social services took my beautiful children

[user1491683745]

it really is not fair to do it to someone who absolutely loves and adores them they really need me and are probably so unhappy i am so done with life and really really want them with me

Why is it odd that the OP hasn't known an 11 year old has been phoning Childline? It isn't an abuse hotline. It's a talking service for young people. Children talk about anything, from feeling lonely and just wanting to talk about their favourite TV show, to very serious stuff like sexual abuse.

I've worked for the NSPCC, so very closely with Childline and I can only duplicate what Debs has said really. Childline would not break confidentiality unless his life was at immediate risk or the young person has specifically asked us to tell someone.

It doesn't have to have been the police, the NSPCC can quite easily obtain an emergency protection order and as Childline doesn't break confidentiality unless we believe their life to be at immediate risk (and this isn't taken lightly at all, many questions would have been asked over the phone) it's not particularly hard in the right circumstances. However, this does change for when younger children are involved (which there are), which is an even longer explanation about how the confidentiality works.

OP, I don't mean for this to sound rude, but you must be included somewhere, so your son would have made it clear that he wasn't safe with you either.

There is simply not enough information here for any of us to come to a sensible conclusion about whether SS have acted appropriately or not, OP, and since we're never likely (and quite rightly too) to get access to all the relevant complaints, paperwork, and whatnot, it's going to be very difficult for people to give you more than practical advice of where to turn, and emotional support to get through a difficult time.

Whatever the case, I hope that the situation resolves itself itself in the best way for everyone concerned, whatever that resolution might be.

Sometimes children are taken by social services because the parents aren't able to guarantee the children's safety! This can be for many reasons from partners of parents with existing behaviours that put the children at risk. Dangerous drug and alcohol use or exposure to this. Neglecting to feed, dress and appropriately dress ALL children. Physical abuse, exposure to domestic violence or promiscuous behaviours. Being left alone or in the care of another young person not old enough to take responsibility.

You will have been told the category under which your children were removed. An Emergency protection order and police approval is required for immediate removal and this is done in extreme circumstances!

Please know if your children have been put in care it is for their immediate safety. This doesn't necessarily mean it was you that was the risk factor! It could be your partner however it was felt that you were not able to keep them safe from harm.

You will find out more this week! If there is no risk at all your children will be returned!

Well said Devil. None of us know what's happened really, so let's hold back with the judgmental posts.

Why is it odd that the OP hasn't known an 11 year old has been phoning Childline?

OP did know this - she said upthread that her DS called them after some bullying issues and when his grandad died

Devils you are being ridiculously melodramatic.
You won't be helping the op at all with that sort of post.

OP if you are still reading.
Contact www.frg.org.uk on Monday for advice. They will give you unbiased and good quality information regarding procedures and your rights/children's rights
Get a legal advice ASAP. Someone on the Children Panel.
You MUST have a solicitor.

Be prepared that SS only apply for these emergency removals in the most severe cases. As they didn't find your children alone (one reason they will remove them) you DS has told them something that has led them to believe they are at immediate risk in the home/from you/your partner.

I could not judge if that is true, no one on this thread can.
But it is the only way an order would be granted and as they are not telling you anything it is likely they think you are one of the risk factors.

That is horrible and traumatic.
I cannot understand why anyone would downplay that with 'if its ok the kids will be returned'. As if that will make it all ok

Get some proper advice and please listen to what FRG tell you.

You can get your children back from this. How can we say that.. we do t have any idea of the circumstances. Social care do not take children off their families without a very good reason. And sadly some children are not able to go back home. We should not give false hope without knowing the circumstances.

OP many have commented already and given lots of helpful insights about how the system works generally. For your situation none of us have enough insight to be able to speculate further. I hope this is resolved quickly and your little ones are back with you soon. You haven't given much detail OP and that is fair enough. The thing that stands out to me is lack of info regarding firstly your partner ie where are they, what is their stance? Secondly the children's father. It isn't clear if they are one and the same person. I do wonder if someone outside the family home has been arrested and you are not aware?

*The suggestions of someone impersonating the ds or the ds making up an allegation for attention don't really stand up to scrutiny.

