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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Husbands not come home - not answering phone

267 replies

unicornpoopoop · 27/12/2016 10:05

Husband went out last night. Still not home. Not answering his phone or texts. Now what? Just wait and get increasingly stressed out/pissed off...?

OP posts:

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NoelHeadbands · 27/12/2016 11:32

Yeah I'm going to feel awful if somethings actually happened to him

I'm betting that this is exactly what he's hoping you're feeling right now.

I knew someone who used to do this... be a thoughtless arse who would hold back, knowing that the anger at what they'd done would be replaced by relief knowing they were safe.

It only worked a couple of times though.

MaisieDotes · 27/12/2016 11:33

All he's been going on about for a week is making this the best xmas ever for me and making a huge effort to make me happy

Have you not been appropriately grateful?

ThePeoplesChamp · 27/12/2016 11:34

Selfish prick, I hope DC havent noticed too much.

Oh..... and in case it hasnt been said.... LTB. Fucking Man-child.

unicornpoopoop · 27/12/2016 11:35

Oh he knows full well of how it makes
Me feel. I have anxiety issues due to a past traumatic event. I'm ok aslong as I know where people are/when to expect them home etc. And he knows I don't care, as long as I know not to worry.

I've managed to find a phone number for one of the people he was with family members and have text to say I'm worried and could they just confirm if he's there..

OP posts:

WhereYouLeftIt · 27/12/2016 11:40

"All he's been going on about for a week is making this the best xmas ever for me and making a huge effort to make me happy... Well that lasted long"

Right, that sounds like there's a looong history of him fucking with your head. That's a feckin' weird thing to say when you behave the way he behaves. He needs to shape up or ship out. You can't have a healthy relationship with someone like that.

DancingDragon · 27/12/2016 11:42

I'd call the police and hospital just in case.

unicornpoopoop · 27/12/2016 11:45

Well got a reply... Saying yes he's asleep on their sofa... On his own... No women...

OP posts:

MaisieDotes · 27/12/2016 11:46

They volunteered the "no women" part?

MaisieDotes · 27/12/2016 11:46

Glad he's ok btw.

rainbowstardrops · 27/12/2016 11:46

If he knows you have anxiety issues then he's an even bigger selfish prick than I originally thought.

It takes seconds to send a text. Even if he'd been arrested, he could have let you know. If he's been hurt then I presume he has a wallet with him with some kind of ID in.

He'd need a pretty decent excuse for me to forgive this one.

Hope you get some news soon

unicornpoopoop · 27/12/2016 11:47

Yes that information was volunteered... Why the hell
Would you say that?

OP posts:

rainbowstardrops · 27/12/2016 11:47

Sorry X post. And he can only just message you that at nearly midday???
I'd be telling him to stay there.

SantaIsABastard · 27/12/2016 11:48

How horrible of him. Hope he turns up soon.

ParrotPudding · 27/12/2016 11:48

It's hugely disrespectful to you OP and I hope you can see that. Regardless of any anxiety you may have, its common courtesy to let someone you claim to love and be committed to, know where you are in such situations.
I would be unbelievably made and hurt if DP ever did this to me. Hope that you are ok, and that you can have a great day now and put him to the back of your mind.

SantaIsABastard · 27/12/2016 11:49

Xpost. How odd to volunteer that information! In fact, it would make me think there was someone else. Otherwise why say it??

whyohwhy000 · 27/12/2016 11:49

Strange that they'd say "no women" at random.

ThePeoplesChamp · 27/12/2016 11:50

Yes that information was volunteered... Why the hell
Would you say that?

A bit sharp?

You husband has behaved badly and now we're meant to be all forgiving that he's not holed up with a hooker. He's still an arse.

Miserylovescompany2 · 27/12/2016 11:50

Erm, that text reply would lead me to think the polar opposite? Why would you stick that on the end of a text?

Unless you specifically asked in your initial text?

unicornpoopoop · 27/12/2016 11:50

I'm sat here sobbing now... He clearly just doesn't give a shit about me...

OP posts:

ParrotPudding · 27/12/2016 11:50

Also, just to add that if that information was volunteered, chances are its not true.
Or at the very least he has form amongst his friends for being a cheat.

Tartyflette · 27/12/2016 11:51

They could be shit-stirring. (And possibly for a reason)

ParrotPudding · 27/12/2016 11:52

Unicorn please please don't sob. You know your worth, don't stand for someone treating you like this. Go out, have a great day, and look after YOU.

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NoelHeadbands · 27/12/2016 11:52

ThePeoples

I think you've read that wrongly, I don't think the OP was questioning the people on the thread

WhereYouLeftIt · 27/12/2016 11:53

Ah unicorn I'm so sorry love . You are worth so much more than the way he is treating you.

unicornpoopoop · 27/12/2016 11:53

Thepeopleschamp - no that wasn't aimed any anyone here. I meant why would they say it in the text. He's absolutely an arse!

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