Brave Babes - reconvene here!!!

[dementedma]

Hi all
We seem to have finished the last thread but no-one has done a new one. Don't get lost! Gather here until we can sort it out.

joey I would get products for coloured hair to protect it once you've had the highlights. I saw an article from good housekeeping magazine about thickening hair, have a search.

AF tonight but have 'treated' myself to half a sleeping pill. Tucked up in clean sheets with tea waiting for the lovely sleepy feeling to hit. Can see how easy it would be to get addicted to them too (I won't- am v strict about no more than twice a week to reset and catch up). Night all xx

Night Elba well done for an AF day.
Going to hit the pillow myself. Night Babes.

Oh ma how crap for you.
I'd say it'll be okay will just take some time to heal. Bruises take a while.
Yes yes to drinking so as not to feel.
Insight is key.

Night night, Elba.

Ma, that looks sore, keep an eye on it if you don't want to bother the GP or minor injuries - I wouldn't go - like Lux, but that isn't a recommendation.

Joey if you are getting blonde highlights, use a purple, brightening shampoo, not a colour protect, it will stop them from turning brassy. I can't remember the name of the one I use, but I got it in Sainsburys - the colour is a bit scary though!

End of day three, down to one pack of cookies today , but still af.

Last night was tough. Yesterday I found out at work that a very dear friend had died suddenly after receiving her long awaited transplant.
That's it really.

Morning All, Stuck in the kitchen while the cat plays with a mouse - can't let the dog out of the living room before she has dealt with it. Bloody animals!

Day four, and I have that horrible metallic taste in my mouth, but I feel a bit more 'present'.

Elf, you haven't ruined your present - your present is about moving forward and gaining control, and you are rocking it.

Have a good day babes. hope its a good one, or a bearable , but at least an af one.

Morning all.
Drank last night. Sigh.
blamed it (in own head) on work (awful) but it is just a crap excuse.
Today I will not drink.
Have a good day

Lux, I was very struck by your description of alcohol addressed to Littlebat. It really resonated - why the fuck do we do it?

42 work is has been my excuse over the last week or so - but actually, it's the tiredness that work causes (H.A.L.T). But it just makes the tiredness worse. If you can kept the underlying cause in mind rather than just the big, 'WORK' perhaps it will be easier to avoid by planning positive steps to avoid or address the 'hungry' or the 'tired'?

As long as we keep on trying.

mint I'm so sorry
I hope you're with someone to support you today x

Really sorry about your friend mint

I took a couple of Nytol last night in desperation to try and get a few hours decent sleep. They knocked me out alright, but I woke up halfway through the night in a tizzy, not knowing where I was, muttering nonsense to OH, and this morning I feel like I drunk a bottle of wine last night (I didn't)

Still only got 5 hours ( which is good for me) but really crave a good 7 or 8.. Sigh

Thanks sweet, at the moment it's the awfulness (been acquired, being demoted, not keen on new boss, at risk of redundancy) but drinking helps with all that not one iota.
Thank you - I will keep trying.

I really should learn to refresh my screen more often.

Sorry for your loss Mint, it must be even more difficult when a transplant is a reason to hope for a new and better life.

Dave, I know it's not easy, but do you think you are obsessing about sleep and so preventing yourself from getting it? Before I developed a problem with alcohol ruining sleep, I struggled because I couldn't switch my brain off. I started sleeping with the radio on so that if I woke up I would concentrate on that and not on being awake. Sleep specialists I heard talking about the technique recommended the World Service (so R4 after midnight) because the words per minute is deliberately slower than other speech radio, so it is more soothing and less likely to be the cause of waking. What it also does is reiterate that you might sleep more than you think - because you might wake up frequently, but never hear the end of a programme! Of course if you share the bedroom you need comfortable headphones!

Oh mint I am sorry x

Morning all, will catch up with you properly later.

mint so sorry

Didn't get much sleep either, despite my half a tablet. Couldnt take a whole one as have therapy this morning which is a 10 mile drive, and they tend to make me drowsy. Was on nights at the weekend though so my first proper nights sleep is always crap. Like sweet my issue is my brain just doesn't shut the fuck up, and then I tend to get in a bit of a panic. I think part the issue is I've self medicated myself to sleep for such a long time.