If the average eleven year old made a false allegation they'd be likely to retract it fairly quickly because going into emergency foster care with strangers would be far more terrifying than admitting to people that they'd got carried away looking for attention.*

How could he retract if someone else had made the disxclosure? he wouldn't know what he is retracting! And do you really think that many children being removed, skip happily off or do you think they plead, retract and beg and cling to their adults?

OP - here's a link to a really useful website called Child Protection Resource. It was set up by a MNer who realised that there was a need for clear and unbiased information about what happens when families need support or intervention

Actually Spring, many many children in various situations (I am not saying this is the case here) do go off with peace and hope with other adults they know to be safe - IE patently obviously 'safe', as in the Police in uniform who collected the children from X location and then to the emergency foster home that SS have placed them with.

The only thing vis the above is that, by definition, given the privacy of the children and the nature of proceedings, we don't often hear about it. One (rare) example where we do know of it would be Shannon Matthews who made it very very clear that she did not want to go home with her Mother.

It's awful and I suspect most of us would prefer to think it doesn't happen as just how horrific must a child's life experiences be that that is the choice they articulate?

But just because most of us would prefer it would never ever happen that a child would feel safer out of his/her home than within it, just because most of us have no experience of it and only the 'normal' maternal experience of knowing our children would be distraught and panicked to be forced away from us, does not mean it doesn't happen (again, I will reiterate I am not referring directly to OP here, more the broader issues & feelings that something like this raises for a lot of us).

My understanding of foster carers (although I'm happy to be corrected) is that the kind who are able to respond to emergency removal cases and very sudden emergency placement are the most experienced, both per se have much experience and also have experience of dealing with disorientated and still reeling youngsters in that very sudden kind of placement.

My primary concern vis this specific matter is that the children concerned are okay and are hopefully right now out playing in a park somewhere with some very skilled, and very caring, foster parents

Why was your child using Childline, OP?

distance the op has said why at least twice.

She has said why he used it in previous years but not this time. A primary school child doesn't usually have a phone or isn't left unsupervised so how could the OP not notice the calls for a week or that something was wrong?

he used it a lot when he was bullied last year and when his grandad died i dont have an issue with that and i think its a good service for him especially as he is very shy but this is a whole new step

That was last year. And in any case, if a child is being bullied and upset by his grandfather's death, it is his parents' responsibility to deal with that.

He could quite easily be a year 7 with a mobile phone. I let my 11 year old go out on bus bike and take his phone with him.

Distance, what is that supposed to mean? I my eldest has used Childline for continuous support after things have been dealt with. It's actually something I was suggested to tell her about. It gives them someone anonymous to talk to.

I really cannot fathom giving a 7-year-old his own mobile phone. But even so, shouldn't the parents check what calls he is making on a regular basis?

Also, on the Childline website:

There may be times when we're very worried about your or someone else's safety and we need to tell someone about what's happening. If this is the case, we might use your phone number or IP address (a number used by your internet provider) to get help to you.

If we don’t have those, we work with the police and phone company to get your phone number or IP address. We'd always try and talk to you first, before we pass this information on.

He is 11.

NCing, from what you say, you were aware of your child's issues and got help for them. And then your child used Childline as further support. (Although, to be honest, I tend to think that it's best to find face-to-face support from a counsellor or psychologist. But I do understand that it's not always possible to get that).

The OP's children have been removed because someone on Childline thought they were endangered because of something the child said. The OP claims to have no idea about what the issue might be. The situation is completely different.

And I know your child is 11. The OP's child is 7. You were mentioning the possibility of his having a mobile phone, which, as I said, I find hard to imagine.

No the OP's oldest is 11. Then she has a 7 and 3 year old.

No I do agree with you as their confidentiality clearly says:

WHEN WE MIGHT NEED TO TELL SOMEONE
We'd only need to say or do something if:
you ask us to
we believe your life or someone else’s life is in danger
you're being hurt by someone in a position of trust who has access to other children like a teacher or police officer
you tell us that you're seriously harming another person.

And then says that they can keep more a secret than school, so it must have been very serious and to know nothing about it is strange.

The OP's child is 7

A bit confused. I think she said he was 11.

Ah, I misread that then. Apologies.

But yes, I think the child must have said something pretty serious to cause the children to be removed. Which is why it's very odd that his mother has absolutely no idea. I don't think they remove children on a whim or on a misinterpreted remark.