mannered.
OP says that the children were taken from their last location. This could have been school or a relative's house. They don't seem to have been taken from her house. That is a bit brutal and did not give OP the chance to say something about the SS issues. That may have saved the distress on the children and OP

ShamefulDodger · 08/04/2017 22:43

I feel very sorry for your dc and you op.

But this doesn't happen for no reason, ss and the police must have had serious concerns.

Can't really form any opinion on this without knowing what your ds was seeking help with.

TinselTwins · 08/04/2017 22:43

Can you arrange for your partner to stay somewhere else incase that would mean your children can come home?

LorLorr2 · 08/04/2017 22:44

That must be heartbreaking for you. For your son to have contacted Childline about something that made them feel the need to take him, he must have made quite a strong claim. Do you have any inkling what it might have been about?
If you've done nothing wrong then you have nothing to worry about. Did they tell you any more info or was that it?

Floggingmolly · 08/04/2017 22:45

I don't think you should attempt to rewrite op's posts under the assumption that some if it was auto corrected, Annie. Why would you do that?!
Quite presumptuous of you.

pennypickle · 08/04/2017 22:45

I can only reiterate pp's posts - Children are not removed from a loving family for no reason....

Original poster
user1491683745 · 08/04/2017 22:46

i am not mad at my son at all i am upset for him he needs me and i want to be there for him i just want to speak to him my poor babies they are only 3 and 7 but why did they then go too it makes no sense none of this and this horrible pain that i have is not helping because i do not even want to live if my life will be without them

OP posts:
Solo · 08/04/2017 22:46

I'm sure the OP is in shock right now and not thinking straight. This could be any one of us and we don't know how we would react, think or feel. My own Ds used to threaten me with calling CL if he couldn't get his way or we had a disagreement.

NancyWake · 08/04/2017 22:48

go to court to seek an order ( if the " significant harm" hasn't been addressed) This is usually done " with notice" which means you will be told about the court date and will have a chance to be represented there

Yy. The 'court decision' the OP refers to means she will have been informed of the issues, and offered the option of representation.

Darbs76 · 08/04/2017 22:48

Stay strong your children need you. You will get a chance to discuss all this and hopefully get the children back if you can resolve what the issue is. Hang in there

CrochetBelle · 08/04/2017 22:48

Did this just happen OP?

MiscellaneousAssortment · 08/04/2017 22:49

Do you know why they think your son is in danger at home?

It has to be something really big for them to act like this.

If it's not you, then you need to be able to protect him from the danger, whoever and whatever that danger is. And so as soon as you do find out what's going on, you need to show you can get your child away from the danger and/or abuse, and keep them safe. Don't dismiss the reasons you are given, do whatever you need to to put your children first.

And get proper legal advice. Whatever you do don't rely on the lies and myths and stories that others may tell you. Those kind of stories encourage people to stop engaging with social services which is the worst thing you could do.

Is it just your son, or other children you have?

If it came down to it, what would you do to get him/them back?

NancyWake · 08/04/2017 22:50

OP I think you need to start being honest with yourself about the reasons they have been removed. If you do that you can start to address pathways to potentially get them back in the future.

If you can't be honest, you really have no chance.

LovingLola · 08/04/2017 22:50

The OP's 3 year old and 7 year old have been removed as well.

Original poster
user1491683745 · 08/04/2017 22:50

i have absolutely not been told anything about representation i have actually been told very little about what my son has said

OP posts:
ShamefulDodger · 08/04/2017 22:50

I was a troublesome teenager and called childlike twice on my parents (looking back for not very clear reasons, just usual teenage angst)

I, and my siblings, were never removed from the family home.

As I said, ss and the police don't act this way for no reason.

Original poster
user1491683745 · 08/04/2017 22:51

honest are you fucking joking i am being fucking honest i have no bloody clue stop attacking me like i am some kind of child abuser i would never hurt my children i would never fucking do anything like that

OP posts:
Papafran · 08/04/2017 22:51

When precisely did this happen? I am extremely surprised at the version of events that you have described based on a call to childline. In any case, you need to find a specialist child care solicitor, who can explain the process from here. It certainly is not the end of the matter because they simply cannot permanently remove children without a court order (and unless this is police emergency protection), they would need a court order for shorter removals also.

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