Hello all, lovely that you all remembered today was doc day. Have a prescription for Zopiclone - 14 tabs like last time. He said if I didn't find them effective we could try something else. Unborn* you poor thing - how did you manage that? It must have been so frightening.
Chasing I'm sure you would have heard something by now if there was a problem - hopefully a case of no news is good news.
daisy I'm sorry to hear about your db. And I note that was in February too :(. I still haven't been able to unpack Mark's hospital bag, it's just sitting on the bedroom floor.
Icant I'm so so sorry to hear about your friend's dh. Her situation sounds very similar to mine - we were married exactly a month shy of 24 years. Why not steer her towards MN for some support, either by starting her own thread or perhaps reading others from people who've been through similar. My first thread after Mark died was so comforting - knowing so many people had us in their thoughts really did help me, and I found it cathartic writing every night about what had happened that day. I still haven't been able to read my own posts back as it's too soon to relive it all but I'm very glad there's a record of it somewhere. And I have reread the posts from others, offering support, advice, love, comfort etc.
It will be 8 weeks on Monday since Mark died and I look back on those first 2/3 weeks and in all honesty remember very little. The friends who helped me most were those who were willing to be there if I wanted them but to not be offended if I didn't. And practical help was good too so people willing to drive me anywhere, to make tea for other visitors, to come with me to solicitors/undertakers/registrars etc, to sound out about funeral plans etc. It's helpful as well sometimes if people, rather than saying, let me know if I can help, say something more definitive. For eg, can I do your ironing, do you want me to go shopping for you etc. Sometimes just trying to think of what people can do is just too much - stupid as that sounds.
So many people want to help at a time like this but that in itself can be quite stressful. So perhaps your friend would appreciate you fielding calls and visitors for her until she feels up to facing people? Also, for me, some days on my own, in bed, spent sobbing, were important. I really didn't want to be made to feel guilty or bad for doing this because I knew it was a coping mechanism for me, and not a sign that I was going to become deeply depressed (although it's still early days - that might still happen!) And really, it's a case of taking not even one day at a time, but one hour or sometimes even one minute at a time. Someone said to me that you always think that you will always feel the way you are feeling right now. But of course you don't.
Please send her my thoughts and sympathies.