I'm going out for dinner later and I'm going to drink. Spent January pretty much avoiding all social stuff then ending up drinking on my own anyway, and it's not likely to be a wild Tuesday night!

I have no work until Friday, and only 25 hours this week, and one day next week! It's all scattered bits of annual leave that I didn't get much say in, but actually really glad of it at the moment. Looks like application for reduced hours should be going ahead- 0.8 wte which will be 30-35 per week. Not ideal, financially or career wise, but I can top up with extra bits from time to time.

Anyway have a good day, sorry for rambling on!

Morning Elba
What work do you do? I've been trying to guess from your work patterns, but can't think of one single job with such a pattern :)
What does everyone else do, out of interest, and do you like it?
I am a scientist in a small biotech company, which is mostly great and definitely interesting, sometimes stressful.....

Grumpy quality assurance in a fairly creative field, but I'm 'between' jobs at the moment as my business has gone to shit and I'm going through major life changes, hoping by Easter things will be on a more even keel. I feel fairly optimistic, the constant worry and anxiety is in retreat and I believe that is due to staying of the booze.

Today will be AF , hope the non sleepers manage the day ok.
I hope you mint have some support around the loss of your friend, so sad.

Elba, make sure you have a plan for the downtime so that you can use it productively to look after yourself. I'm considering a 0.8 contract myself, the trouble is I know that the 0.2 will be really hard to protect, because it's the sort of job that follows you home.

Grumpy, sounds really interesting.

Not sure why today feels different - but it does. Today I do not want to be someone with a drink problem. I don't even want to be someone who drinks normally. Today I don't want to be someone who drinks, I'm finding the thought of alcohol really rather repulsive.

I know this is every bit as transient as the cravings, and the whisperings of the WW, but I needed to write it down. to remind myself.

Maybe it's your time Sweet perhaps you've had a LBM? (Lightbulb moment)

I am enjoying the freedom of not thinking about the evenings drinking when I wake up (really hope I can keep at it) also, stupidly, there is a certain freedom in not having to make sure there is tonic in the house, or using the self service machines at the supermarket and not have to call an assistant for help buying wine - tiny wins on top of the huge ones.

I think about alcohol constantly, not in a craving way, in a philosophical way, a little like once raw grief has passed the deceased remains in the back of your mind all the time.
I wonder if it will ever go, and does it even matter? I used to love playing tennis, I loved a boyfriend called David and my old house, those times have passed but they all remain in the back of my head, I don't need them back in my life, I don't need wine, I don't.

mint I'm sorry for your loss.

Mint so sorry for your loss, hope the day doesn't go too long for you. I think it's worse when there's been hope given with a transplant or op.

42 today's a new day. I find if I drink one night I'm not meant to I get more will power not to the next night.

I'm nursing a poorly newborn and my eldest who's off school with an upset tummy (pretty sure it's due to eating a couple of peppers worth of sticks meant for pizzas but it doesn't make it better for school) dd is so unsettled and that's stressing me but if I can get to 8 with no wine I'll have done it cause I have the school run in the morning so need to drive

I'm new to this thread, am finding it really supportive as important trying to 'cut down ' or just feel in control of what I drink! Too often I use drink as a crutch/ reward at end of the day, and can easily drink a bottle of rose a night. It does stop me doing stuff, it's unhealthy, expensive and I don't feel comfortable with fact that I sometimes can't wait to open a bottle.. I've just separated from dh, over totally different (and numerous) issues, and feel really in control of things in general...and I think it's no coincidence that I want to reign this potential monster in at this point in time. Also it's unfair to spend so much on cheap booze, when I could use the cash to do things with myself dds..
Anyway I love this thread, it's helping me not drink, or just have one and then leave it..glad I've found you all

Do things with my Dds..not myself! Must check before posting

Hurleygirl and we're glad to have you here, glad to hear it is helping you, it's helped me tremendously.